2 Nephi 4:5-6

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Reference Search: 2 Nephi 4:5-6

5 But behold, my sons and my daughters, I cannot go down to my grave save I should leave a blessing upon you; for behold, I know that if ye are brought up in the way ye should go ye will not depart from it.

6 Wherefore, if ye are cursed, behold, I leave my blessing upon you, that the cursing may be taken from you and be answered upon the heads of your parents.

Quotes for Discussion

Answered Upon the Heads of Your Parents

Not long after we were married, we built our first home….The first of many trees that I planed was a thornless honey locust….It was so supple that I could bend it with ease in any direction. I paid little attention to it as the years passed. Then one winter day,…I chanced to look out the window at it. I noticed that it was leaning to the west, misshapen and out of balance….I went out and braced myself against it as if to push it upright. But the trunk was now nearly a foot in diameter….It seemed to say, “You can’t straighten me. It’s too late. I’ve grown this way because of your neglect, and I will not bend.” Finally in desperation I took my saw and cut off the great heavy branch on the west side. The saw left an ugly scar, more than eight inches across….I had cut off the major part of the tree, leaving one branch growing skyward. More than half a century has passed since I planted that tree….The other day I looked again at the tree. It is large. Its shape is better….But how serious was the trauma of its youth and how brutal the treatment I used to straighten it….When it was first planted, a piece of string would have held it in place against the forces of the wind….I have seen a similar thing, many times, in children whose lives I have observed. The parents who brought them into the world seem almost to have abdicated their responsibility. The results have been tragic. A few simple anchors would have given them the strength to withstand the forces that have shaped their lives. Now it appears it is too late.

Gordon B. Hinckley, Ensign, Nov. 1993, p. 59

Recent research on the development of a child’s brain has revealed new insights into how and when a child learns. I quote from a recent study: “From birth, a baby’s brain cells proliferate wildly, making connections that may shape a life-time of experience. The first three years are critical” (J. Madeleine Nash, Time, Feb. 3, 1997, 49)….The years from birth to age 10 are the peak years for acquiring the language that will become the foundation for understanding future knowledge and truth….It is an ideal time for parents to read to their children from the scriptures. They will begin to learn the language of the scriptures….One Primary leader shared…that she and her husband read the scriptures to their children—ages 2, 3, and 4—every night before they go to bed….I must admit I questioned that children so young could understand the language of the scriptures….She said after the first week the language was not an issue. The children love reading together and feeling the Spirit, and it’s amazing how much they understand. A very young child’s potential for learning and understanding is far greater than we tend to believe. The exciting possibility is that while children are learning new words daily, they can learn the language of the scriptures. In time, through the guidance of parents and teachers, they will grow in their understanding that Heavenly Father is speaking to them through the scriptures, that the scriptures can help them find answers to their problems.

Anne G. Wirthlin, Ensign, May 1998, pp. 9-10

The measure of our success as parents…will not rest solely on how our children turn out….

It is not uncommon for responsible parents to lose one of their children, for a time, to influences over which they have no control.

Boyd K. Packer, Ensign, May 1992, 68

Parents haven’t measured up to their responsibilities. It is evident. A nation will rise no higher than the strength of its homes. If you want to reform a nation, you begin with families, with parents who teach their children principles and values that are positive and affirmative and will lead them to worthwhile endeavors. That is the basic failure that has taken place in America….Parents have no greater responsibility in this world than the bringing up of their children in the right way…

Gordon B. Hinckley, Ensign, Nov. 1996, pp. 48-49

Though the parents are not always charged with the failures of their children, we are sure that many times the failures of the children could be charged to the parents….We realize that there are times when belligerent sons and daughters may draw upon themselves the condemnation, having totally ignored and failed all the teachings that have been given them. But we the parents cannot escape the responsibility that is ours of training our children….As we think of these young people who rebel against their parents and society, we wonder, have you held your family prayers with regularity? Do you have your family home evenings regularly? Are your children taught to be faithful and true? Most parents protect their children with shelter for their comfort, tender care and medicine for their illnesses, clothes for their looks and comfort, and food for their taste and growth, but what do they do for their souls?

Spencer W. Kimball, Tokyo Area Conference Report, Aug. 1975, pp. 38-39

The Lord has given us the answer. It is so simple that many people cannot see it. Let every family fortify itself against the tough and corrupt and godless world by methodically and determinedly teaching the children in regular, devout family prayers—night and morning every day—and in all Church programs and loyalties, and in the home evenings where fathers and mothers teach and train their children in all the ways of the Lord. Most people are largely the result of their home environment, good or bad. As Lehi said, on the brink of the grave, to his children, “I know that if ye are brought up in the way ye should go, ye will not depart from it.” (2 Ne. 4:5). Our conclusions must therefore be taking life at its best and life at its worst; the difference seems to be the catalyst of love and family solidarity.

Spencer W. Kimball, Manchester Area Conference Report, Aug. 1971, p. 82

There are parents who say: We will let our children grow to manhood and womanhood and choose for themselves. In taking this attitude parents fail in the discharging of a parental responsibility….The Father of all mankind expects parents…to assist him in shaping and guiding human lives.

David O. McKay, in Conference Report, April 1955, 27