Debs

That is the EXACT opinion i am trying to avoid someone thinking!!! At 41 i am not stupid or selfish enough to marry for any other reason and DEFINITELY not for entry to another country. I have had those opportunities and refused for obvious reasons. I think you may have TOTALLY misunderstood my original questions John Doe. Thanks for replying anyway

hi guys thanks for your feedback..........and the chuckles too!! im not actively looking for a guy to date, just more open to possibilities with someone who is of the faith. thankfully uk is still not a 3rd world country but on saying that if our government dont make up who is leading us we could well be!!! hahahaha seriously, there isnt any one guy in mind, just that i am toying with the idea of joining a dating site. i dont want to appear conceited or underhanded in a profile so till i figure out what would be the best route, in in truth the most direct but sincere, i am just in the thinking stage. good job eternity has no end cos my thinking time requires 'no end'!!! hahahaha im not in a hurry to date again, as i said before, im just opening my mind to it now. i did date a really nice guy for awhile but it didnt work out, thats kinda how i realised i'm ready for the next part of life again... thanks again for taking the time to reply :) debs

to wish to marry someone who lives in the country you want to move to? i'm not really into this online/long distance relationship thing but after opting to stay single for quite a long time now i feel like i'm now ready to move on but i have also decided to work on moving to where i ultimately want to live, in the states. but i'm cautious to mention this to anyone (guys) because i am aware it could come across like i am looking for an easy route, and that is far from the truth. so i got to thinking....should i put off dating till i'm there or should i start here and see what happens or should i just begin possible foundational friendships till i get there? i'm looking for opinions, mine are awol right now so a fresh brain would be most welcome! i'm 41 and divorced and being pretty well balanced none of my choices are light and definitely not ones i'm jumping in to, just processing. thanks debs

:) whatever he and i are meant to be will shine through soon enough, i'm sure. for now we're just rolling with it! :)

Thanks Happiness :) Marts....i agree. that has been a constant thought which is why when my friend suggested maybe we dont have the 'oomfff' for a long lasting relationship, only a friendship, i gave it some thought...as as much as i like this guy i am beginning to feel that this is all we are itnended to be.

you took the moving thing serious then eh? lol how long you left serving?

lol jbs......i hear ya!!! have you thought of moving? (i got that off another thread, not my very own thought!!!) debs

thanks..i think! lol its a tough one cos i dont mind compromising with my work or anything else, but not the kids school just yet. however....i decided to leave it to the Lord right now....a friend suggested that maybe our relationship is too easy and will not hold the right kind of challenges/strengths etc to be more than what we are now. sounds negative but it was only part of the wisdom she suggested!! lol so now i'm confused as well!! LOL

Hi Elgama I am in the woods....Forest of Dean. The Stake YSA wouldnt bother with me, i'm 41! lol However, the SA Rep has pretty much echo'd what you said yet knows how important it is for kids to have stability. If this guy had a job that kept him at one place then yes there is more of a compromise needed, but as he travels the country I dont understand why, for the time being, my kids cant have some stability in their lives here, we've only been here 4 months and everything had to be started from scratch in their lives. Maybe I need to rethink, but right now any other alternative doesn't ''feel'' right. Debs

Thanks WindRiver...it is by inspiration that i feel strongly about staying put right now. I have never had the spirit tell me anything otherwise whenever i've prayed about it :)

I talk to many Lds people all over the world, married, widowed, single, divorced, converts, grandparents...all sorts....but what rarely comes by are single Brit Lds people....why? Cos there isnt that many single adults out there that are either true to the faith (as best they can be) or are prepared to go out of their way to make a new life happen. I recently got talking to a guy I met through my new branch president, we got along really well, his kids were cute, even his ex spoke to me and we laughed around. Over the months they have both become good friends, and the ex even encourages us dating even though he lives 80 miles from me. He actively shows me how interested he is in me, my life, my work, my days, my kids and anything else, yet the one thing we cant agree on is where to potentially live.....i have made it clear that as my 2 youngest children have had too much unsettlement in the last 3 yrs since my divorce i feel i owe it to them to keep them in this house, these schools and with these friends for a while to come. I havent written off the idea of moving but i just dont feel right now is a good time. However, as this guy drives as part of his job, if we did get married it wouldnt be out of his way to pick up the children on a friday on his way back. Taking them home could be an afternoon out before dropping them off. Even his ex has offered to pick them up or meet half way! Me, i'm thinking this is the ultimate block, the reason he is preventing us going forward. Maybe theres something else behind this i dont know andi cant really tell (though i doubt it becuse he is very open and pro active towards me) so i'm stumped as to what to think. Dating in the uk is difficult at the best of times, but when you do finally meet someone there seems to be that one thing that almost grinds it to a halt. Or is that just my experience?

hi, thanks for the reminder! i know a friend in utah who was telling me about the way they change the times yearly, probably a good thing really. at least one year i'll get to eat my sunday roast at a time i'm accustomed to!! :) debs

hi i actually quite vehemently spitted out a comment to my bishop and his counsellors a couple of weeks ago that 'this church sucks when you are single/divorced because we are the modern day lepers'. i didnt mean to say it, i dont even remember thinking it!! however afterwards i sat and thought, i wasnt far off the mark there. i support every single/divorced/widowed person in this church and i know that even when the time comes for me to remarry i have been affected enough by my experience to go out of my way to fellowship anyone that isnt married, to me married people can still learn a lot from single people! good for you to stand up and say what you said, that must have really shook up the ward! debs

thanks hun :)

hiya :) i am convinced that you pay for the name of california when you live there! everything seems a lot more expensive! either that or you being charged for all that sun!!! lol debs