NeuroTypical

Now they've just gone too far, and are in open apostasy against all good and righteous things in the world. Kidding aside, this is a decent article.

Yep - you see the seriousness of picking your boundary and enforcing it. Is the behavior intolerable or isn't it? You get to pick the answer. If she continues the intolerable behavior, what's the consequence? You get to pick the answer. Divorce? Counseling? She must cut up the credit card? Will she agree to the consequence or won't she? If she doesn't, what will you do? No easy answers here. But if you don't pick clear answers for yourself and then follow through, you're asking for more of the same.

Saturday lunch: Teen daughter: Mamma, I need you to take me to Area51 for the run. Mamma: Daddy: Not until you prove to me you can Naruto run. Teen daughter [posting on facebook]: My mom just said she would drive us all to area 51. Who's coming with?

Losing trust in a spouse is hard - sorry to hear you're going through it. Something important to understand, is that she needs to regain your trust if she wants it back. And that will require her ploughing to the bottom of her own crap on why she's been doing these things all this time. Not everyone wants to do that. For your part, I'd suggest you start thinking healthy about what lost trust means to you. What boundaries will you put into place for future behavior from her? What consequences will happen if she blows past them? Is she willing to hear you out on them? Stuff like this can kill a marriage, or get fixed, or get tolerated. Much is on her, much is also on you.

GAAAAH! Curse you, CBS All-Access-Pay-Monthly-to-watch-TV! Curse you with something very Klingon! StarTrek: Discovery (moving into season 3) StarTrek: Picard (now with sassy 7 of 9 finally not in her bodysuit) StarTrek: ShortTreks (like ST, but short) StarTrek: Lower Decks (new animated show, will it stink?) Fine. You win. I'll pay your stupid monthly subscription thing in order to watch all this. I am not happy.

My wife had a friend. One day she found out we were Mormon, and she actually ducked her head and took some steps backwards as if she expected us to attack her or something. My wife didn't know what to make of it. Anyway, friend also did petsitting and was taking care of our dogs. When we got back, friend was very nervous - apparently one of our dogs had gotten out and run around the neighborhood for a few hours, before finally getting caught. Friend was worried we'd be mad. My wife got a very serious look on her face, and said "Well, I'm glad you caught her, because it's against our religion for you to lose our dog." The friend looked sad and anxious for a full three seconds - then it finally dawned on her and she finally laughed and relaxed. 

My wife's grandpa has a "I was sitting on a barstool and was knocked off of it by a voice saying 'why hast thou abandoned me?' conversion story. My wife has a "I was given a miraculous vision of the temple at one of the darkest moments of my life" conversion story. I have a "I studied and prayed and received an unmistakable, powerful, undeniable, absolutely real answer via a sense I never realized I had" conversion story. My old bishop had a "I've never felt anything like what other people describe as a spiritual experience. I'm a chemistry teacher, and the reality of God is made manifest as I study the periodic table of the elements, or complicated chemical processes, from an experiment in the lab to watching a sunset." conversion story. Another old bishop had a "I was praying hard about the things that worried me the most, and heard a voice plain as day saying "you're all right. I'll take care of you" conversion story.

Man, if I had a nickel for every time someone stayed on to help me with the calling I just vacated, I, well, I wouldn't have any nickles at all. Kind of you to do it.

Yep, my dad was very much a product of his times. He lived to see America accept things he never accepted. Won the battle against global oppression, lost the battle to keep women in the kitchen. One of the last great male chauvenist pigs. He reveled in the title.

Quite true. My dad's generation was still running the show in the '80's, and my dad was still openly ticked off that they let blacks fight in WWII. And ticked off they let women into the workforce while he was off fighting. He died before they let women into the military - but I'm pretty sure I heard him roll over in his grave and swear when the news came out.

I have heard that psychopaths who are interested in, well, being good instead of evil, can find good employment as a surgeon or vet or mortician or guy who does autopsies. Cutting into people is easier when you don't have a bunch of empathy in the way.

Gottman rocks. Scientist/researcher first, marriage therapist second. Very experiment- and data-driven.