advice for helping a Grandaughter

[teddyk]

How do I help her know that there is some thing to belief in , her parents sent,

her to me. (just across the street) it seems she mentioned to her parents,that

if anyone knows,it would be Grandpa. (her parents or work-workaholic's)

I have concerns about this as she is just 11 and I have loads of life ,

experience's.

All my grankids have ask me for advice, but this one is tuff,

for me.

She is a straight A student,the smart one , in all my years she may be the top,

brain in our tribe.Of all time,her IQ is off the chart.

She knows topic's I am just familiar with and takes to her own research on,

every thing,even history.and politics which the other kids just tolerate.

I thought I should include all of that^^above so you can help her better.

except I need to add to it a bit more,she has it in her head,and is strong when,

she says, she can not find the answer of what is there to belief in,

I know its not something to just brush off with a kid as bright and gifted,

as this.

As I suspect she has developed already at this tender age of 11 a strong,

philosophical belief structure,her Sunday school teacher has said many of the,

same thoughts as mine,even though I do not belong to the same church,

(Baptist) I make it a point to get to know the people, in my,

Granddaughter's life.

I am active like this with all my gran-kids. if you need more details I can give them.

I did not intend to take up the whole forum,but I am about to go bonkers,

not sure I am good enough,I have counciled many through the years.

But as you know it's tougher with some one you love.

[JudoMinja]

No matter how intelligent a person is, experience has more to teach. You have many years of personal experience under your belt. Your granddaughter is only eleven. She may be very gifted, very smart, very inquisitive, but there is no way she knows more than you. Life is the greatest teacher of all, and she has much more life to live.

Think of those things you have learned, from your vast life experiences, that she cannot learn from a book. Think of the affirmations you have received for your own faith. I am only twenty-three years old, and many have told me that I am wise beyond my years, that I am extremely intelligent, that I know so much... but I do not kid myself into believing I know everything. I turn to my elders for solidity and greater wisdom.

There are many subjects in which I know more than my parents and even my grandparents, but I still believe they know more than I do about life. Do not doubt the knowledge you have just because your granddaughter is so intelligent. Share with her what you believe in, and if you live up to those beliefs she will come to know that she can believe in them too.

[Dravin]

She may be very gifted, very smart, very inquisitive, but there is no way she knows more than you. Life is the greatest teacher of all, and she has much more life to live.

Even is she did somehow have a sum total of knowledge that was greater she still doesn't know the same things.

[rameumptom]

Help her to understand that some things cannot be learned from books, only enhanced by our study.

Can one trace where the wind comes from? No. But that doesn't mean we believe there is a source somewhere for that wind. Sometimes it requires the heart and mind to find things, or at least approximate it. She believes in atoms and molecules, not because she has seen them herself, but because of the testimony of scientists. So it is with spiritual things. Sometimes we have to begin by trusting the experts on spiritual things, such as the testimony of prophets and apostles in the Bible, or in the LDS church to also consider the testimonies of living prophets.

Tell her it requires research just as it does with anything she studies at school. Have her read in the Book of Mormon, Alma 32, which discusses gaining a testimony. Perhaps you can study it with her, as Alma gives us a scientific experiment to do with spiritual things. Break down his experiment (comparing God's word to a seed being planted in the heart and mind, and if it is good, it will begin to grow, but we still do not have a full knowledge - just as in science we are still learning new truths on practically everything).

[teddyk]

Thanks^^^every one who gave me a lot of good ideas. :) I worked in to my talk with her of not giving up on something to believe in from what you all advised. I did gain some ground. She is such a kind person,she was mad at God because it is hard for anyone at times to get your mind wrapped around the bad things that happen to good people.

It truns out a Lil girl she really got close with at summer camp passed awy from an illness

that was easily prevented (a poor kid) the two of them started taking food,an things to another poor family's,and saw this friend of hers place her own items to give away in gift box. My Grandaughter is this way from as for back as I can recall. Always bringing home stray or injured animals,people,you name it. she would find ways for helping out in the town. So her good friend dies an she is a bit up-set with God but I explained that way it is in the world and you have to study death more,and look at what God and his son said about it. Everything has a purpose and a season...she agreed to study it with some LDS pals she sometimes hangs out with. But the best friend she mention,is my Grand son :) he is a convert for four years in the LDS church..so I know he will,comfort her broken heart and show her how these bad things can not be allowed to get you down for good. She is going to get right soon now that she knows her assignment,death of a loved one is a tuff thing to deal with at any age.

Edited November 1, 2010 by teddyk

[Kerasene]

I think that if there is a way to show her your experiences in a way that may interest her then do that. Perhaps try talk to her on her level of understanding. I know that when I was younger, (I wasn't exactly the most smart, but I've been told I'm wise beyond my years), it was very difficult for me to believe in religion because it just didn't seem to work with my very strong philosphical beliefs. It's hard for a girl at that age to accept it when she knows that kind of thing. At that age, it's mainly a burden because there's nearly no one that understands what she does so she feels by herself. I know this because I was quite unaware of this until I had a deep discussion about it with my father (agnostic). He helped me understand myself and what I was aware of.

I wouldn't say that she's smarter than you, but having that awareness of everything makes the person, in this case your grand daughter very empathetic and understanding, well it did for me. Perhaps she's stubborn about your life experiences because she feels it doesn't relate to what she knows?

Hey, and don't go and say you're not good enough, God doesn't give us challenges that we can't overcome. I found that in my own time I saw how everyone at church seemed to be happy and enjoy life, a life full of love and a strong family atmosphere. I realised that I didn't have that and the answer of why came to me. It'll take some time, but it can be done.

Good luck. :)

[rameumptom]

Another thing to help your granddaughter is to help her understand that death is not a bad thing. We hate it, because we lose the close relationship with loved ones that pass on. However, our friends who die, whether early or later in life, are all redeemed by Jesus Christ's atonement. They will rejoice in the peace and joy given them. They no longer have to worry about sickness, disease, poverty, tragedy, etc. They are at peace.

So, while we miss them very much, it should bring us peace to know God is loving and caring for them. It should not make us angry at God. Someday, we will all return to God, and we'll then be able to see our loved ones and have a very happy reunion with them all.