mightynancy
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Posts posted by mightynancy
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Therapy and medication were the answer for my daughter, who was 9 when the anxiety reached crisis level. Don't dismiss medication out of hand; for my child, the medication took the anxiety to a level where she could employ the techniques learned in therapy. Without the meds, the anxiety would run away with her and she'd be unable to do anything about it.
When people claim that meds "cover" I don't understand what they mean. The right meds help the child be her truest self. If a child is "doped" then they're not on the right drug or the right dose. I understand that meds alone are not a fix, that therapy + medication is the gold standard.
Richards is spot on.
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I don't think you can lump all teens into the same pot. I think that looking at people as individuals is infinitely more helpful than looking at them as part of a group.
When bad behavior comes up, it's more useful to discover the root of the behavior than to just chalk it up to "teen" issues. You may recognize your child in the Mistaken Goals Chart that is part of training in Adlerian psychology.
Also, even though it was ages ago, I remember wishing to be noticed for what I was doing right, and for the bad things I wasn't doing...I work to do that for my teen!
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Wow, harsh (Eo).
Information can be a burden; think twice about handing this one to your kids.
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Another patriarchy bites the dust.
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In your shoes, I'd try to avoid the drama as much as possible and focus on your immediate family (wife and baby). Practice being polite, for those times when you can't avoid those who will try to start stuff.
Do you and your brother live near enough to get together often? What's your wife's family like? I'd focus energy on those relationships that work.
It's painful when family members don't do what one would expect from them. That said, what can you do but move forward with your life? It's important to acknowledge the sadness of it, but not to remain "stuck" there.
My kids have some grandparents they've never met - while they're curious why (what can I say? They don't care to come see you?), that "hole" is filled with aunties and uncles and cousins, and the other grandparents.
We readily preach the ideal, but reality is often more complicated and messier. Best wishes to you as you move forward.
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What a thoughtless comment!
If there were a laugh, button, I'd click it.
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The definition of hypocrisy is the attitude of holding others to a different standard than self.
One size does not fit all. I think the definition of compassion is understanding that we each have our gifts and weaknesses, and taking that into account when "holding others to standards."
bcguy, I'm sorry things are so hard for you now. What LiterateParakeet said is true - even when those near to you don't get it, the Savior does.
I often feel alone in church, not because nobody is intervening on my behalf, but because my questions are rebuffed; I'm even told I shouldn't think about things so much. We've had a couple of sacrament meetings in the last year that were really fulfilling for me because they were so human and it was clear that we were a community of worshippers. It's a pity it's so rare, but it happens. I pray that fulfillment comes your way, in whatever form is most meaningful for you.
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and that there hasn't been a Mormon poligamist in almost 150 years
You're kidding, right?
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There are a lot of false dichotomies, and I think that making the depicted haircut exclusive to respecting the Sacrament is one of them.
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Another thing to keep in mind is that we don't only serve God through the Church. We can serve God in our families, at work, and in the community. I don't just mean volunteering, I mean that when we treat others with love, we're serving God. Being stretched too thin make this much more difficult.
Best wishes to you, Wolfboy.
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Keep in mind that this church is run by volunteers. If you want to be released, let the bishop know, without waffling, that you can't do this right now.
Due to a stressful family situation, I asked to be released from a time-consuming calling, and it was exactly the right straw to remove from this camel's back. If my bishop were unwilling to release me from this volunteer position, I'd let any impacted people know and then just stop doing it.
Mental illness and med changes can be really hard, and a lot of people don't understand that. I'm glad your family is there for you. :)
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A bit of perspective, by Anne Campbell.
To My Child
You are the trip I did not take,
You are the pearls I cannot buy.
You are my blue Italian lake,
You are my piece of foreign sky.
I first read this poem when I was expecting my first child and memorized it immediately. While on one hand, this is about giving up certain things, but on the other hand, it's about the wonder of getting to know this new little person. My children are pearls that no money can buy; they're a whole new world.
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while a cruel example i do find funny irony when a girl is say raped but dressed in a tank top and short shorts considering the dress very much screams i want to do it with someone right now...
this idea goes further once you push the bounds past immodest dress. as ultimately it says im horny come get some. people then truely look at each other as objects. soon sex before marriage follows or adultrey(spelling?) .
Wow. So, at what age does a tank top broadcast a desire for sexual contact? How about on a four year old? Seven? Ten? Fifteen? Eighteen?
Is this young lady's clothing saying anything other than, "It's summertime!"?
Also, how did you obtain this mind reading ability? I want me some of that.
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I'd recommend trying to live on the one income for a few months, and pop one income into savings. See what happens; see which activities and purchases you can modify to be more budget-friendly. Make any significant and necessary purchases now while you have the money to spare.
Being a new mom *can* be isolating - so go into it with a commitment to find and maintain supportive friendships. If your current friends view your baby as a drag on the fun, well, you'll need to find more like-minded friends. If you're open minded and not shy, meeting people in a similar life situation is easy (at the park, pediatrician's office, etc). AND it's not against the law to take some time for yourself even post baby.
Best wishes!
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As a member, I find the different boys' looks and quirks to be endearing (but I totally heart teenagers). Here are these kids, each with his own personality, working together to do their priesthood duty. My assessment of our young men is pretty much the norm in our ward. We love our youth! And hey, youth will be, well, youthful.
I don't think the haircut you posted is immodest or inappropriate. It's a fun tradition with your friends on your team and doesn't take away from your duties as a priesthood holder.
Best wishes to you, and your team!
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isolated from the rest of the world. They really don't want to mingle with others. Not exactly an example for a church that should have a desire to grow its membership.
1847 anyone? I think Jeffs is an evil man. That said, I see what SS is saying. Throwing up our hands and wondering how those deluded people could follow that man is little different from how people wonder about us LDS. We give a great deal of money to an organization that will not open its books even to its donors. Some of you will disagree, but many of our leaders have been flawed (not to the degree of raping little girls, but flawed nonetheless). Early on, people left everything they had, risking death of themselves and loved ones, to follow a man into the wilderness. Whether the trust in these leaders is misplaced or not is irrelevant.
I think SS is just pointing out a flawed argument, not justifying anything done by the FLDS.
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Exactly. When my LDS friends decry the "removal of God from schools" I ask them if they really want the government/school/teacher defining God for their children. Let the school teach math, and let me teach my children about God how I want to.
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It's a dictionary smackdown!
This one is from Dictionary.com.mod·es·ty
[mod-uh-stee]
noun, plural -ties. 1. the quality of being modest; freedom from vanity, boastfulness, etc.
2. regard for decency of behavior, speech, dress, etc.
3. simplicity; moderation.
I'd just like to point out that how one dresses is just a part, and not the primary part, of the definition.
Is this one of those things like "virtue"? When I was YW president, and we had a lesson on "virtue", I pointed to the YW values posted on the wall. I told the girls that each of those things is a virtue. But when they hear a church leader talk about "virtue", what they really mean is sexual purity. It's a code.
To quote radio darling Rush Limbaugh, words mean things. When we appropriate words and shift their meanings to more-narrow definitions, we run the risk of misunderstandings and ignorance.
There's also the difference between standards and principles, but that's for another day.
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I don't think there's anything inherently immodest about showing one's shoulders, male or female.Do you consider men who wear sleeveless shirts/tank tops to be immodest? Obviously if there are garments underneath they shouldn't be shown, but what about youth. Young women are told to cover up their shoulders, what about men? Just curious at your opinions.
tap..tap..tap is this thing on?
Let's talk about modesty without talking about clothes and sex.
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I think they ought to do away with prayers in government settings (schools, courts, city councils, etc). It's problematic and divisive. Nothing prevents government officials or other individuals from praying on their own, but including prayer in public ceremonies (governmental, not open-to-the-public events hosted by non-government groups/individuals) is hard to do without violating the Constitution.
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It's a frustrating task to find the culprit!
It's my understanding that an immune response to a virus can also cause hives. My daughter gets a rash if you just look at her funny, and sometimes she'll break out in pretty severe hives as she recovers from a seemingly-unrelated virus.
Best wishes - I'm sure you're very anxious for your princess to get some relief!
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To be honest I am very surprised at the level of offense here. The overall point is that we have been told to be modest. I commend you for encouraging women to do so. I think that many of the points made may seem a little off, but the concept is true. Why can't we just all agree that many women dress immodestly, it is hard for men to deal with, and that 1. men should encourage women to be modest rather than encourage immodesty and 2. women should not feel like they have to conform and be immodest to fit in.
While I agree in theory, modesty is about much more than clothing, and isn't just a worldly-women-lead-helpless-men-astray issue.
Why is modesty speech always aimed at the women?
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If dressing modestly protects women from lechers, how is it that a sleeping, 80-year-old grandmother in my neighborhood was sexually assaulted?
Your behavior and strident framing of the issue may be causing a disconnect between the message you intend to send (I respect you too much to look at you when you're not all covered up), and the message received (He's ignoring me/judging me/finding me unworthy of communication).
I think the Holy Ghost is more influenced by what's on our inside...rather, the Holy Ghost remains the same but it's we who are able to tune in or not, based on what's going on in our hearts.Even the behavior of the Holy Ghost is influenced by what we wear.
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That horse is on Newspaper Rock. While it's difficult to date petroglyphs, that image is believed to be no older than 2,000 years but could be much more recent; it appears that the images were added over a long span of time.
Working Mothers...
in Parenting
Posted
It's a false dichotomy. A woman can work AND be a great mom. Why does it have to be one or the other?