amantheycalljayne

You know I would love to just go right in a tell the bishop BUT like I've been saying you never know. If I were to get kicked out of school it would mean probably 1 to 3 years just to get back to where I am today. BUT if I wait a little while, delay my repentance, I will not have to worry about losing THINGS THAT HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH MY SINS AND HAVE WORKED SO VERY HARD FOR. Thats it. I think my original question was a little muddled up by the admin. I mean the only reason I am asking around is because I want some assurances that I will not get improper punishment. Getting kicked out of school would be the equivalent of being stoned to death financially for me. It would probably take at least a year to get enough saved to buy a DECENT car so I could drive to college at home, then I would have to see what credits transfer and start over as roughly a Sophomore-Junior. I mean as a punishment for going to 3rd base I think the above is not only inappropriate for the sin but waaaaaay overkill. And remember, I really didn't want to bring the name of the school into this, I go to BYU-Idaho: Where every molehill is a mountain. I mean one time I almost got kicked out for going camping with girls in a separate tent. We really had no idea that was wrong, in fact we were told by many that as long as the girls are in a separate tent its fine. Not to mention we heard all the time and still hear all the time of people going camping and thinking its okay as long as the girls are in a different tent. But we were treated as if we had committed mass murder! And there are others that have similar stories. I guess the gnats here are worse than the rest of the world...

Well I am at BYU-Idaho, where every molehill is a mountain. But thanks for sharing your experiences! Thats more what I needed to hear about. :-)

Yes that is very true. I cant remember where but its talks about how public sins are publicly punished and so on. This was not public but it would be very public in my circle of friends if I got publicly punished AND here they don't play by the same rules....

Yes totally! You should be able to tell your bishop anything! And I mean anything. Yes a bishop has the right to ask the question about anything including masturbation from woman or man. Usually they ask because something that was said brings up the question. Sometime especially for young men they just have to ask because its kind of a standard question now. Now there have been cases in the past of Bishops making advances towards young women and so on. We live in an imperfect world it happens sometimes. You know what is right and wrong, if he does something wrong, DON'T LET HIM AND TELL SOMEONE!

Correction its between me, the Lord and the Dean of Students.

And thank you for at least humoring me a little. Yeah I've been in the hot seat too, you're totally right about how it feels. I really would like to but I'm having a problem with the whole possibly being kicked out of school thing. Its a completely temporal thing thats lodged itself in the middle of my spiritual conflict. I mean it would be an extremely big pain to have to move home, find a new job, and start school again losing about a year or so of credits in the process. I know this should not be a problem but it is. I have this thought along with others of why not just wait until you are graduated to confess all of this?

So anyways.... Does anybody other than me find it a little wrong that something that is supposed to be between me, the other party, the bishop, possibly the stake president, and the Lord, is within the purview of the Deans of Students? That a real punishment is being affixed to sin? It used to be that way but thats all done away with now. I know several students here that have done way worse than I have and feel really bad about it but will not go talk to their bishop because they are afraid of being kicked out of school. Whats so bad about being kicked out of school? Well back home you have to lie to everyone about why you left the school or else you will be a pariah. You have to lie especially to your non member friends because it can and in most cases will do harm to the image of the church in their mind. To them these things are like breathing nothing is wrong with it them. You have to move home, moving is a horrific punishment on its own. Get a new job, a place to live if you parents are letting you come back home. Then if you want to continue school somewhere else you have to explain to them why you got kicked out of the last school you went to, worry about whether your credits will transfer, if you are taking your major specific classes they will not transfer, and have to come up with an excuse to tell your new student ward for leaving your old school right in the middle. So I see social, financial, and school specific punishments affixed to these sins (and remember this is specific to this school). I can totally see why some people just don't confess here. They say like me, "Can't I just get stoned to near death and get on with my life?"

Wow you all responded exactly how I thought you would. Thanks for nothing.

Okay I've been off my mission for a while and have slipped in my activity a little. I have been going to college and met a girl that is okay with doing certain things. We have called it off but before we stopped it we got into trouble. Now I go to a church school where I am afraid to tell my bishop because I could get kicked out of school. Now I know I should tell him right away but PLEASE just help me get the courage. I just would like to know FROM PEOPLE WHO HAVE HAD THIS PROBLEM BEFORE what you had to go through for repentance? I know all bishops are different. But I would like to in this ANONYMOUS forum to hear what those who overcame this went through. Thanks for your Time Stupid Guy Okay, Hero of Canton- This is a family friendly board, so please try to keep the graphical-type details to a minimum. This ain't the time or place for it. Dong Ma? Honos