June 14, 2011 - Distortion of family duties

[pam]

........a man’s righteous desire to act in his position as a leader in his family, if not righteously exercised, can lead him into self-righteousness, selfishness, dictatorship, and even brutality. A timely warning against this danger is the Lord’s blunt instruction that it is the “nature and disposition” of those who have a little authority to “exercise unrighteous dominion” (D&C 121:39). We must all heed the direction that priesthood authority must be exercised “by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned” (D&C 121:41).

By the same token, a woman’s righteous and appropriate desires to grow, to develop, and to magnify her talents—desires strongly reinforced by current feminist teachings—also have their extreme manifestations, which can lead to attempts to preempt priesthood leadership, to the advocacy of ideas out of harmony with Church doctrine, or even to the abandonment of family responsibilities.

Dallin H. Oaks - Our Strengths Can Become Our Downfall - Liahona May 1995

[Jennarator]

I can see how this could easily happen when circumstances cause a role reversal in who works outside the home and such. (As in my home.) This can be avoided with good communication and clear expectaions of each person. I have seen it happen when the female (when she is the breadwinner) decide that entitles her to lead the family.

Also if we keep in mind that tho the husband is the leader of the family he is to communicate with his family and, with his wife, seek guidence from Heavenly Father. This helps prevent him from unrightous dominion.

I have also seen many get upset that because the man is the leader and the woman must follow blindly. This, is not true. First the womans role is as imprortant, but different. That is important to keep in mind as well. Second, she is to be a helpmeet to her husband. They work together, neither can do it alone. (Well at least not very well, I tried the single parent thing for a while and it is HARD WORK!)

Oh what am I thinking?!? I should even try to add or clearify any of this. It is written so nicely already.

Please ignor what I wrote.

[pam]

No way Jenn. I like what you wrote. I agree with you that many women who are the breadwinners think that automatically gives them the right to lead the family. While she may be the financial person at the time..it doesn't take away from the responsibility of the husband to lead the family.