i need help with this.....

[dora14674]

hi, i am a member of the chuirch of jesus christ of latter day saints. i am currently still in youth and i find it really hard to talk to the young men without them getting the wrong ideas. i find it really sad that we cant just have a casually conversation without them getting all weird on me. what can i do?

[Guest Doctrine]

Talk with a friend you trust. dont worry about what others say or act just be yourself. boys will be boys.

Edited August 21, 2012 by Doctrine

[Guest]

Be yourself and set up boundaries. Let the young men worry about their wrong ideas. If they get wierd on you then tell them so! I mean like this way - "Hey, you're going wierd on me. I just want to be friends. Nothing more. Okay? Now, what were we talking about..." Yep. Like that.

[Leah]

What are they doing that is weird?

[slamjet]

What are they doing that is weird?

Being boy's. And I don't say this in jest.

I'm a father of four daughters. One in college, two in young women, and one still in primary. I have found that the one consistency between the three that have/are in young women is that to them, boy's are weird and they sometimes act inappropriate. But I think there are two things in play here.

1) The young man: They are growing up, discovering their masculinity and in general, being boy's and sometimes, jerks. They may know how to treat a lady, but they forget in an effort to attain machismo status with themselves and their friends. Be patient with them and make sure you have your boundaries set. Don't be afraid to talk to them but if they start veering off into inappropriate-land, cut it off. They're trying to impress you, they'll get the picture.

2) You: You are growing up and maturing also. you're discovering how to live in your own skin while discovering your own femininity. Additionally, a part of girls turning into young women is that you become very, very different than the boy's in the way you act, think and approach friendship. Being tough is not as big a part of friendship with you as it is with the boys just as being sensitive is not as big a part of friendship with boys than it is with girls.

The young men and women programs are training grounds for you both to grow up in while learning that there are definite rules that will foster your happiness now and throughout adulthood. So be patient, know your boundaries, know what you will and will not accept and demand that the young men to treat you with respect while understanding that they're still learning how to do just that.

[Leah]

Being boy's. And I don't say this in jest.

I'm a father of four daughters. One in college, two in young women, and one still in primary. I have found that the one consistency between the three that have/are in young women is that to them, boy's are weird and they sometimes act inappropriate. But I think there are two things in play here.

1) The young man: They are growing up, discovering their masculinity and in general, being boy's and sometimes, jerks. They may know how to treat a lady, but they forget in an effort to attain machismo status with themselves and their friends. Be patient with them and make sure you have your boundaries set. Don't be afraid to talk to them but if they start veering off into inappropriate-land, cut it off. They're trying to impress you, they'll get the picture.

2) You: You are growing up and maturing also. you're discovering how to live in your own skin while discovering your own femininity. Additionally, a part of girls turning into young women is that you become very, very different than the boy's in the way you act, think and approach friendship. Being tough is not as big a part of friendship with you as it is with the boys just as being sensitive is not as big a part of friendship with boys than it is with girls.

The young men and women programs are training grounds for you both to grow up in while learning that there are definite rules that will foster your happiness now and throughout adulthood. So be patient, know your boundaries, know what you will and will not accept and demand that the young men to treat you with respect while understanding that they're still learning how to do just that.

She did not describe the behavior, so we do not know exactly what they were going that she thought was weird. That is why I asked HER what she thought was weird. "Weird" can cover a lot of ground, so making assumptions about behavior for which you have no information isn't helpful.

[slamjet]

She did not describe the behavior, so we do not know exactly what they were going that she thought was weird. That is why I asked HER what she thought was weird. "Weird" can cover a lot of ground, so making assumptions about behavior for which you have no information isn't helpful.

Well, I answer from having the experience of being asked the same exact question many times over by my own daughters and having a son who act like a typical boy around girls.

[dora14674]

wow! sorry, when i try and approch them the immediately go on thhier pones and pretend to start texting,, or they will like move away lke im sort off "disease". they act shy and mumble under their breath.. lol they think im probably going to marry theem? hehe. sometimes i find it hard myself to talk to boys because we have nothing to talk about?

thanks :)

[Dravin]

sometimes i find it hard myself to talk to boys because we have nothing to talk about?

thanks :)

A pretty much guaranteed topic of conversation is someone's likes. You don't have to like the same things they do, but it gets the conversation going, just look at it as an opportunity to learn something about them and the topic at hand. You may not be interested in X sport, or robotics, or some TV show but generally people love to explain what it is they enjoy. Don't know what they like? Be observant, I don't mean stalk them, but what are they wearing? Do they have a sports T-shirt on? When ever you walk by them are they talking about a TV show or book with their friends? Now you have a starting topic.

[Leah]

wow! sorry, when i try and approch them the immediately go on thhier pones and pretend to start texting,, or they will like move away lke im sort off "disease". they act shy and mumble under their breath.. lol they think im probably going to marry theem? hehe. sometimes i find it hard myself to talk to boys because we have nothing to talk about?

thanks :)

How old are you?

I don't know why a guy would think you are going to marry them because you talk to them. Besides, it's not like you can marry them without their cooperation!

They might simply not be interested in talking to you or to girls in general. There are times in their lives when other things are more important to them. Young boys usually do act weird around the opposite sex. Some of them never outgrow that behavior! :)

[dora14674]

thanks guys. maybe i should try to not overthink things and just let it flow.