Guest shmrie Posted December 29, 2009 Report Share Posted December 29, 2009 alrighty, I figured since this is the youth forum, I should bring this quandary (is that spelled right?) here. This is probably a big cliché with all people my age, and this could be entirely in my head, but.... I definitely feel a disconnect with everyone else in young women. Part of it is that I'm a very strange person to begin with XD, but I think the biggest factor is that I've never gone to school with any of these other girls. All the other Laurels go to a different high school across town and I know the general attitude there is much different than at my school (theirs is kind of clique-ish, whereas mine is much more chill). I point that out mostly because it may be that they've been taught from socializing at their school to behave that way. However, I don't think that's a huge factor. I think what the biggest problem is, is that I just have no idea what they ever talk about. It's not like they leave me out, it's just that even when they go out of their way to include me, it's still really awkward (for instance, they may be complaining about some teacher and I'll be like "yeah, I hate teachers like that" and that's all good and happy, but it's definitely not the same as being able to name the subtle oddities of said teachers). Sometime I'll just hang out with some of the younger girls, but if it's a laurel-only activity, can I get an extra helping of awkward? any feedback? or am I waaaaaay over-analysing this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
idahomommyof4 Posted December 31, 2009 Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 Hi and welcome to the forum! I mostly just kinda stay behind the scenes on this forum, but wanted to let you know that I can totally relate! Ok, granted I am 31 years old now, but when I was a laurel, it was really hard. And I even went to the SAME school as the girls I was in class with! I was very shy, however. I'm sure that had a LOT to do with it. One idea is you said you try to be involved in the conversation (good for you!!!--I would've had a hard time w/ doing that especially if I was at another school!), instead of just saying "I hate teachers like that", you could say that and add..."I have this awful teacher that does this...." and add to it. At that age, it's awkward for a lot of people to engage in conversation with someone they aren't familiar with their situation (family, school, etc.). Give them a chance, though. Try to force yourself to be MORE outgoing that you usually would. Start the conversation! Talk about who's on what reality shows right now that you like/dislike. Talk about your classes (likes/dislikes). Plans for the future (college, etc.). They are probably feeling a little awkward too about how to include you. Sorry for the rambling :) I hope that the YW make you feel welcome and that you feel more a part of the ward. Take care!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarnished Posted December 31, 2009 Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 I felt the same way when I was in YW. Our ward boundaries were large and because of that I was the only one my age who attended my high school, all the other girls went to other schools. Besides all that I was also rather odd. I ended up becoming friends with some of the younger girls, but also trying to get to know the other girls my age. It was difficult though because it was hard to get into the cliques. Idahomommy has some good advice. Try to make conversation with them, try to find ways to get to know them better. It is not easy but it makes the last bit of YW more enjoyable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bini Posted December 31, 2009 Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 I totally feel where you're coming from. I hated YW, seriously. In fact, I don't think I even made it to Laurels. After Mia Maids (wait.. is that what they're called?) I think I skipped out of there. But none of that helps you any. I guess my advice would be to initiate a girls' day out and do some fun stuff together, like lunch and a matinee movie or something? I think the worst thing you can do is small-talk about nonsense and BS with people because it's always obvious to them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annamaureen Posted December 31, 2009 Report Share Posted December 31, 2009 Others have offered advice already, but I just wanted to say that I know how you feel. I was an "unusual" teenager and, like you, didn't fit in with the other YW. Many of us have been there, and it doesn't last forever! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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