lost87 Posted September 4, 2009 Report Share Posted September 4, 2009 My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship and visit eachother every weekend or so, as much as possible. We have struggled with the law of chastity in the past, and want to fix all of that now. It is inevitable that we stay together on our visits because we live so far apart, so with that in consideration, what things can we do to help each other stay clean? We are both committed to repenting, but it is still tempting every now and then. we can't get married right now as it is impossible for either of us to move. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bini Posted September 4, 2009 Report Share Posted September 4, 2009 Nothing good ever happens after ten :] Yes, that's exactly what my parents used to tell me when I was dating boys. Ten o'clock was my curfew and no later! I'm guessing you're quite a bit older than 16 though :] BUT it's still a good rule to refrain from being alone with the opposite sex in the late hours of the night. Something as innocent as "snuggling" often times turns into "other" things. So, be assertive to that. Maybe do an activity together and then call it a night :] You close your door and he'll close his. If I think of anything else I'll post again :] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwen Posted September 5, 2009 Report Share Posted September 5, 2009 if you are a church member then there are places you can stay. my husband and i dated over a long distance. he would always make arrangements with a local church member that i could stay with. some of the i met for the first time staying at their house, he would go with me and introduce us. it was never a bad experience and it keeps you out of trouble when you want to get in early enough not to be an inconvenience to the ppl you are staying with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bini Posted September 5, 2009 Report Share Posted September 5, 2009 Gwen's suggestion is waaay better than mine :] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted September 5, 2009 Report Share Posted September 5, 2009 my good friend, i think that if you are both commited, then spending time with each other to re-inforce that commitment is paramount, in order to strengthen each other in this. cant you talk on the phone? i have had great intiment experiences with lovers, and friends, via the telephone. besides the voices being shared, the heart is expressed, dont you think? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Islander Posted September 5, 2009 Report Share Posted September 5, 2009 My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship and visit eachother every weekend or so, as much as possible. We have struggled with the law of chastity in the past, and want to fix all of that now. It is inevitable that we stay together on our visits because we live so far apart, so with that in consideration, what things can we do to help each other stay clean? We are both committed to repenting, but it is still tempting every now and then. we can't get married right now as it is impossible for either of us to move.I suggest you both are in a lot more trouble than you realize. I also suggest that the relationship is not as strong as you think. But you may not know or even realize it since you are quite young. Beyond that, you do not need much to get married but a ring and a date. Your Bishop will be happy to make it official. Your attempt to sweep the situation under the rug will not help you as you are closer to a pregnancy than you imagine and then you will realize that it is a HUGE problem that may stay with you for a very long time. Rationalization is a very dangerous game.Either make arrangements to stay with older/widowed/single-female members or stay home until you can make other arrangements. Intimacy outside of marriage is intoxicating to the point of being able to cause an overdose. If you discuss this with your Bishop instead of here you will gain a whole different perspective. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StallionMcBeastly Posted September 5, 2009 Report Share Posted September 5, 2009 Good advice above. Focus on how you feel when you successfully resist temptation - and try to remember then whenever you are tempted again. How old are you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alana Posted September 5, 2009 Report Share Posted September 5, 2009 My self control has never been good enough that I could have a boy friend spend the night and something not happen. I bet you'd be surprised that you could find someone in the ward who would let your bf spend the night a night or two every few weeks. Seriously, being in a house alone, snuggling on the couch watching a movie.... and staying chaste? I'm simply not that strong of a person:) I also know people who through craigslist has found a couch to crash on for a few bucks a night when needed on a random basis. Maybe he needs to get a truck with a camper shell and he can just sleep in there... a few miles away from your house with cell phones turned off:P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lost87 Posted September 5, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 5, 2009 btw...im 21 and he is 25 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lost87 Posted September 7, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 7, 2009 so...my bf spent the weekend with me at my house with just the two of us and we were SOOOOO good all weekend! we didn't do anything bad! I know its only one weekend in the midst of many many not good ones, and that we need to still be ridiculously vigilant and cautious, but it really meant a lot to me that we made it these few days. Thanks for your support guys! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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