I have been searching for an LDS support site and am excited to have found it! I asked my husband to leave the house about a month ago. After 14 years of him leaving me everytime we got into a big fight, I finally took a stand about being verbally abused. I know every marriage has problems, but don't many fight fair? My H, took me to the temple, and now throws it in my face that I control him with my religion, that he denounces it, etc. etc., then acts like he didn't say it. He calls me names (swears) and dismisses me when I ask him to stop or if I as for his help or even if I'm trying to explain why I'm sad or frustrated about our marriage. He had (has?) a problem with prescription meds and has been to rehab. This is his first year in "recovery" but I don't think it is working. All of the cranky, critical, mean, behaviour is still there.
So here is the lonely part, it is almost 2am and I cant sleep. I am so sad the kids and I are going through this. He acts like he has never been better now that he is away from me. I too feel better that he is not in the house yelling at us all of the time, but am miserable because I don't want to be a statistic, I don't want our kids to grow up like this, I want to be with someone who fights fair, loves me and shows me he loves me. My therapists and yes that is plural (marriage couples counselor, personal therapist) have told me to detach and move on. The other is trying to get me to take care of myself by sticking to my boundaries. Well ok, I am but guess what, it is making me more sad. I guess I am just a glutton for punishment, who can't admit that I married a weak man who doesn't appreciate his wonderful family and who would rather give up on us than fight for us and admit he has an anger problem and the aftermath of drug addiction and it is these things, not me that is causing the majority of the problems.
Anyway, just wondering if there was anyone else out there in my boat.
