Redhead123

Thank you, everyone. I really appreciate everything you have said. No one really knows what is going on. He doesn't want to tell anyone because he is unsure.. But I ended up telling my mom and dad because it was eating me up inside. Through talking with them, I found out my dad went through something very similar after he got off his mission. So that was very comforting. My dad assured me that everything will work out and that I just need to be there for him during this time and that is what I have been doing. So the here and now I feel a lot better, but when I peek into the future, it scares me. He says that he will do ANYTHING I want him to do. If I want him to go to church and give blessings, etc. He will. But I don't want him to do it that way. I want him to want to do those things. I don't want to be the reason he does things. I feel like if I do take that route, he will grow to resent me one day. So I'm not even taking that into consideration. He says he still wants to go to church, pray, etc. But he is unsure. So the fact that he is trying keeps me sane.

My husband has expressed to me that he thinks the church is untrue. It goes all the way back to Joseph Smith and temple practices mirroring the Free Masons temple practices. He went on a mission, we are both endowed and we are sealed in the temple. We have been married a little over 2 years. I dont know what to do. I have been really bad about going to church. Our whole marriage has been him being the strong one. He always woke me up and pushed me to go to church and pay tithing, etc. I have faith and i know what I believe. I just struggle with actually going to church. I work all week & Sunday is usually my only day off and if i dong have it off I work while my ward meets. He doesn't want to make me question my faith, but when he talks about his doubts it makes me doubt and that feeling is awful. I know this is hurting him as much as its hurting me. He even cried when he told me (he NEVER cries). He was so worried I would leave him because of it, which I wont. I am just so worried for the future. I want our kids to be blessed as babies, i want to have a priesthood holder in my home, i want my children to get blessings when their vert sick, and most of all i want my children to see their dads testimony and how strong it makes him. I need advice....