SenSixB

I try to set a good example for her, and I tried to get her to come to the temple when we were sealed but she had to work. The first time I "REALLY" felt the spirit was when I was 18 standing outside the temple when my cousin got married. I was hoping for something like that with her...no go...I just wish there was some way that I could get some of the info I have found for her to her without knowing it was from me. Not to try to trick her but make it seem like a coincidence, like a talk with some profound message that will make her say...hmmm I need to get my crap together.

I need some advice as to how to bring my younger sister back to church. Its just me and her as far as siblings go. We were both raised LDS, I had a period of inactivity about 10 years, and last October, my husband and I took our four kids through the temple to be sealed. And for a few years now I have gotten this impression which I now recognize to be the HG, telling me, there was a someone out there. Be it a missionary or what I didn't know, that could reach my sister, and also my best friend since kindergarten, who is a non member. I have previously contacted missionaries in my sisters area, (she at the time lived with my parents) and nothing really came of it and I didn't feel I was taken to seriously. But lately over the past year I've come to realize that I AM the person to get to both of them. But, I'm not the most knowledgable of people about the church and I have always struggled with getting my points across. Anyways, my struggle is my sister, she is 27 single mom of a 3 year old girl. When she was 16 she was raped, and shortly there after developed a drug problem. Since having her daughter 3 years ago she has toned it down to just marijuana and alcohol, but still swears like a sailor, she has I'd say at least 50% of her body tattoo'd which I am convinced is her own form of "cutting", she is very stubborn, and can be close minded. The real "her" is a good person and very generous and caring and sensitive. But she has this alter ego we refer to as "easy-e", which includes a very tough exterior shell. She has told me that she does still believe in the church and has on occasion defended it to people being disrespectful towards it, but that she just doesn't feel like following all the rules. She lives with her boyfriend who is also a member, but is also inactive, but seems like a decent guy. I really just don't know where to even start with her. I try to talk to her about things, and I know the key with her is to not sound judgemental or critical, or be pushy at all, she is one of those that it has to be "her idea". The trick is getting that "idea" in her head. My mom has tried the guilt trick on her which worked with me, in reminding me that I am both responsible and accountable for my children learning the gospel, but my sister takes great offense to the thought, of her being separated from her daughter in the next life, just because she isn't a perfect mormon. Anyways this is very long, but I felt giving her history was appropriate in explaining why I feel stumped as to what to do. I am full of stories, and scriptures and talks and everything, but I have to get her to the point that she can accept that its important to come back to church first. So any advice anyone can give me would be appreciated. Thank you.

Just FYI I think the original poster deactivated their account.

Not all of the replies in here were negative but it did upset me at some of the responses on here.

Wow what a bunch of jerks there are on here...mentally disturbed? Thats not what I gathered at all... In my opinion the OP parent sounds like the disturbed one... sounds like a mean and cruel person talking about having there son committed and being crazy...maybe the OP needs to do some soul searching, about why there son is that way...I would live 30 miles away from my parents if they felt that way about me... If he is empathic...he avoids people because when you are empathic, you feel others emotions as your own, and that is very mentally and emotionally draining. I deal with it myself. But I've learned how to control it, and not let it effect me negatively and how to use it for good...but when your parents are negative like the OP on here it can have a HUGELY negative impact on you... Poor guy. Mercy: A Spiritual Gift the characteristics of a spiritual gift A Christian’s motivational spiritual gift represents what God does in him to shape his perspective on life and motivate his words and actions. Romans 12:3–8 describes “basic motivations,” which are characterized by inherent qualities or abilities within a believer—the Creator’s unique workmanship in him or her. Through the motivational gifts, God makes believers aware of needs that He wants to meet through them, for His glory. Then, believers can minister to others through the ministry and manifestation gifts of the Spirit, in ways beyond mere human capability and ingenuity, with maximum effectiveness and minimum weariness. Each person’s behavior will vary according to factors such as temperament, background, age, gender, culture, and circumstances. However, it is not unusual for individuals who share the same motivational gift to demonstrate common characteristics. Below are some general characteristics that are typically exhibited by those who have the motivational gift of mercy. General Characteristics A mercy-giver’s basic motivational drive is to sense and respond to the emotional and spiritual needs of others. Those with the mercy motivational gift have a divine ability to sense hurt and respond to it with love and understanding. The mature mercy-giver is kind and gentle. Mercy-givers sense and reflect the spiritual and emotional atmosphere around them. Whereas prophets, organizers, and teachers tend to project their attitudes to others, individuals who have the gifts of mercy and exhorting are more likely to sense how others are feeling. Mercies need to be needed. People with this gift must reach out and get involved, or their mercy will turn inward, resulting in an introspective focus that concentrates on their own hurts or fears. To the mercy-giver, spirituality is not a textbook analysis but rather is an emotional confirmation of God’s presence in his life. He is interested in learning doctrine mainly so that he can act on it and then feel that he has been obedient. If no feelings accompany his experience, he tends to downplay its significance. Mercies are drawn to other sensitive people. Believers who have the gift of mercy are the backbone of the prayer power in the Church. They feel they must pray. To them, prayer is an expression of their hearts to God, and nothing else they can do releases these emotions and captures God’s heart better than prayer. A Mercy’s Strengths Mercies have a God-given ability to sense a person’s spirit or the atmosphere among a group of people. They recognize the feelings that may be at work in others’ minds and hearts. When mercies are walking in the Spirit, this gift equips them to reach out to people who are suffering but who would likely be reluctant to tell others about their needs. Mercy-givers are attracted to people in distress; they love the people that most of us tend to run away from. Mercies love the unlovable, such as the handicapped, the elderly, the seriously ill, and the wounded in spirit. They are drawn to the outcast, the out of fellowship, and the rebellious. Mercy-givers run toward people who are unpleasant or unresponsive, reflecting the heart of God toward needy people. Because of their sensitivity, mercies do not take sin lightly—their own or someone else’s. Mercies tend to embrace humility, because of their sensitive spirits and awareness of their own weaknesses and failures. A Mercy’s Weaknesses Mercies can be indecisive, tossed to and fro by their emotions. (See James 1:5–8.) Mercy-givers can easily allow others to become dependent on them, when the individuals should be dependent on God. They often become rescuers of those who do not need to be rescued. The mercy-giver’s warmth can be falsely interpreted as personal, intimate affection. They must learn to temper their demonstration of affections based on the mindset of those to whom they are ministering. If they fail to do this, both parties may be led into temptation. Mercies are quick to take up others’ offenses, which can quickly lead to anger and bitterness. Because mercy-givers try to avoid conflict of any kind, they often avoid confrontation that is needed. Mercy-givers would rather hide from or ignore their enemies than confront them, even when they are in authority over those enemies. Delaying the inevitable always leads to more trouble—for everyone. Immature or rebellious mercies tend to be harsh and impatient, reflecting their own self-condemnation by lashing out at others whom they judge to be as weak or sinful as they are. Mercies tend to be introspective. As a person who is sensitive to hurts, it is easy for him to become overly sensitive to his own. If a mercy falls into this trap, he will wallow in past offenses, cling to past bitternesses, and dwell on past mistakes or sins. It is easy for mercies to develop a poor self-image, since they tend to be introspective and remain acutely aware of their own failures. The longer the mercy dwells on his failures, the more worthless and wicked he feels. Mercies tend to be worriers as a result of focusing on their own failures.

If it were me I would say take the lessons with the missionaries...possibly do it at another members house? Being that you are 19 you are aloud to do things on your own,(definitely don't lie about it though) but when you are done with the lessons and choose to convert, thats when I would tell them in a respectful way, if you haven't read the BOM then read it, if you have tell them how you feel about it all and that you feel this is the path you need to take, and that you hope they respect your decision.