aLmOsTmIsSiOnArY

I’m 19, just graduated high school last year, and preparing to serve my mission as a woman. I met and fell in love with a wonderful man, who is 20, who is also preparing for his mission. We spend all our time together. He’s trying to recover from depression and anxiety before his mission, however, which will take him an extra 6 months of recovery before actually leaving. Not to mention the 6 months longer his mission will be than mine. He leaves to his home country next month (he’s studying abroad here) to help himself recover. He’ll be back in 3 months to America to study for one semester before finally leaving. I want to wait for him now, so I can get an extra three months with him. We’re planning on getting married after our missions. Not only will I serve my mission, but I’ll have to wait one year after my mission for him to come back. I could wait half the time right now, and be with him, or just leave now. I’m very fearful of leaving his side, but feel mixed emotions as I’m happy for him, and excited about my mission. Whenever I see immediate and extended family, they ask me when I’m going, and often pressure me to go soon. For example; My boyfriend and I started working on my papers together this week. I was so excited to go tell my dad, who’s been asking me about it all the time. When I told him He said, “since when are you serving a mission?” As a way to say I’ve been taking too long to leave, and he’s disappointed. I talked to a general officer last Sunday, and he told me to listen to the spirit, and that I should focus on my mission. He said we could prepare together, as long as we’re not preventing or distracting each other from going. This anxiety of leaving, the pressure, the mixed signals and confusion have been eating me up for four months. Anyone have some advice for me? So far I haven’t seen any talks about this, and it’s not something we discuss at church a lot.