Lindy Posted July 17, 2005 Report Posted July 17, 2005 Another one of those emails I had to share with you..... "What if the Book of Mormon had been written by Dr. Seuss?" Author: Unknown Nephi: Of goodly parents I was born; I've never drunk, I've never sworn; This is Lehi, he's my dad; Laman, Lemuel, they are bad; And who is this? Why this is Sam; Yes, this is Sam; Sam: Sam I am Laman: That Sam I am, that Sam I am; I do not like that Sam I am Sam: In a tent, my father dwelt Laman: And it's so hot, I think I'll melt Lemuel: Our father's brain is out of whack Laman: Yeah, it's too hot, I'm going back Lehi: Then go and get the plates my dear Laman: On second thought, I'm staying here Nephi: You said you'd leave and go away; Now all you want to do is stay? Lemuel: That Nephi always gets his way Laman: Here we are in this damp cave Sam: We would not be here if you'd behave Nephi: I will go and I will do; There's the angel, that's my cue Laban's had too much to drink; Now he'll lose his head, I think Nephi: Look what I found, a brother from the quorum Sam: We will take him home, we will call him Zoram Lemuel: Oh great, another pathetic life form Laman: Our gold and silver we have spent; I do not like it in this tent Lemuel: I cannot read the Liahona; I must have drunk too much Corona Laman: We hate it here, we have no lives Lehi: Then go back to the city and get some wives Lehi: A tree, a tree, I see a tree; The fruit is white, the fruit is free; A floating building, could it be? Why do they laugh and stare at me? Laman, Lemuel, come and see Laman: We will not eat your precious fruit Lemuel: We will not wear a tie and suit Laman: We will not help you build your boat Lemuel: We do not think that it will float Laman: No not this boat, it will not float; Not even in a shallow moat; I do not care what Nephi wrote Lemuel: We will not eat your fruit I say Laman: We will not eat it on a tray Lemuel: And we won't eat it in a tent; Not even if your clothes you rent Laman: We'd rather have a can of spam L & L: We will not eat it, Sam I am Sam: You do not like it, so you say; Try it, try it, and you may Try it and you may I say Laman: Sam, if you will let us be, We will try it, you will see -------------------------------------- edited: Sorry if the above offends any soft hearts.....not my intention ... I found it humorous ....but that is just me. Quote
Shawn Posted July 17, 2005 Report Posted July 17, 2005 I think I like this version better than the original. Quote
john doe Posted July 17, 2005 Report Posted July 17, 2005 Originally posted by Shawn@Jul 16 2005, 09:58 PM I think I like this version better than the original. Let me guess, it's because it's written more for your age and reading skill level? Quote
pushka Posted July 18, 2005 Report Posted July 18, 2005 Teehee...I agree with Shawn I'm afraid...much more amusing! Quote
Guest lt Posted July 18, 2005 Report Posted July 18, 2005 Shawn, I wouldnt expect anything else from you because all of your posts have sounded anti...... There are somethings in life that I can joke about, but scriptures are not one of them . This just truly hurts my heart to read it, I wonder how many wasteful hours it took to come up with it? I think I will stick to the saturday morning Calvin and Hobbs Quote
Jason Posted July 18, 2005 Report Posted July 18, 2005 This just truly hurts my heart to read it, I wonder how many wasteful hours it took to come up with it? I don't think the author of this intended it to be disrespectful, LaurelTree. Quote
Shawn Posted July 20, 2005 Report Posted July 20, 2005 Shawn, I wouldnt expect anything else from you because all of your posts have sounded anti...... There are somethings in life that I can joke about, but scriptures are not one of them . This just truly hurts my heart to read it, I wonder how many wasteful hours it took to come up with it? I think I will stick to the saturday morning Calvin and Hobbs -------------------- Sisterhood It is the security a woman feels in knowing that another woman understands and cares. Laureltree Since you say I sound "anti," would you define what this means? IJA, Shawn Quote
Guest lt Posted July 20, 2005 Report Posted July 20, 2005 If you make a post with a sincere question that great ! but "most" come in here asking rediculouse and stupid questions just to get peoples goats...thats all i'm saying...I hope you are being sincere.........thats all Quote
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