digitalbath

a temple marriage is not a concern for me at all. it does not matter to me if i go to the lowest kingdom. what happens here and now is what matters to me.

fiannan- for the record I LIKE WEAPONS....LOL....

expecting and getting are 2 different things Malcom. and for the record I am a very positive person.

I am already perceived as "not as good" (damaged goods) by those that expect a RM to be married to. Next question.. is it possible to get married in the afterlife ??? and Would the church expected me to stay selabet (sex free) my whole life before being married ?? it is not reasonable or healthy. and yes I have had premarital sex. My hope is not to affend people by asking these questions. i just want realistic answers is all.

my dilema remains.

natehowe- the past is the past, but in reference to mormon girls still seeking out returned missionaries still remains to the present. I agree with you that the members are not perfect and I have known this for many years now. my love for the Lord is strong. if the Lord knows everything then he knows why I have not come back to church. he understands my reasoning. more later tomorrow. off to work now.

malcom- when i went to what was called Ricks college about a 100 years ago ha ha now called byu-idaho. my college ward bishop asked me when i was putting in my papers for a mission ?? I told him I did not want to go and he would not take no for an answer. he then said "what can we do to make you more worthy to go on a mission ?" i was so mad i ran out of his office. this is what started the inactivity. then treated as outcast by my home ward for not going on mission. having parents come up to me saying you can't date my daughter if don't go on a mission. slowly building up speed to for me not wanting to go back to church. then other reality problems at work ,making me turn to drugs and alcohol to cope with it all back then.

pushka-welcome. I was born into the church and have fallen away from not just feeling like an outcast for not going on a mission, but for many other reasons as well. from my past drug usage and of drinking alcohol. pleased to say i am drug free now of 13 years. back then about 20 years ago i hated my job, my boss, and had very low self esteem. that all changed when i moved away from california to utah to start all over again. what a story that is...do you have 4 days ??? lol anyhow...I am glad that you found your way into the mormon church. it can be a great church and can help you to become a better person. the standards are there for a reason. to learn how to become the best you can be for yourself and others. i hope you find what you are looking for. I am still searching. so many unanswered questions remain for me. as i get older hopefully i will have some of them answered. life is hard, but I love life. take care...later poof...

I am embaressed to say that I just might have to go the interenet route to find at least a girlfriend. my thoughts on being inactive sickens me, but that feeling of being an outcast remains there. many tell me to pray about it. it seems the only time I really pray with deep intent is when it's a life or death situation or if I am in pain and not knowing what to do. I know that I still feel lost and very alone. feeling very vonerable now. I have alienated myself to seclusion. the only confort I get is in my love of artwork to keep me sane. many here will think I have gone of the deep end. they could be right ???

fianan- thanks you for your response. I am embaressed to say that I just might have to go the interenet route to find at least a girlfriend. my thoughts on being inactive sickens me, but that feeling of being an outcast remains there. many tell me to pray about it. it seems the only time I really pray with deep intent is when it's a life or death situation or if I am in pain and not knowing what to do. I know that I still feel lost and very alone. feeling very vonerable now. I have alienated myself to seclusion. the only confort I get is in my love of artwork to keep me sane. many here will think I have gone of the deep end. they could be right ???

Argentina84- for the record I am male. and the 1 thing that I have learned from my last broken relationship... is to know what eachothers expectations are of one another. my values are being faithful, love and be loved, loving life no matter what, overcoming obsticles, having real life goals. being nice to everyone. respect the older people and love the young.

Moksha- I hope you are right. just not sure if I am even ready to go back to church. The Lord knows why I have stayed away. To many holier than thou types in my ward. they have forgetten why we go to church. is the lowest kingdom telestial or terestrial ??? I will probably end up there and be ok with it.

Malcom- I respect your response. You are obviously a mature person with much enlightenment and wisdom. For the record I am not proud of my inactivity. The Lord knows why I have not come back to church. My inactivity comes from the being treated as an outcast. Your version of eternity has made me think of the future. I am curious if you are a RM ?? no judgement coming to you if you are one either. I have no problems with the Lords judgement of me now. Life as an illusion. Reality and immortality hmmmm ??? Wish I had more time to chat with you. To many errands to do. until next time. Live long and Prosper. later, Craig. P.S. my favorite question is... What is life ?? lol have a nice day.

cursed ! lol

and no i am still single. i think i am a psycho girl magnet. lol

I see no problem with dating a non-member. i can so relate to that. want a good laugh ? well, here goes...did members really expect me to wait until i was married to have premarital sex ? NO way. i am 46 years old. did the church expect me to go sex free forever ??? lol... and yes i am a member but inactive for 13 years now. not proud of it... it happened because of not going on mission and i was treated as an outcast. still bitter about that and hung up on not being able to marry in the church because of most lds girls/women are preprogrammed to marry a returned missionary. many will say it does not matter if they a RM or not they have not walked in my shoes so they don't really know how hard that would be to find someone to marry in the church. some say go to another country..I have been to hawaii and mexico and other places and it all equally the same result. they won't marry you if you are not a returned misiionary. i often ask members if it is possible to get married in the afterlife and they just look at me strangely and don't know the answer. i am doomed then. the deilema remains. hope i have not bored you with this. ??? have anice day .

Moksha, I would like to move to England but having to pay for socialized medical treatments being 70% of your paycheck...no way. i am already sicking of paying the high taxes here. my tax refund check was pathetic and the processing fee arghhh way to high. i know I should have done it myself , but i want it done right lol...later poof...

well i can understand your story. there might be hope after all. just have not been to a church activity in 13 years is all. not sure if i can handle it.

i still have that dilema still. A lot of people just say move on , but its just not that easy. i am 46 years old and have you seen the singles in my area ???? yikes....

redhead he must be single lol j/k

Hi Redhead. thank you for your response, but the title "RM" has many more advantages for getting married to a mormon girl. i would agree with you on certain RM's are better than others. I was not forced to go on a mission. my father and brother went on missions. my parents let me decide. i think they already knew i did not want to go and could not force me to go either. send me your single girls from England now lol. i have a sister in England now. we chat later I am off to a late dinner Ciao.

:zorro: hi peeps. digitalbath here. my friend Squezy from ldschat.com told me to come over here while they fix the chatroom over there. I am mormon, but have been inactive for about 13 years now...why inactive ???...well long story...do you have 4 days ??? lol..the short version ???...ok... i did not go on mission and got some much crap for not going and was treated like an outcast for not going on a mission has left me very bitter towards the members. i am still a very spiritual person. The lord knows why i have not been back to church. so if i am to judged by him then so be it. i am good person and i think i should be judged from what i do on this earth. I preffer seeing non-lds girls for a date. some how it is just easier for me. the reason for this is that most mormon girls are preprogrammed to marry a return misionary and because of me not going on mission just pretty much narrows my mormon woman marrying kind to almost nothing. i know this sounds worse than it is , but it is the truth. some will say that there are many that don't care if a guy goes on a mission or not but I know for a fact this is not true from my own experiences in the church. having said all this i hope to have not upset anyone in this message board. You must see where i am coming from on my side of all this. anyhow...thanks for your time. for a good laugh I am always asking members if i can be married in the afterlife ??? still asking because I have a very bad feeling i will not be married or find the right girl for me. feeling so helpless it's almost sickenning. later bye, poof...

Krystal... if i were you. in your future "hanging out withs" future i would just tell the guys hey can we just hang out with no pressure of getting to serious about the future ??? cool, i need your opinion on some things... it is so refreshing to know that you are not a "molly mormon" type. i do understand that most are brainwashed into thinking a certain way. i was born into the church but about 20 years ago my life was not that great and I had a very hard time with reality and did things i was not supposed to do like drugs and alcochol. i have been drug free for about 14 years now. my life has changed for the better... still single but my last relationship lasted 4 years and then this girl went crazy arghhhh so i left her after breaking up with her for 3 times. seems i am a pycho girl magnet. arghhh... why can i not find a normal girl ???? ok I'll stop venting and ranting on... how was you day ??? lol...

I'd like to just hang out with you. never went on a mission, but i can imagine what it would be like to come home from a mission and expect girls to want to get married right away. you have to take into consideration these return missionarries have been deprived of being with a girl/woman for so long that i would think most would want to get married right away. the thing that i think with that is that these people don't even reallly know each other and i guess there would be a divorce very quickly down the road. you would not believe the crap i got for not going on mission. i was treated like an outcast. it is probably why i am still inactive for about 13 years. not proud of it... it is just how i was treated... it is wrong and i am left bitter still. i am a very spiritual person too. the Lord knows why i have not come back.