What to expect with church discipline.

[Zep]

I have recently learned that my son had been excommunicated and then baptized again after the year waiting period. He has now told me that he is getting divorced, which is heartbreaking. He then confided in me that as he was going through the formal discipline, he only admitted to a portion of sin and kept some back fearing that it would end his marriage. He was also thinking that he was repentant

and those sins would be forgiven with baptism. Now that he is getting divorced and isn't concerned about holding a marriage together he has become worried that those un confessed sins may not have been forgiven with baptism.

I dont know what to tell him. Any thoughts on this?

Thanks.

[PolarVortex]

"You can cheat others, but you cannot cheat yourself... or God."

 

I think you should support your son's decision to worry about this and to stay oriented toward the Church.  Other people might deal with this issue simply by leaving the Church altogether.  So your son is starting to do something noble and praiseworthy here.

 

However, I cannot think of any situation where keeping unconfessed sin secret is the winning strategy in the long run, and where refusing to make amends (except when doing so would injure others), including amends to yourself, would bring the most blessings.

 

I hope your son thinks of his bishop and church leaders more as healers than as judges.  If I am sick and I go to my doctor, I'm going to tell him every symptom I have.  Refusing to be honest with a doctor may have some short-term benefits (e.g., a government worker with a security clearance refuses to disclose feelings of depression out of fear of losing the clearance and a job), but in the long run it could injure you very badly.  Same with refusing to be honest with the people who can help heal you from the sickness of sin.

 

Unless your son's past acts are extremely unusual (and I don't have all the data here, so I don't want to speak in absolutes), you could try to persuade him that unconfessed sin may hurt him very badly in the long run, and that this alone is reason for dealing with it now.

 

Best wishes,

Polar

 

(By the way, the quote at the top was from a movie about nuns.  I altered it slightly to make it more applicable here... the original quote was, "You can cheat your sisters, but you cannot cheat yourself... or God.")

[NeuroTypical]

Now that he is getting divorced and isn't concerned about holding a marriage together 

 

Wait - how do you know he isn't concerned about holding a marriage together?

 

From my perspective, your actions should be driving by the best interests of any children involved.  

Edited September 14, 2014 by NeuroTypical