Howdy

[misterearp]

Howdy, y'all.

My wife of ten years informed me a few days ago that she wanted a divorce. We married in the temple, have a four year old daughter, and I thought she would be my eternal companion. There were lots of problems in our marriage that, no matter how hard I tried to resolve, I could not.

Then, two days ago, she shipped out to go on involuntary orders to Afghanistan. She's in the Navy.

What's worse, we're massively in debt.

I'm totally in over my head and have no idea how to deal with all this. I want to move on with my life, but I'm shackled to my debt, to my failed marriage, and just to really confuse things, I need to be there for my wife to support her and encourage her through this most difficult challenge of her life.

No one except our bishop in our ward knows our situation. I can't share the news with my ward because if I do, I jeopardize my housing arrangements. (It's complicated.) So I came here for support from my church extended family.

Well, nice to meet you folks. I hope to gain some perspective from y'all.

[ryanh]

Welcome.

That is an crazy and unfortunate set of circumstances you are facing. So, the deployment call came, then she said she wants a divorce just before shipping out? Is that right? I wonder if she was just overwhelmed and lashing out.

[Maya]

Welcome bro. Sad news... maybe she changes her mind while out there. You are taking care of the girl ... right? I hope you can find a way to pay the depts nd start over again. Question is are you going to give up or try one more time? I am from Norway, so if you pm me I can at least listen.

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[richardheaton]

A similar set of events befell me in 1985. The best advice I got was that if I did the right things, it would all work out. I know that this is hard to believe, but it worked very well for me. Two other things worked: I reread Job; many old friends came to visit me and were very supportive. Additionally, my mother was very supportive, as would my father have been had he not been deceased.

At the time Ronald Reagan was president (he also was divorced), and one of the general authorities of the church pointed out that rain falls on the just and the unjust. What matters is how we deal with the rain. For me and many others I have known, all has worked out very well, indeed. I wish you the very best.

[Dr T]

I'm sorry to hear that news sir. Welcome to this site. I hope u find what you're looking for. :)

[misterearp]

Thanks for all the supportive comments. I know things will eventually get better; it's just hard to see that far off day from where I stand now.