What's the best way to invite non-member friends?

[webmasterteen]

For a while now I've had a few really good non-member friends, one of which I've been hanging around for a while now. She's 15 and has some of the same interests as me.

I've invited her to my Stake's road show activity, with the excuse that she helped me with it (prepping for it) and might as well come see the results.

However, I have been encouraged to invite non-members to more activities.

The problem I see in this case is, she's a girl, and unfortunately I fear that someone, either her parents, or my parents, or my friends or someone will assume it's a relationship or something. Plus in general, when it comes to asking girls to join me on activities, I always need to find an excuse for myself to give.

Anyway, in a few weeks for our youth activities we are going to do water balloon volleyball and I figured she might want to join. However, I am failing to come up with a good excuse to do so. I don't want to say 'I want you to join my church, so come to our activities", yet I enjoy having her tag along with stuff.

What's the best way to invite a non-member friend who happens to be the opposite gender of you?

[LDSVALLEY]

I'm going to my church's Youth Activity and it should be a lot of fun, we will be you should come.

(provide appropriate details of course)

Sometimes we over complicate or over think things. If she is simply a friend and that is the relationship you have with her then invite a friend.

[webmasterteen]

Would inviting her to too many things be a bad idea?

[LDSVALLEY]

My oldest Daughter is 15 and will be 16 this year. She has invited friends who were boys to activities many times. A couple of them she had to make it clear the standards she follows and that it was friends only with no dating implied.

There are no magic answers, each situation is too different as are the people. I don't believe you can invite a friend to many times to anything that benefits your friendship. BUT you have to be clear on what your standards are and what the friends standards are. It doesn't matter if it is a male or female.

17 years ago I met the girlfriend of my friend. ( We were not members of the church then.) We became friends and started to talk. Her boyfriend had no interest in dancing so I ended up taking ballroom dancing with her. He liked auto racing and would go some Saturday nights, we would go to a movie or something. During those two years I had no interest in "Dating" the girlfriend of my friend. I will honestly say it never crossed my mind, because my standards said it was wrong.

Six months after they broke up we started dating, a year later on our first date anniversary I asked her to marry me. And we are still going strong.

If you first think of her as a girl then a friend then it might be wise to limit things to avoid temptation.

If she is a friend and then a girl then why wouldn't you invite her to activities?

Remember, I am a stranger and have no personal knowledge of the situation If you are really concerned a family member or church leader might be a better sounding board then people who are distant from the situation.

[webmasterteen]

Well here's what I said:

You see, every week on Tuesdays at 7 pm my church's youth group has some sort of activity at our church. Sometimes we play games, sometimes we practice for something on a Sunday. Sometimes we just goof off.

Well, not THIS week Tuesday but NEXT one (I believe) we have a water balloon volley ball activity that we are doing outside. And my friends will all be there of course.

Since I drive my sister and I to them every week, I would be giving you a ride to this, if you wanted to come. And I found out that you live in between my house and the church building. Which makes thing super easy and convenient.

So what do you say? Want to come have some fun playing volley ball and (finally) meeting my friends? If you don't, that's fine as well.

And what she said:

Sounds good to me! It's kinda hard to pass up water balloon anything.

In general, I'm not worried. However, my parents have noticed the increase in me inviting her to stuff and I'm just concerned that it might cause that train of thought. Really, she's just a really good friend who happens to be a girl.

[lizzy16]

I've had this same sort of issue. I have this amazing guy friend and I invite him to activities.

He really is the best guy ever. In fact, if he wanted a relationship I'd jump on it haha. Anyway, last one I invited him to was shooting. Everyone was very respectful and nice to each other. He was super enthusiastic over it and so sweet. My mom asked why I didn't go to prom with him. And, later another yw leader talked to me about him.

I just told them we we're good friends :)

When I invite him I'm way more informal about it.

"Hey david. My youth groups going shooting do you wanna come?"

[Saintmichaeldefendthem1]

If I were a non member (which I am) I would feel very lonely in a strange environment. The best way to ease that and get me rapidly involved is to prepare your fellow members for my arrival so they know to come up and greet me with, "Great to meet you, I've heard so much about you." Having at least 3 or 4 people make a concerted effort to meet me would do much to set my mind at ease. If I was a girl, at least a couple of those members should also be female, and should immediately invite both of us to a group activity with mixed genders. This would do much to release the tension of having the only person I know be of the opposite sex. I might greatly appreciate that you took the time to prepare a warm reception for me.

That's my opinion as a non member.