To My Friend Chad: Goodbye Buddy

[rosie321]

Always? Well I dont know about that, but certainly now. Chad wasnt happy, I am. Chad wasnt a member, I am, but havent always been active. When I was very inactive, I was also very unhappy. In some ways I wanted Chad to explore his spiritual side, at least take a step into trying to live a Mormon lifestyle just to see or experience some form of happiness. The things that prevented me from accomplishing that was that he couldnt deal with me being in competition with him at work and be friends at the same time. During the leadership training, he wouldnt answer my phone calls when I needed support, and I understood that. The business friendship we had became less and less. As his paranoia grew, I was concerned about his medication he was taking. He did realize his meds were making him feel different, and he seemed to enjoy that. He seemed to have a fascination with them. There were days that he seemed to be high on them. I did report it a week ago to my boss, she said that was the way he normally was. Looking back now, in retrospect, Im not so sure. I knew he wanted to be in leadership training really bad, and knowing how much it affected him (or at least from what I saw) I was ready to quit and have him take my place in the hopes that would make him feel better. It appears I was a day late. So, yes its survivors guilt.

Telling you guys that, you should probably know that I probably wouldn't have left the Leadership Training. Some of my personal advisors have stated that I needed to continue, especially now. So I am.

Your leaving leadership training wouldn't have helped anyway. Being a good leader involves handling great stress and possessing emotional fortitude. It looks like thats something Chad didn't have. Had he been in the training and gone to become a leader the same type of thing would have happened, maybe just a little later. He was an emotional time bomb waiting to blow. Maybe the merciful hand of the Lord as suggested above removed this burden from him. Hopefully he will be able to see differently now

As a leader you will have to deal with others like Chad too. You have already pointed out some signs that you saw and feel you missed. Maybe these things will prove useful to others. It will help you identify and look for sources to direct people you lead, minimizing repeat occurances.