breathe_and_smile

Thank you for the responses. We are both in counselling...individual and as a couple. Part of the $170,000 was mortgage that hadn't been paid...thus the foreclosure. We were able to get some help from church, and family (who we had to pay back with interest) and then a quick sale of the house, using the remaining equity to pay off the rest (and pay back his family). It's been very hard, and through counselling have discovered some pretty big trauma that he is working to now face and overcome from his past. I am just really struggling with a lot of anger lately and I have a hard time letting go of what could have been or should be. My counsellor says I need to stop that or I'll make myself crazy (uh, ya!), to accept what is and try and build from there and find what to be grateful for. It's just way easier said than done. I have prayed and prayed and have not felt that I should leave at this point. He knows he is on major probation and is trying to get help and change. It's just a very slow process to work through and heal all that he has to heal. And I'm not the most patient person. And so I am trying to find healing for myself and not get consumed with the dark feelings. If The Lord wants us to try and rebuild, I need to find a way to let this go. Oh, and none of it was from gambling. Just really really bad financial decisions and frivolous spending. Thanks again for the responses.

I am wondering if there is anyone out there who is working on recovering from their spouse betraying them financially? I have been deeply betrayed by my husband, financially and also with porn and strip clubs. I have found support to work through the latter, but I haven't found anyone who understands the financial infidelity. The first time I found out, once all was said and done we had lost our home and about $170,000 (paid by my inheritance). We made some major changes and yet he found a way to do it again, using a credit card I didn't know about, and personal loans. Now we have no inheritance to dig us out of the pit of debt, are a low income family, and are facing years of scraping by (with several children) just to make the payments. I would love to talk with others who have faced/are facing the heartache of financial infidelity and gain some support and insight from each other. Anyone else out there?

Hi. I'm new here. I joined looking for a place for support for various challenges we face in life...parenting, marriage, etc. I see many great resources on here and also created a specific group for spouses who have faced financial infidelity (as I couldn't find a resource for that on here. I look forward to learning from this site!