Guest LDSister Posted November 21, 2005 Report Share Posted November 21, 2005 My belief is that no one should tolerate abuse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BenRaines Posted November 21, 2005 Report Share Posted November 21, 2005 Verbal, Physical or otherwise. No excuse for abuse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason Posted November 21, 2005 Report Share Posted November 21, 2005 Originally posted by Tammy+Nov 21 2005, 01:55 PM--><!--QuoteBegin-Jason@Nov 21 2005, 01:40 PMThe abusive part would have been helpful...In this case, abuse is not to be tolerated. I stand corrected.←Jason,On second look--thanks Jason for this comment. I am not perfect but I do the best I can with my children. I have suffered a great deal.←You're welcome. Sounds from the previous post you've had a lot to deal with. I thought you were just being religiously snotty. I apologize and hope you can help your daughter understand that abuse is wrong (by anyone's standard). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammy Posted November 21, 2005 Report Share Posted November 21, 2005 Thanks Jason!! I mean it. I have had a lot to deal with and I am not perfect. I think perfect families are a myth. I use to think they were possible, but that was when I was a child and before my parents divorced and my sister decided to only communicate with me. I am the peacemaker and I try to do that with my family and others. Sometimes it keeps me from being able to look out for myself though. I spent some time in counseling after the kids left home and the counselor and I have tried to work out boundaries with my children in which I am protected and I can still love and support them. It is hard --I love them so much, but sometimes I can 't reach them. Self persevation takes over and I have the right to be happy and comfortable after all I have given them over the years. I can't dwell on their problems and let it affect my life. My meds are strong but not that strong. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jason Posted November 21, 2005 Report Share Posted November 21, 2005 Originally posted by Tammy@Nov 21 2005, 02:22 PMThanks Jason!! I mean it. I have had a lot to deal with and I am not perfect. I think perfect families are a myth. I use to think they were possible, but that was when I was a child and before my parents divorced and my sister decided to only communicate with me. I am the peacemaker and I try to do that with my family and others. Sometimes it keeps me from being able to look out for myself though. I spent some time in counseling after the kids left home and the counselor and I have tried to work out boundaries with my children in which I am protected and I can still love and support them. It is hard --I love them so much, but sometimes I can 't reach them. Self persevation takes over and I have the right to be happy and comfortable after all I have given them over the years. I can't dwell on their problems and let it affect my life. My meds are strong but not that strong. LOL←Depends on the medication I suppose!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Franken Posted November 22, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 22, 2005 K, no one really got what I was saying at first. When I said, "perfect family" I meant that obviously I know that there is no actual perfect family out there, but I'm wondering if anyone has one that doesn't have like a side of their family who aren't LDS or do things like drink and other such things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Josie Posted November 22, 2005 Report Share Posted November 22, 2005 We all have that side to our families, Franken, atleast all the ones I know of... I was only one in my family that was member for years. I waitted 40 years to see My mom baptised. Every wonderful, good family I know, in or out of the church, always has someone that is not quite at the level they would like for them to be. We don't stop loving them, we just love them more. I have heard BenRaines say many times, you love the person, not the wrongs they do. (I know I did not say it right Ben, but I got the idea across, lol). I think all of our families are far from perfect, because we as people are far from perfect. But we love each member just the same, even if we hate the sin.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
insertwittynamehere Posted November 22, 2005 Report Share Posted November 22, 2005 This in response to the initial post. I havent read any of the in between stuff so excuse me if this response if off topic now. Anyway... growing up in The Church as the only member in my household was tough. Every time I was at church, I would look around and admire how perfect they all were.. with their perfect kids and perfect families. I always saw the love and patience the parents had and their wonderful strength and testimonies and was often very jealous. I wanted my family to be like that so much.. I wished I could go to church with a family (instead of alone) and have family home evening and family prayer... then I met my best friend. She was part of one of those prominent perfect families and as I hung out around their house for years growing up, I realized they actually weren't perfect at all. However they seemed at church, it certainly wasnt the way they were at home. #1 - People have to be examples at church.. even moreso than at home and in their daily lives. People have expectations that are expected to be met. #2 - no one is perfect. Only Christ is and no matter how hard we try to reach that perfection in this life, it will never happen. I believe that Gordon B. Hinckley is perhaps the most perfect human alive right now and even he isnt perfect. #3 - one can NEVER know everything there is to know about another or another family. I am still learning things about my best friends family whom I've been around for 8 years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Franken Posted November 22, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 22, 2005 Like I said, it's not that I don't love the families any less because they aren't perfect, I just found it was interesting as I get to know people better that there always seems to be that part of the family. More so in some families than others but we all come from different backgrounds I suppose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Josie Posted November 22, 2005 Report Share Posted November 22, 2005 I am grateful to have a good family and be born of good parents, that I know loved me. My brothers are not members of the church, but they are good men and I love them and their families. My parents were not members of the church, as I said. My mother was baptized just over 4 years ago, and now the work has been done for both her and Dad. I feel it a priviledge to be sealed to these two wonderful people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
audie Posted November 23, 2005 Report Share Posted November 23, 2005 My mom and dad are both converts to the church. My dad's brother joined the church before he did (my dad was 30 when he was baptized). My mom joined in her 20s and her mom was later baptized. My parents meet later and were sealed in the temple and had my two brothers, my sister, and me. I'm in Texas and the rest of my family lives around the great lakes, so I hardly know them and none of them are members. My uncle, the one who is a member, is in his 60s and he is dating a girl that only sees dollar signs. Everyone but him can see that. We wish that he would date someone that is interested in him. No one would have guessed this if they had just meet us. My dad is the first con. my mom is 2nd con. in the young womens pre. my older brother is going to BYU, he went for a year right now he is on his mission, I go to BYU-I and am a primary teacher in my home ward until I go back in Jan. My brother is teachers pres. and an eagle scout, and my sister is a beehive and everyone gets her in the ward for babysitting. So my family my seem to be perfect. But in fact we are far from. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justlooking Posted November 24, 2005 Report Share Posted November 24, 2005 We are far from perfect, but we do leave alot of room for love, forgiveness, and caring. Then again I guess yes, we are perfect since we do leave alot of room for love forgiveness and caring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lindy Posted November 24, 2005 Report Share Posted November 24, 2005 Originally posted by Franken@Nov 22 2005, 12:35 AMLike I said, it's not that I don't love the families any less because they aren't perfect, I just found it was interesting as I get to know people better that there always seems to be that part of the family. More so in some families than others but we all come from different backgrounds I suppose.←I feel the same way you do Franken...you look at the "perfect" family at church...(or anywhere else) and as you get to know them....perfect ain't so perfect anymore. We find the human side of "perfection". And you know what? I always thought "perfect" was dull and boring....it was nice to see the human side of those I had always held on a pedestal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moroni Posted December 12, 2005 Report Share Posted December 12, 2005 no family is perfect but we are on the path to being perfect we should always love our family even if its not perfect Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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