AnaMarzen
-
Posts
31 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Posts posted by AnaMarzen
-
-
...I'm just finding out now that I have a weird smell to me... lol
I don't smell strange... I don't think...
But that's what my sister is saying. Jeeze...
-
Yeah, things aren't great for me right now. But that's okay.
So here's what I have ahead of me today:
Not going to be easy, considering I get light-headed every time I bend over! lol But my mom and my sisters are going to help. I just hope they keep the judgment to a minimum. My sisters have been joking about it a little, which makes me uncomfortable. But I need the help.
And I made sure to empty out all of my fast food wrappers out of the trash can! lol
-
Ana, thanks for sharing your story. I have a daughter who struggles with a severe weight issue, so I think I can sort of see where you are coming from. I think all that can be said has been said by everyone else, but take that advice because it's good. You need to get your life in order--not just the weight. It's like the gospel--get the basics right and everything else more or less falls into place. Look at your sleep habits, your social habits. And keep up the positive outlook.
Thank you Nadia!
Yes, I know my life is a mess and it reflects in my health. Just today, I didn't wake up until 1:30 and I went straight to the Wendy's drive through. BAD! lol
Other than that, I've been sitting on the couch all day and eating leftover cake. But I can feel that I'm ready for a change. I don't want anymore lectures from my sister! It sucks to be disappointing her. I can tell that my lifestyle and size worry her and my family.
Other than that, my apartment is a mess. My family is actually coming over today to help clean it out. My mother made some off-hand comment about the smell yesterday and it nearly broke my heart.
But anyway...
Thank you for all of your advice, everyone. It means a lot. :)
-
i think it has a lot less to do with medicine that people, generally, just dont like to look at fat and they do like having people they can feel superior to. Our culture certainly pushes that idea. Check out all the jay leno jokes on fat, even on children. Ironic since he isnt all that thin. Never heard him tell a joke on thin yet.
Thank you!!!
-
I want to know what you like doing, AnaMarzen? What do you listen to and just share more about yourself besides what you've already shared.
I messaged you!
-
Well, I think fat jokes are as crass and tasteless as anorexia or bulimia jokes.
Well thank you.
-
That's because thin is not and never has been considered funny, per se. The ridiculousness of how certain "pipe cleaner" skinny people (usually men) look has been commented on and laughed at -- e.g. Mr. Collins in Pride and Prejudice or Ichabod Crane in The Legend of Sleepy Hollow -- but thinness itself has been associated either with beauty or with starvation, neither of which are generally considered fodder for jokes. Those jokes that do exist tend to be about conditions such as anorexia, and so are considered crass and tasteless.
Point taken!
I've been the butt of many jokes throughout my life, and I must say that it discourages me from going out most of the time. I am kind of funny in appearance, and I know that. I'm an easy target for the fat jokes and the stares.
Thanks for all the replies and advice people!
-
Hi, Ana. I can tell you first hand that weight loss is not easy, but it's certainly possible. I'd like to suggest that you look into a local Weight Watcher's meeting. They can help you get started with a healthy eating plan, give you information on portion control, and offer you lots of support. It's even likely that you'd find an exercise partner there as well...someone to keep you accountable and motivated.
Start slow. Don't try to save the world in one day. Maybe add a few healthier food to your diet, cut out some of the things you know you shouldn't have (like fast food), eat smaller portions, and start walking, even if it's just a stroll to the end of the block and back a few times a day. You'll be surprised how quickly your body adjusts to the exercise and you'll find that you'll start feeling better both mentally and physically. You'll soon be able to walk way farther than you ever thought.
Remember that you're making a lifelong change and you have to understand that you didn't gain the weight overnight, so it's going to take awhile to lose it. Stick with it and you'll soon start to see good things happening.
Thank you for the kind words. :)
And yes, I definitely need someone to keep me accountable! lol I fall back into terrible habits, very easily. I know my sister is going to start walking with me and that will help a great deal.
As far as the mental and physical part, it's funny... my mind doesn't feel too sharp, ya know? I just feel a little... slow, for lack of a better word. lol So I'm sure that once I start eating fresh food and I get moving, my mind will perk up too. :)
-
Psychologist: Tell me more about your multiple personalities.
Kilogram: Well I feel like I'm made up of all these smaller pieces that make up my whole.
Psychologist: And just how many of these smaller pieces are there?
Kilogram: Depends on who is trying to use me, sometimes it's just me, sometimes there are a thousand, sometimes even millions. It's horrible but it could be worse.
Psychologist: How could it be worse?
Kilogram: My friend the slug, he just seems so lonely. Nobody seems to use him anymore, and to tell you the truth I think he's jealous of how popular I am.
Wa wa waaaaaaaa....
LOL!
-
That's quite nice of you to say. Judging by the reaction of some others to me during my time on this list, you may not feel that way after being here a few weeks...but I daresay you're right, we'll be friends. I do have a few of those here. :)
To be clear, it's not a book on weight loss. Not by a long shot. It's a book about how various things reach a "tipping point" and become a fad or a nuisance or a way of life. It's kind of a book on mass psychology. Very interesting, though.
Ah, I see. Sounds like a fascinating read though.
And it's okay, I have thick skin (literally and figuratively LOL!)
-
It's funny what happens when you ween yourself off of fast food.
I've got a few kids and our lives, over the years, have been pretty crazy. Too often I've ended up in the drive thru. Recently, I've been avoiding that (and other processed foods) and cooking fresh at home. The other day, we got big macs cuz we were starving and far from home. My kids wouldn't even eat them. They said, "This is so gross, Mom." We went to the grocery store instead and picked something different.
Sounds like you are headed in a really good direction. I wonder what you'll pick as your substitutes for fast food and soda. I decided to find some of my favorite recipes and I make them ahead of time. Then, when I need a little comfort food, they are there for me just like the donut used to be. I've got a killer chicken salad recipe and fruit has become my sweet treat. I feel better and my depression is better too. I really like the concept of using food as medicine. It's just about picking the right foods. :)
It's funny how that works, huh? I can see now that I am 100% addicted to fast food, soda and high fructose corn syrup. The stuff is seen as "gross" to most people but I swear, it's like crack to me! lol
-
Aw come on! Maybe I can kill him with kindness.
-
Problem with big loser is that they are going for fast loss and big audience ratings. Fast loss usually means fast back on again. CalorieCounter.com helps you set reasonable goals and gives a real timeline for weight loss not one based on ratings. There is a forum there specifically for people who want to lose over 100 pounds.
I am sure the site another member recommended is excellent as well. (sorry cant see who that was while typing this!)
I do not think you can lose this weight just be getting rid of your depression. It will help a lot I am sure but it is going to require work and perseverance, which is the problem I am dealing with now. The scariest part to me is as bad as the weight is now it can get lots worse if not dealt with.
Very true, Anne. I need to deal with this now.
I'd hate to be bed-ridden in 10 years from now.
-
Why?
She thinks that it would be too difficult for me, at my current size, which I agree with. Plus, can you imagine what Jillian would do to me? lol
She'd tear me apart!
-
If the photos are motivating for you - go with the flow! You're going to need to figure out what works for you. I also just wanted to comment on the last part of your post here.. Don't compare yourself to your sister. I understand that's hard to do when you're with your family and feel like the odd one out. But regardless of how much you weigh, there's a point where you have to accept that you are not your sister, and your sister is not you. I encourage you to checkout Lose It and maybe network with other people that are in the same boat as you, and get a support system going with others that can relate to your situation. That's not to say that your family can't be inspirational or supportive, of course they can but you may find some peace and comfort reaching out to others that also want to lose X amount of weight.
Very true. I was also seriously considering trying out for The Biggest Loser. But my sister has advised me against that. lol
-
Oh, and as you can see in the pictures, I'm still in my pajamas. lol
It was 2pm! I feel like that's the worst part! lol
Another thought - I sleep 10 - 12 hours a day and when I'm not asleep I stuff myself with fast food and sugary snacks. I'm very depressed - I'm just realizing this - slow form of suicide? Could be...
-
Please keep in mind that that girl is a daughter of God, with inestimable worth. Being morbidly obese is not a good thing, but it's not something that condemns you. If you really want to, you can do something about this; it's not a lifelong sentence if you don't want it to be so.
In The Tipping Point, Gladwell tells of a morbidly obese man in his early or mid 30s. (Let's see if I remember the story correctly.) This fellow was a big, strong guy, but had been eating out of control for years, and had ballooned to 400+ pounds. He tried and failed to lose weight in many different ways. Finally, out of desperation, he had his stomach banded. Predictably, the weight began dropping off.
But the really interesting thing was his relationship with food. He ate as much as he could, and he was bothered that he was unable to eat more than a little bit. This was amazing to me. We think that we eat because we are hungry, but in general, this is false. Many Americans truly have no idea what it means to be really hungry. We eat because we think it's time to eat, and because we derive enjoyment from eating. This is why even stomach "stapling" often fails.
The coda of the story is that, after a couple of years, Gladwell got back together with this guy -- now much slimmer, far more fit, able to do more than walk up his stairs without collapsing. And the guy told him that, while he still liked food and enjoyed eating, he just didn't want to eat very much at a time any more. It was a psychological change, not a chemical or physiological change, that really mattered. Some few morbidly obese people manage to make this psychological change without drastic surgery, and as a result drop hundreds of pounds. But that psychological change -- doubtless with important physical and physiological aspects -- seems to be the real determiner of whether someone beats obesity or not.
Fwiw.
You're so kind, Vort. I can tell we're going to be friends. :)
To be honest, I can't remember the last time I was truly "hungry". I eat almost constantly and in excessive amounts. I can remember once eating an entire birthday cake and getting someone else's name written on it so the baker wouldn't know that I was going to eat the whole thing by myself. I went home and ate the whole thing.
But I really need to read this book! lol
-
Hi, Ana.
A helpful weight loss tool is Lose It. It is also available as a mobile app for iPhone and Android for on-the-go. I have it on my iPhone and my Droid. What I love about Lose It is how customisable it is. You insert your stats: gender » height » weight and set a goal as to how much total weight you wish to lose or maintain. You can break this down into (for example) wanting to lose 1/2 pound per week. Lose It will calculate how many calories etc are ideal in order to achieve your weight loss goal. Both apps are super neat. You can scan barcodes on store bought goodies, search restaurant menus, etc, and log it all into your personal chart. It also has options for including an exercise program, which is editable, you can use the default settings or create your own workout routine. A great feature of Lose It is being able to network with others that are striving for the same outcome - to lose weight or to maintain a certain weight. You can connect with friends, or new people. Hope this helps.
Thank you Bini! That sounds very useful!
-
Might be helpful to look at why you eat.
Eating (sugar) gives us a little dopamine. Dopamine is the bodies natural form of herion. We need it to in order to experience good feelings. When we are down in cycles of depression and anxiety, eating is a quick fix. Sometimes it can have a self destructive quality to it. But mostly it's just about achieving comfort.
Could any of this be going on with you?
If it is, it might be cool to work with your therapist on developing tools to manage the depressive feelings. If you have trauma in your past, clearing it could help the depression. Repairing any thinking errors can also help.
I really like what Vort said about intrinsic worth. Developing real self love inside ones core and learning how to look compassionately at our "stuff" really helps too.
At the end of the day, overeating is often just a coping mechanism. Depression is one too, for that matter. If you can increase your awareness and make some adjustments with how you cope, your weight just might take care of itself.
Very true. I think my therapist and I are working towards that. I consume way too much fast food though. I know that much. McDonald's has been a crutch for 3-4 days a week and I'm sick of killing myself with that stuff.
-
Some suggestions. Delete the photos. You dont need to slap yourself like that. Trust me on that. :) Dont drink diet pop. I switched from a&w to flavored no calorie water and have gained 50 more pounds. I have been reading that the fake sugars may cause your body to change the way it uses sugars and not in a good way.
Your depression may be caused in large part by the weight. I went to my doctor a few years ago and he asked if I was depressed. I told him of course I was. I had been gaining weight then for no apparent reason and was very depressed over it. So he gave me an antidepressant. I did take it because it is also recommended for fibromyalgia, which I have and it does work well for that. It also, they are telling us now, causes weight gain. Nice. So the point being, be careful.
There is a very good website: Calorie Counter | Food Nutrition Data for Healthy Eating Choices It has some excellent tools and support forums and it is completely free.
You can get your respect back. lol I hope since I am working on that too. :
Thank you Anne!
Oh wow, diet soda is a big vice of mine! I go through 3 or 4 Diet Cokes in a day. And it's hard for me to drink any other sodas due to my high blood sugar.
I may eventually delete the photos, but right now they're helping to motivate me a bit. I just can't believe that I look that big! Underneath all of that, I look like my sister Liz. Hard to believe!
-
My biggest piece of advice is to start small and build up. If you try to run the marathon on your first day you'll make it 100 yards, be winded, and feel like it is an impossible goal. Also realize it'll take time, it can be so disheartening to go that month being so good with your diet and exercise and find you've only lost 4 lbs. The effort of getting started makes it feel like you should have lost 50lb. Just keep in mind that with time it becomes habit.
Oh, speaking of habit, what ever regimen you get on, make sure it's sustainable. The applies to both exercise and eating. You need to pick something you can, and are willing, to maintain for the rest of your life. If you cut out all of the food you may love you will crave them, they will call for you, and when you understandably partake of them you will feel you failed and with the discouragement cam the temptation to just give up. So when you work out your diet (not as in a fad but as in the foods you will eat for the rest of your life) make some room for a Friday Night bowl of ice cream.
Additionally, and this is a personal experience thing, the occasional splurge won't sabotage you as long as it is just occasional. If occasional turns into every other day it will cause problems, but if you let yourself go hog wild on Thanksgiving, Christmas, and your Birthday it's not the end of the world.
Thank you Dravin. :)
Yeah, my problem is that I've been going hog wild for quite a few years now. lol That, combined with the fact that I usually sleep the day away. I'm done with that though!
And here are the pictures. So embarrassing! lol I never want to see this girl ever again!
I was trying to say "stop!" and I'm laughing a bit in the one picture. (not so funny now!)
http://www.lds.net/forums/picture.php?albumid=17&pictureid=99
http://www.lds.net/forums/picture.php?albumid=17&pictureid=98
Oh, and here's my sister Lizzy, right after her talk with me! She seems overwhelmed! lol
http://www.lds.net/forums/picture.php?albumid=17&pictureid=100
-
It can be one, the other, or both. It's a difficult formula to master, but it seems clear that some people are more susceptible to obesity than others. There are documented conditions where obesity is merely a noted side effect of the condition.
In most cases, weight can be controlled with good eating habits (including portion control) and proper exercise. This requires a lot of discipline, and it may be harder for some people to maintain weight control than others. For example, people with thyroid conditions are known to have trouble maintaining weight.
You say most of your family is fit, but you are not. I would schedule an appointment with your physician to investigate if you have any conditions that may make weight loss a challenge. I would also schedule an appointment with a nutritionist and your trainer. Get started on a healthy lifestyle now and make it a habit.
To some degree, perhaps you deserve to feel that way. At the same time, if you've not left the house for months, you may want to be evaluated for depression (also known to be associated with obesity).
Move forward with a goal of a healthy lifestyle. It may not always be easy, but it's worth it. And seriously, get yourself evaluated for medical conditions that could affect your weight and for depression. If you get proper treatment for these conditions, you may find your weight problems much easier to manage.
If you have such conditions, don't use them as a crutch. Treatment is meant to aid you in your pursuit of wellness, not give it to you. Be disciplined, appropriately self-critical, and optimistic. You can be healthy and you can be happy.
Thank you for the kind words. :)
I haven't had much to be happy about lately. I know that I'm depressed and I'm getting help for that. I just need to focus on my weight now.
-
Feeling guilty and sinful is useful only inasmuch as it inspires action to change. So feeling like you're an awful, worthless person merely because you're obese is worse than useless. Your intrinsic worth is not dependant on your weight, or for that matter even on your actions.
There are many, many excellent reasons for you to find a way to lose several hundred pounds of weight. Feeling like you have no worth or are a bad person because you're fat is not one of those excellent reasons.
Those are my thoughts. I have no wisdom to offer you on the specific matter, but I was fascinated to read a Malcolm Gladwell book, The Tipping Point, that addressed this very issue in a most interesting manner.
Thank you Vort! I'll check that out!
I know that being obese isn't a failing in itself but I know that I got here by overeating and sitting on my butt all day. So I know how to correct it but I'm just to a size now, that it's difficult to do some things, believe it or not. Walking is not the easiest thing at this size but I can do it in short bursts. I guess you have to start somewhere, right?
-
I think trying to cast it as either or is a false dichotomy. I don't know if you were intending to do so, but I felt like it needed to be pointed out. Some people have legitimate medical concerns, some people are suffering physiologic difficulties, and for others gluttony or sloth may be the reason or part of the reason.
I think though that it's also important to point out that even if the problem is gluttony or sloth (which I'm taking to mean over-eating and not trying to exercise) that something can be identified doesn't mean it's easy to fix. Also it is easy to try to paint it as the worst sort of failure or problem one can have, context is important and as a practical matter brow beating people to lose wait usually doesn't work. Eating is a common stress and depression coping mechanism.
About the general topic of obesity? Or are you looking for things people may have done to help them lose weight?
Sorry if I was kind of vague! Yes, I guess I was looking for good ways to help me get moving and motivate me.
And the depression part, very very true. I've been seeing a psychiatrist for a few months now. Severe depression.
The Obesity Epidemic
in Advice Board
Posted
Haha! Well I hope I don't smell like fish!
She's just saying that I smell sweaty. Which makes sense, I guess. I mean, I'm almost 500 lbs for Pete's sake! I sweat pretty constantly... :/