I'm sorry, I'm trying, but I hate Christmas


slamjet
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You know what stood out to me the most that made me read your post? The words "I'm trying." For what is worth, the Lord does see that, in spite of all of the hardships that you listed. He focuses on what is good about you and your life still. And I think the best advice I could possibly offer you is in the simple words - keep trying. And as hard as it is sometimes, try to focus on the good stuff. Even if it's just waking up in the morning. By that, you're given the chance to try again :)

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I am curios to know what you do for work and if you have any physical limitations?

Some times prayer can answer your issues like mine. I remember once, my truck died on a very very busy road in the big city. In this large city, you would be lucky to cross some one you know with such a big population. Well, as I sit in my truck trying to start it, I slumped onto my steering wheel and said "Please help me!" at that very second, I heard my name yelled on the opposite side of the street. It was one of my members in his car yelling at me if I needed help. I looked up and said wow, wow, what are you doing here! he was just passing though the area and saw me stuck in heavy traffic. To this day, I still cannot believe that happened.

I think you need to think back think hard and think about your current situation and how to get out of it. If your size is a disadvantage, turn it into a advantage. I am sure there is a job waiting for you out there. Just keep trying and use all available resources to help you out.

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