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Posted

Hey guys, I'm at a bit of a dilema here. Me and my girlfriend have been recently talking about kissing and weren't sure if it was ok. We agreed that since we're both 15 that we'd wait at least until we were 16. I was wondering what kind of views the church has on this (I'm not really familiar with them). So basically, do they Strongly discourage it, just sort of discourage, agree, neutral, do you guys know?

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Posted

My experience has been different people in the church interpret things differently so Person_1 can say "Kissing is bad" and Person_2 can say "Kissing is ok" and Person_3 can say "Kissing is ok, but no tongue kissing" so really you have to make that call yoursel.

Posted

Hmm... I can see what you mean. I've had some people tell me it's bad, some who say it's ok, and some who are about half and half like you said. I guess it really is just up to me... Hmm... I'll have to talk things over with her, thanks for the advice AFDaw.

Posted

The cheek and the forehead.

They are good for in the morning when u got bad breath, they are good for underage children cus it "looks cute", and they are for older men and little children so the men don't look like pedophiles.

Kiss on the cheek. It shouldn't hurt. I think you can make out with her hand too.

Posted

Originally posted by Franken@Mar 6 2004, 08:23 PM

Hey guys, I'm at a bit of a dilema here. Me and my girlfriend have been recently talking about kissing and weren't sure if it was ok. We agreed that since we're both 15 that we'd wait at least until we were 16. I was wondering what kind of views the church has on this (I'm not really familiar with them). So basically, do they Strongly discourage it, just sort of discourage, agree, neutral, do you guys know?

Spencer W. Kinball said that iwould be a good idea if the first kiss came at the alter. Some people I know truly think it is a good idea to wait till you are engaged. For guys, I think they shouldn't kiss before the mission. I know a lot of kids who kissed like 25 girls, and then the day before they were going to be set apart as a missionary, they just had to make out with their current girlfriend(s) for an hour. They would say sick things like "one should not go into the desert without a sufficient supply of water" Don't kiss anyone till you are 16. And as for the tounge, that is for marriage. Don't go French witha nicmo, it is not a good idea.
Posted

I think it is intimate and personal and because things can progress farther quickly I do not recomend it at that young of age. Your body is changing and your hormones are racing, it is best to wait until you are older and ready for the responsibilty

of dating. I have seen to many pregnant teens say (it just started with a kiss we never thought it would go this far) If they only had known they would have waited...Be causouse and take it slow............you are only 15 and have your whole lives to kiss..............

Just a thought.

LaurelTree

Posted

Originally posted by Franken@Mar 9 2004, 12:12 AM

So do you think that kissing on the lips would be ok if we didn't go to far (for example not too far as in French kiss)?

Don't french. Save your toungue for your wife yo.
  • 4 weeks later...
Posted

Franken....

Don't put yourself in any compromising situations and you won't have to be worrying about when to kiss someone.

There are ten steps of sexual gradification... once you pass a step in a relationship, there is no going back a step, the natural feeling is to move forward.

1. hand-to-hand

2. hand-to-shoulder

3. hand-to-waist

4. face-to-face

5. hand-to-head

6. body-to-body (hug)

7. mouth-to-face

8. mouth-to-mouth

9. hand-to-body

10. body-to-body (sex)

Now, at 15, do you really want to be at step #8 on a 10-step process?

~serapha~

Posted

There are some people who have gone through high school and kissed and all and not made it any further right?

There's no reason to walk on the edge all of your teen years either....

And, I don't know what "and all" means....

If statistics count, such as you seem to be citing, then you may know this... you have a long life ahead of you... no reason to hurry in any relationship now.

Practice doesn't make perfect in all things.

~serapha~

Posted

Also remember you can never go back. At least it's VERY VERY hard to. That's why the church suggests no dating til you're 16. Friends of mine who were dating at age 12, were having sex by 18. And all my friends who were very giving with their relations, will tell you that once they had sex the first time, they had almost every chance afterwards.

Posted

BTW....

There are some people who have gone through high school and kissed and all and not made it any further right?

My children made it though high school just fine... but they were never "unsupervised". They were never permitted to go anywhere that there wasn't a parent or a responsible person in charge of them.

YOu might say... "You were too strict"... no, I wasn't... In a sense, they were given an excape.... "my parents won't let me" saved them from a lot of heartache.

As a mom, I would like to see you spared heartache in your "growing up" years. Build up the "friendship" and hold off on the "relationship"

~serapha~

Posted

Yeah, I know what you mean. At least things will get a little bit less complicated soon enough, it's 19 days until my birthday. Plus, her parents have postponed the age that she can date until she is 16 and a half.

Posted

Originally posted by Franken@Apr 7 2004, 09:09 PM

There are some people who have gone through high school and kissed and all and not made it any further right?

Yeah, because the person they were dating moved to another state, died in a car accident or got married to someone else.
Posted

As for the church's standards:

<a href=\'http://www.lds.org/youthresources/pdf/ForStrengYouth36550.pdf\' target=\'_blank\'>http://www.lds.org/youthresources/pdf/ForS...gYouth36550.pdf</a>

Click on <span style=\'color:red\'>Sexual Purity. It gives specifc things that are not acceptable as an unmarried invidual. Passionate kissing is included in this list of unacceptable.

The entire book is great for a youth to have as a compilation of standards of LDS Youth. I would ask a chuch leader for one if you do not already have one.

FOR STRENGTH OF YOUTH

broadway</span>

Posted

Yeah, don't worry about it, I've got the book. I know you guys are like all against this, and I'm a pretty well mannered guy. I won't do anything stupid, that's just the way I am. There is a difference between kissing, and passionate kissing though. Would say, a peck on the cheek or just a quick kiss on the forhead count as passionate? I can't see that those would do any harm, or do you disagree?

Posted

well, the way i see it is this, what's the point of a peck on the cheek. affection, so why not show it in some other way where kissing is no involved. it just makes life much easier. i dunno, personally, i plan on saving my first kiss for my wedding, but that's just me. i jsut think it's easier to set your standards high and keep them there then having to worry about all these rules.

Posted

As a girl who has kissed many guys, I tell you, it`s a waste of time.

No fun at all, specially if you are not in love.

No point on sharing a good kiss with someone you don`t love, and how do you know you don`t love if not married?

I wish I had saved my kisses for my husband.

But, that`s just me.

:love:

  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 months later...
Posted

Man, I hate this all... all of you were right in opposing me, and only now do I see it, now that it's too late. This really sucks. Everyone of my friends, everyone I've ever told any of this to had told me to get away from her, and to not get into any of this... they were all right, I can't believe how stubbourn I was not to listen. Things just aren't the same anymore. Relationships frighten me now, I'm scared of what might happen... can't I just find someone who has values and is willing to stand up for them? Instead of someone who wants to drag me down with them? Egh... well, as an update as to what's happenned recently, I broke up with her awhile ago, reason being, she couldn't respect me at all, even cheated on me. I just don't understand what went through her head, and how she thought all of this wouldn't happen... now we're not even friends, I mean, I've tried just being friends with her after all of this, but she can't even respect me as a friend :( . It's all so stressful...

Posted

Get used to it buddy. And, don't worry about it. The very best advice you could receive and adhere to is as follows:

No kissing until you're married except for the type of kiss you might give your mother or sister - on the forehead or cheek.

Don't date only one girl. Date lots of girls. Its much easier to know what you want in a wife if you understand what's on the market!! Dating one girl steadily all too often leads to familiarity that leads to mistakes which are often serious mistakes. A good rule of thumb is to never date the same girl more than twice in a row. If you want to date her a third time you have to date at least one other girl first. Don't look for a serious relationship at your age. Wait until you have learned enough about life to be able to do it right.

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