bonanzafan

Sunday in my YSA ward in--you guessed it--Provo, we had an "experts" panel on dating. It was a real turn off seeing the flippancy of one woman, while her husband stoically took it. I felt so bad for him having to hear her portray their experience from her still arrogant perspective. It's a common thing I've seen often in so many families. Men are now property of women. Just the other day at Target in Orem, a young couple was in line behind me and the tone of the wife's voice toward her husband made me sick. You would have thought he was about to rob a bank the way she jumped all over him for putting the groceries on the conveyor belt in poor fashion, according to her. He quietly, and in the manner to be imagined a slave to portray, apologized to her and did as he was told. Oh how the pendulum swings and hits the more docile party. Isn't it too bad that mildness and kindness and sincerity really aren't celebrated in common forethought the way we praise ourselves for doing so? That shallow wall of hers, that women are entitled to the perfect man, is every reason you and your daughters don't get asked out. It's terrifying and humiliating to have to play that game. Do you wonder why you're all getting divorced ten years into marriage? Your husband's porn problem is just a smokescreen symptom....When did you turn off the bridezilla act and leave it off? My experience: grew up with an abusive father and a mother who resented him for that and projected it onto her sons. Every girl I've dated since my mission has had cases of sexual abuse from a brother in her childhood. More than 75% of them have been physically abusive toward me. The last one shared me with a married man she had been sexually involved with but was "only good friends with" while she and I dated. I am feeling so defeated (and have been for the last 15 years) in trying to keep listening and trying to find a girl who respects people instead of trying to take from them. Women, you need to be sensitive to who's listening instead of who won't. And the whole Twilight craze is nothing different than celebrated emotional pornography warned of by PROPHETS.

there's a lot of badgering toward men for watching it. do women watch it? obviously, i'm not asking this question for men to answer. i just feel like men are picked on and women aren't because they refuse to face public humiliation.

being poor and in school, my parents have helped me quite a bit financially over the past six months. this is an amazing thing for them to do. my thoughts have not resolved how to handle tithing on this. they have paid bills and fixed my car and given me petty cash for my expenses as well. can you point me to articles and talks that discuss this?

I've met a girl who has no serious transgressions, as I do. How should I approach her regarding my mistakes against the law of chastity? I'm so embarrassed even though I have resolved things with the appropriate prescribed order of repentance. thanks.

this is ridiculous. i wish i didn't ask. some of you have horrible attitudes and need to go to church, it seems.

this is not "all things". this is one thing, and the church has given counsel on it. i'm not trying to find your opinion, but the church's position on it.

with all due respect, if you are not going to answer the question, would you please refrain from commenting, unless you have a specific url to direct me to. thanks.

i know the church, per pres kimball, sent something out in the 80's that renounced the practice of oral sex. what are the "okay's" and "not okay's" for sex between husband and wife?

thank you guys. thank you for your advice and warmth. i really appreciate it.

i had a girlfriend who was having sex with me. she started seeing this other guy, her home teacher, during times while i was busy with work and school...while she and i were doing all these things. i thought we were a couple. now they are together. while he was gone for three weeks she and i still saw each other. should i tell him? i hurt so bad. i want girls like her to not be doing this to guys. her last relationship, previous to me, was with a married member of the church who she worked with; and this relationship did not completely end until she and i had been dating for three months. also, this new boyfriend has his mission call and is scheduled to leave in three months.

the three s's of appropriate times to remove garments: sex swimming sports talk to your bishop if you have questions on specifics for this

how much cleavage is appropriate? some? none? i'm asking this sincerely. i have a friend (a girl) who is struggling finding a modest swimsuit. she says "modest swimsuits are only made for skinny girls with no breasts, so i will wear what i want. if i had to follow the standards to the 't' i would be dressed like a nun and never be able to swim."

I'm in college. My parents gave me money to help pay my bills. Should I pay tithing on this?

I am struggling to keep the law of chastity with a girl I've been dating for a few months. I have met with priesthood leaders and have even had a bishop's court. I don't know how to change what's going on. I'm realizing that I have submitted my will to Satan and cannot break myself free of this. I'm a returned missionary. I grew up in a family of all strong members of the church. I'm about to lose even more privileges. I feel like my weakness is that I'm so lonely inside and so is she. I don't feel like we are right for each other, emotionally and personality-wise. We're just two lonely people doing dumb things. Can you help me with your opinions, please? Please. I'm just so sorry to be where I am.

i've been dating a girl for a few weeks now. she is in my ward. she is "legal" in her level of standards, but not tight about keeping them strong. her modesty is borderline and her conversation is sometimes questionable...among other things that seem to push the envelope. she often says "that's just how i am," and fights me to the end when i say some of these things make me uncomfortable about her behavior. she doesn't listen when i tell her how i feel, or rather, she hears and agrees, but then pays no head after the conversation. i haven't felt attracted to a girl in a while, but now this... any advice? thanks.

is it appropriate to reveal and apologize for past sins, particularly sexual sins (that have been sincerely repented of with priesthood help), to a significant other who you'd like to marry, in the form of apology? i feel like if i want a girl to be my wife, i should be honest and sincere with her. regarding these things, i've always felt that i robbed my future wife of experiences that were to be hers and mine together. if you have experienced either side of this, i'm interested in what you would have done, or done different. thanks in advance.

when people say that, i can't help but discredit their testimony in the importance of their lesson. they might as well be saying, i would only come do this if i was formally called by god to do it. most people don't care who or what's being taught, though. she's safe saying anything. her mistakes can't ruin the church.

since i've been home from my mission (4 years ago) i've had trouble sleeping. at least one saturday a month someone in my ward is moving and wants us there at 8am. i can't usually fall asleep until 3am. if i don't sleep enough at least one to two days a week i get sick with a cold or sinus infection for two weeks. any advice on how to handle this? i feel bad...i think people deserve to know they're worth helping and most of the guys in the ward (most wards) just don't really ever help at all.

i have a friend who is jewish, raised jewish in israel to be a rabbi. he converted to the church. his understanding of the book of mormon is so deep. it was written by their people.

wow. this is great insight. thanks for doing this.

what are your favorite activities that you've done for family home evening in a young single adult ward?

rhino skin, eh? looking a little defensive there. maybe you are wearing your polite self out too much at work???

church is still a lot different than work.

sorry, i'm not going to church for money.

just to clarify on a few things: i don't think i said that i'd stop going to church over this. no, my idea wasn't dumb. it was just another idea for a fhe activity (have you ever been to one? they're rarely anything "normal".)...if you re-read my original post, you'll see that the harassment began before that part. i'm thinking that the problem is competing with someone who's been over-validated his whole life because he's an athlete. some of your comments helped me see that. thanks for all the good advice, folks.