Atheist Holiday

[the_jason]

My Kind of Judge

In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate. The case was brought before a judge.

After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared, “Case dismissed!”

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, “Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances.. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah...yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!”

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, “Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate his own atheists' holiday!”

The lawyer pompously said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheist, just when might that holiday be, your Honor?”

The judge said, “Well it comes every year on exactly the same date---April 1st! Since our calendar sets April 1st as 'April Fools Day,' consider that Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture, he is a fool, and April 1st is his holiday! Now have a good day and get out of my courtroom!!”

I'm not sure how true this is, but dang it's good.

[Guest AutumnBreez]

My Kind of Judge

In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate. The case was brought before a judge.

After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared, “Case dismissed!”

The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, “Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances.. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah...yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!”

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, “Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate his own atheists' holiday!”

The lawyer pompously said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheist, just when might that holiday be, your Honor?”

The judge said, “Well it comes every year on exactly the same date---April 1st! Since our calendar sets April 1st as 'April Fools Day,' consider that Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, in my opinion, if your client says there is no God, then by scripture, he is a fool, and April 1st is his holiday! Now have a good day and get out of my courtroom!!”

I'm not sure how true this is, but dang it's good.

Oh my....that is good- Scripture based and all!

[Doctor Steuss]

Perhaps that Judge should have read Matthew 5:22

[MorningStar]

I thought you were going to say, "A FESTIVUS FOR THE REST OF US!"

[CourtneyP]

I thought you were going to say, "A FESTIVUS FOR THE REST OF US!"

*falls over laughing* Hee hee! Oh that's funny!

[Guest HEthePrimate]

That is funny.

Somehow I suspect that the story isn't really true--after all, who would the atheist sue for the lack of an atheist holiday? If they don't have a holiday, it's their own fault for not making one!

But yes, Festivus is the first thing I thought of, too!!

His Eminence, The Primate

[MorningStar]

Someday I will have a Festivus pole. Someday .....