Good LDS Men

[Truegrits]

I am just hoping to meet someone that will respect me and actually want to be with me.

That would be a wonderful start to ANY relationship.

Hope you find that for yourself.

[Misshalfway]

I have thought that it would be nice. She absolutely refuses to spend anymore time then is necessary with me though. She can barely even look me in the eye. I am sure she has my picture up on a dartboard.

At this point I am sure that only a miracle will change her mind. She has stopped keeping her temple covenants so that would have to change before I would even consider it. But I would consider it just for the boys sake. I am not in love with her though so that would have to change. And she would have to stop hating my guts. Stranger things have happened I know, but at this point I am just hoping to meet someone that will respect me and actually want to be with me.

Well, you are a good man. I am wishing the best for you!!!! Even if you do like 80's music!

[Fiannan]

Hey, anyone out there know any single 20-somethings that you could try to hook up Checkerboy with?:)

[Palerider]

I can absolutely see how a young (even an older) female might be embarrassed and unwilling to talk to a Bishop, or any male, on the subject.

So, statistically, the numbers on female 'participation' may not be accurate.

I can see the young, male or female, being curious and checking a site out; I am not convinced however, that females are "returning" viewers.

Satisfying curiosity, yes; returning, no.

Who is Jenna Jamison?

I agree with you on that.....this is why its so important to have a great Relief Society Pres and good Young Women Pres....they can help alot in these areas....when LDS social services would attend our training meetings....always talked about internet porn and the majority was from men.

[Palerider]

Well that's interesting because I read an article about teens in Utah and the one thing that caught my eye was that while male teens were more likely to have visited porn sites than females (not really a huge statistical difference though) females who visited them were more likely to go back. That indicates regular use. And please, don't say that this probably was due to non-members being the ones giving these answers.

Perhaps most female LDS would never dream of telling a male official of the Church that they were viewing porn. Maybe they rationalize in many ways why it's not as bad for a female to view this sort of thing. Tell you what, ask a group of young females who Jenna Jamison is -- bet you'll be surprised with how many know the answer. And before anyone makes any hasty judgements on me I can just say that the reason I know is due to working with someone who asked me to watch a debate she did on O'Reily..

all of my examples are from the trenches.....

[Fiannan]

all of my examples are from the trenches.....

Perhaps, but while I generally rely upon studies to make my points here I have to offer anecdotal evidence as well (as your's are). My impression is that many women in the Church would rather not talk about such issues with men they do not know personally. I have personally known female members with a rather liberal view on what is appropriate to view on TV or the internet and I have known plenty of non-member females who have liberal attitudes on such things. Also, the studies indicate that most women involved in such activities are not chronic users so they probably aren't going to call themselves addicts, unless they belong to a religion that presents use as automatic abuse. Then again, who knows, even the 10 Commandments doesn't prohibit a woman from coveting a man, and there is no punishment in the OT for a certain other activity often presented in internet sites, so maybe women are programmed differently, who knows? Definitions and perceptions in the mind of the individual will determine if he or she will see ANY action as good, bad or something in-between.

[Palerider]

I know for a fact that alot of Sisters would not feel comfortable talking to a male about the things you stated. Often times one of them would approach my wife and tell her they needed to talk with me and that they were afraid to. This is why I always tried to use my Relief Society President as a 3rd councilor. She can work wonders in this area. They may not feel comfortable approaching me, but they might feel like they can speak with her. Or if I had sensed something might be wrong with a sister I would ask the RS President to speak with her first.

[Palerider]

One of my best friends (who also used to be LDS) always felt that certain things were just none of the bishop's business. She always thought it was creepy when he'd ask.

and from what my wife has always told me....if not done in the right way...yea...it does feel creepy....the Bishop has to earn that respect from sisters....he just can't ask questions right away and get answers....if he doesn't listen to what she is saying....he wil earn that respect....just my opinion...:)