Hey, I'm new on here and current investigator. I would love to chat with you on this subject. I may or may not have goiod advice but I find myself in my current turbulent marriage chatting with a girlfriend and feeling so much better afterwards. Im then able to not express myself to him sideways and come to him on another level or be able to give the space needed that I wouldnt have been able to do without venting first. Sadly this stuff will consume you if you allow it to. And I'm so sorry you are going through this. What I can say is only you know what type of connection is left for the two of you when you are together. ask yourself this" what are you sacrificing to be with him" "what do you like about him, not love but like" and then ultimately I would suggest you both sit down and agree to give it x amount of time and do your best and I mean day in and day out. figure out why you like eachother all over again, find the friend you lost, if you can manage to do this you are on a road to a possibly once again happy marriage. Also ask yourself this " can you forgive him, truly forgive him? I would spend some time alone to ask yourself this question. Then maybe think about things you can do to better yourslef and then do better for him. remember we will never change anyone, but you can better yourself and no better time than now. if it works and you commit to working on you, he will have one desirable wife all over again he will never want to look at another woman and if you dont work things out, you will be one confident and stong woman getting out there again. somethimes we have to train ourselves to love all over again, my personal experience, and i feel that it's ok to do this, but is he? I did find myself beeging my husband to talk or hold me things like that and these things made it worst. it made me feel horrible because its not like me, but after being with someone for this long and truly believing in us being soulmates, for a while I couldnt grasp on to why this man became the way he had. So now is the test of time for myself to get back on my "a"game and never beg or depend on any man again 110% my confidence since has grown and i am fully desirable to him. the more i would cry and let him know i needed him he tended to not care even more, well thats what he showed but that wasnt the truth. he now is commited to really really working on us and in the end we can say we gave it one last honest go round. you owe it to the relationship. best of luck
brooke