Leap

Hoosier Guy, interesting that you would quote Mother Teresa. She is one of my heroes. She was also very qualified to make the statement you quoted. I don't know if you've heard that after she died they found documents and others confirmed that for many years she did not feel even God's approval of her service. They said that she had felt it so often up to a certain point, and then it was taken from her. (Could possibly be because she prayed to feel Christ's Atonement with Him, but only God knows) After a long time, she prayed to feel His approval, and she got a wonderful peaceful feeling for several weeks. Then it was gone again for decades. She struggled and struggled through her time on this earth. She felt so lonely and abandoned by God, but she kept pressing forward. She kept serving, and never revealed to the world her pain or doubt. I'm sure she will someday realize that what C.S. Lewis said is true that, "Some people feel guilty about their anxieties and regard them as a defect of faith but they are afflictions, not sins. Like all afflictions, they are, if we can so take them, our share in the passion of Christ."

I'm so sorry that you're feeling so terrible. Remember that in Ether it says, "Whoso believeth in God might with surety hope for a better world, yea even a place at the right hand of God. Which hope cometh of faith, maketh an anchor to the souls of men..." A relative of mine killed herself. She believed no one cared, and that she was alone. I've never seen or experienced so much suffering that came from it. At her funeral, the chapel was packed full of people who cared about her. Elder Holland spoke at the funeral, and reminded us that, "We live in a telestial world." That's why that scripture is so important to remember. Our time here is short, and we CAN hope for a better world, because through Jesus Christ there is a better world to hope for. It is real, and it is much better than the world we live in now. If you can hang on through the terrible storm here, you will find yourself resting from your labors someday, and will be in a "better world--" much better than this difficult place.

SecretSister, I'm so glad that you realize that what your husband is doing is wrong. (I used to work at a women's shelter) Abuse comes in many forms, and it is important for you to realize that although we are counseled to be long suffering, that does not mean putting up with abuse. You need to stand up for yourself in a righteous way, and let the consequences follow. I think you already know this. As you know, the fact that he's trying to "order" you to do anything, means that he is trying to exercise unrighteous dominion. The scriptures say "amen" to that kind of tactic. Good for you for being such a forgiving person, and trying to understand where he's coming from. All you can do is point out the truth to him, and try to persuade him to get help. Eventually he will have to make that decision himself. Until then, anytime he says something abusive, you do not have to accept it as OK.