nickleboyblue

The basic psychology of a human being is that we naturally are unhappy when forced to do anything we do not wish to do. The difficult part is determining what it is your kids want to do, because even though they might not seem like they do, they may very well want to go to church with you. Here's a few things to avoid: Don't nag. Nagging gets annoying and tends to repel, not attract. Don't play the guilt card too often. It can be useful, but no one likes to feel guilty, and again, it can repel them away from the church. What to do: Pray. Pray a TON. You are not the one who touches their hearts, that's the spirit's job. Technically speaking, it would require surgery for you to reach that far, but the spirit reaches where no man can. Once you've got God on your side, you can show them by example how much joy the gospel brings into your life, and how much it has changed you for the better. They will begin to wonder what it's all about. Remove any pictures or paintings in your house that might offend the spirit, but do it gradually, replacing them with things that are conducive to the spirit. And PRAY. You never know what kind of a seed you plant until one day, your kid calls you up and asks for the help he knows only you have access to.

It's probably already been said, but first step is to talk to your bishop. We can say all we want to, but it's your bishop that has the authority to receive revelation for your recovery. Second step, stop looking at porn! I know what it's like because I've seen it myself and I have friends who let it ruin their lives. It's hard to get out of because it leaves a huge hole in your life that turns into a vacuum. If you don't fill it with good things, like scripture reading, prayer, internet content filters, and good friends, it will fill right back up with the wrong things. Suggestions: 1: move the computer to an open spot in your home, like the living room. 2: discuss your problems with your parents. 3: NEVER even look at the computer unless someone else is home with you and can see what you are doing. 4: talk to your bishop. It might take a while to be forgiven, and frankly, you'll probably have relapses every now and again. 5: know that you are no less valuable than any other person on earth. This is a big one. 6: DON'T EVER get comfortable. If you think you've overcome your problem, you haven't yet. It's most likely a lifelong addiction that you have to CONSTANTLY fight. By getting comfortable, you stop fighting, and that's the exact moment it comes back. It's not like drugs, where you can simply overcome the physical addiction and be over it. It's a mental addiction that eats you up until you've stayed clean for long enough that you can't remember the images long enough. 7: fill your time with good things, like scripture reading, prayer, EXERCISE (ooh, that's a big one, because exercise increases self-control and confidence), and any good hobbies that have nothing to do with the computer. These things help me and my friends to keep away from the temptation. Notice how I say it in the present tense, because if you think it's over, that's when you're the weakest, because the availability of it is only going to get worse in the future. You need to fortify yourself against invasion like the Nephites did during their wars if you are ever going to get sober and stay sober for good. Those fortifications have to be constantly improved as well, because the enemy learns how to get around them.

Just a couple of notes: The atonement works through covenants, which are two-way agreements between ourselves and Deity. Think of covenants as a sort of contract, or maybe even a law of physics: you jump, and gravity pulls you back down, which is a natural reaction to your action. God sets the requirements and the blessings (or the actions and the consequences), and gives us the opportunity to enter into these covenants. The covenant of baptizm is not just a two-way agreement. Here is why: 1: We lived before we were born, as spirit sons and daughters of God in His presence. We gathered in a counsel where God told us His plan, His doctrine, and how it was all going to be carried out. He asked for a volunteer to perform the atonement for us, and Christ stepped forward. Satan also stepped forward, but with a plan of his own and the idea that he would force everyone to accept salvation. Satan was rejected, Christ was accepted. When Christ was accepted, he was given the power to forgive sin through a covenant between himself and God. This covenant is found in the last chapter of the Book of Mormon, Moroni 10:33. This passage states that, when we repent, we are made perfect through the shedding of the blood of Christ, which is IN THE COVENANT WITH THE FATHER. That covenant is the only reason that Christ's blood as a symbol has any more effect on us than any other man's blood. 2: Our side of the covenant is entered into by baptism. Without it, we are not covered by the sin-forgiving properties of the atonement and are left only tot he resurrection, to rise in our bodies and be judges of God. When we are baptized, we covenant that we will always strive to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, which means we will continually improve ourselves throughout life through repentance. In other words, we are covenanting to repent. 3: Repentance requires baptism. Alma 34:16 states that those who do not have the faith to repent are not covered by the atonement in any way except that they, as all others, will be resurrected to be judged of God. It might seem a little harsh to say that no man is forgiven except through baptism, but when you think about it, if God gave Christ the power to forgive sins if Christ would suffer the pains of the atonement, and if Christ extends that forgiveness to us if we first enter into baptism, it is consistent with the way that God has always dealt with us, and that is through covenant. That is why baptism is talked about so often not as the final goal, but as the gate to enter into the way to God. Clarification: just FYI, these statements only apply to the highest degree of salvation, which is salvation in God's presence. The last verse of Romans 6 tells us that there is only one punishment for sin, and that is death. What is meant here is spiritual death, or separation from God's presence, and that spiritual death comes to all who sin, meaning that no one comes back to God except through Christ's atonement for our sins. Not that this scripture does not say a little sin brings a little death, and a lot of sin brings a lot of death. It is one punishment for ALL sin. Also note that forgiveness of your sins does not occur two thousand years ago. What happened then prepared Christ through His covenant with God to forgive us of our sins, and no one, including ourselves, is more excited about forgiving your sins than Christ. To some, even salvation in a lower degree of glory than that which is in God's presence will feel like a sort of death, because they will know that they could have done better had they tried because God was there to give them the strength. I want you to know that salvation is one and the same as the highest degree of happiness that exists, even beyond our imaginations. I know I can't be happy there without my family and friends, and I know they wouldn't be happy there without their families and friends. In order for salvation to work for everyone who is going to be saved, all of their true family and friends, all of those who they truly love and adore, have to make it in too. Otherwise, heaven is no place for me, you, Moses, or any other faithful believer.

If you're willing to wait a while for shipping, you can order scriptures through the church's official website. That eliminates the middle man. I was trying to buy the cheapest set of extra large print at a book store, but when I realized that the soft, thin-cover bible was a whole fifty bucks, I looked it up on lds.org, and discovered that you could get the same thing for a mere eight dollars. I've received my five dollar triple, but the Bible is still on it's way due to back orders. It takes a long time, sometimes a month or two, but in the end, it's the cheapest unused alternative I am aware of.

Keep up your good work! You don't feel it now, but God is aware of you personally in a much deeper way than you can ever imagine. I can't go into the doctrinal details here because there isn't much room, but there is an answer to the question: how many drops of Christ's blood were spilt for me personally? We don't know how many fell from his body in Gethsemane, but through deep study and prayer, you can learn that it wasn't a tiny portion. It was EVERY SINGLE DROP. Every last thing Christ did, he did for you personally, because the atonement has no limit to how many sins it covers. As far as becoming active again... that's your choice, and doing so will help you tons. It's not a sign that you've necessarily been forgiven, it's a thing you do IN ORDER to be forgiven. The church isn't for perfect people. It's for you and I.

Everyone feels the spirit differently, because according to Nephi, God speaks to us in our own language, according to our understanding. In other words, He will not only speak English to you, but He will speak it in the exact same way that you think it. For me, I don't always think in words. God simply puts thoughts in my head that tell me what to do when I need to do something. I can't always tell the difference between my own thoughts and what God is telling me, but when I do, it's because the thoughts that come from God are clear and direct, and don't always agree completely with my own desires. It's like wanting to do something that YOU don't really want to do, if that makes any sense. Only rarely do I feel the deep emotional response tot he spirit. Usually, it's just a simple thought, like a three word text message from God.

I don't know about you, but I can't LIVE without breakfast. If the traditional foods make you feel sick to your stomach, try eating things that are less dessert-like, like regular old sandwiches. American breakfasts are WAY to packed with sugar and carbs to be all that healthy.

I would say the same thing: writing them, calling them, visiting them, etc., when they get off their mission is perfectly fine, just don't delve into that before the mission is through. Sadly, many Mormons look down on that sort of thing, but I know several perfectly happy and good couples that resulted from similar beginnings. Don't worry about what people think, and Good Luck!

I had a similar experience. A girl wanted to seriously date me. Before my mission, I always got the same answer from God when I prayed, and that was always a big fat NO. When I prayed about this girl, I got a different answer. God said, "Sure, go for it, if that's what you like..." So I was forced to look at myself and see if I liked this girl. It took all of about two seconds to find out that I honestly couldn't say that I did, so I cut it off right there. She came back to me asking me to reconsider, but I told her straight up, God gave me the choice, and I choose to wait for a girl who I could share a deep and abiding mutual love with. I have now met another girl who I will marry one day if everything works out in the end. I feel no real fear for this because God told me straight up to go for it as soon as I found a girl I could honestly say I liked. Seriously, this is eternity, and you're going to have to step on some feet to get the one you want. Don't worry about hurting feelings so much, because there's really no other way for it to happen.

You might try writing.com which is one that I used before. As with any web 2.0 site, you have to be careful with which posts you read, but it's a very well-organized site. Otherwise, I would say steer clear of that site and any site that installs stuff on your computer without you knowing it or approving it. Those bugs are notorious for popping up bad images without you even clicking on anything.

Be VERY careful about the idea of "flirt to convert." Don't get me wrong, missionary work is great, but I know WAY too many people who got married and are now in a mess because they couldn't get their spouse to join the church like they thought they could. Serious dating should probably be reserved for church members. Of course, you could pray about it .

Depending on where you're from, there honestly may not be all that many LDS people close enough to her age who could be attractive to her in any way... you can't expect mere goodness to be enough, and despite what many say, physical attraction has to be there to spark things, and in my experience, that is a very rare thing to come across a good person who also attracts you. Let her be her own person, but make sure you do all you can to teach her what is right through daily family prayer and scripture study, etc. Might seem over simplified, but going to church, reading scriptures, having family home evening, having family prayer, and basically living the gospel, coupled with bearing your testimony in a casual way to her, will probably be the best thing you can do for her at the moment.

Just because us RM types LOOK like we've lived perfect lives doesn't mean we have. I've messed up many a time in my life, and I am working to overcome my own weaknesses. People who know me might think I've always been who I am now, but I haven't. I've had to work to get here, and you've had to work to get where you are. If this guy is worthy of YOU, then he'll understand that it doesn't so much matter where you've been, it matters more where you are now as a result of your own efforts in life. If he doesn't understand that, he doesn't deserve two seconds of your attention in spite of his outward accomplishments. I bet he'll understand you though if you honestly think he's a great guy.

Some think my system for marking is a little overboard, and I must admit, I am a bit obsessed. Preach My Gospel says that we should find a method of marking that works for us. This is what I've done. (Note: I DO NOT color-code mark according to subject because when I tried that, I found out very fast that some scriptures have to do with just about everything, and when you want to mark it for the atonement, it's already marked for missionary work, thus making colors very confusing and resulting in confusing boxes, shadings, and who knows what else. Subject color coding is EXTREMELY complex and difficult to stick to as a result, because you have to leave room for other colors every time you mark.) 1: Finding scriptures. I like to remember where scriptures I have marked are. I have recently purchased a cheap triple soft cover, no metalic page edges, for a very good reason: it helps you when indexing your scriptures. I have written on the twelve inch front face of my scriptures 34 columns, each one representing a different gospel study topic. When I underline or highlight (or both) a scripture, I mark the edge of that page (And I mean the VERY right side edge) inside of the appropriate column, in one of three colors, so that when I close the book, if I want a scripture that has to do with any one of my subjects, I look inside of that column and can see, without opening the book, little slivers of color where the scriptures i have marked are. The colors i use on indexing are: RED for very relevant or useful scriptures, BLUE for semi-relevant, and GREEN for deeper or more difficult scriptures to explain or understand, but that still hold relevance to the subject. 2: Underlining for interpretation I underline my scriptures with the four-color pens you can find at retailers. Those include red, blue, green, and black. I underline in RED for when God, Christ, the Holy Ghost, or Angels are speaking. In other words, when the source is incorruptible. I underline in BLUE when a prophet or some other inspired person is speaking. I underline in GREEN when uninspired people are speaking, or just to indicate when narrative or event-oriented wording is involved. (Again, note that I do underlining by who is speaking, and not by subject. This helps me interpret scripture sources more quickly and efficiently on the fly) 3: Highlighting for interpretation I highlight using one of those over-priced, eight-color crayon-pens you can buy at LDS book stores. I use RED simply to place emphasis on a word. I use BLUE and PINK to indicate commandment lists, which helps me differentiate between where one commandment ends and the next one begins in commandment lists. I also use those colors to indicate cause-and-effect relationships between commandments and blessings. Blessings are indicated by YELLOW and LIGHT BLUE, as these often come in lists as well. This helps me when I am discussing promised blessings individually in relation to the commandments those blessings are connected to. ORANGE and GREEN are used to indicate detail lists, such as location details, or to otherwise differentiate between listed items that I deem important and that have no cause-and-effect relationship with anything else in the surrounding scriptures. I use BROWN to indicate satanic/tempting logic, logic that Satan uses to convince people to sin, stratagies used to cause spiritual downfall, etc., so that I can keep my eye out for things that I might be thinking at the time that could lead me on to sin. 4: glue-ins. I am a firm believer in glue-ins that help in gospel study. When I get handouts in church classes or when I discover interesting thoughts or make interesting footnotes, etc., I type out potential glue-ins. When a particular location gets enough glue-in information to mostly cover an entire page, I print out the glue-in, glue the extreme left side of the paper, and place it in the pages of my book so that it will not fall out unless I myself remove it. 5: Reader's footnotes and top-notes, and margin use I place numbers next to words or phrases that relate to other scriptures but that are not footnoted to those scriptures in the text already. I then place a little arrow next to the little number, pointing up or down, to indicate where one will find the note, if it be on the top margin or the bottom margin. I use the inner-margins for hand-written notes, etc., and I use right-side margins to specify which scriptures that index slivers refer to. Because of this system of marking, I never prepare talks word-for-word, because I can simply stand up at the podium and share insights and scriptures from my already studied gospel topics columns, and I have external sources, like general authority quotes, interpretation helps (Through marking), and so on, build in to my system. If you would like to use this system, go for it. It really does help a lot. However, I do suggest that you change it to more perfectly match your own personal needs and goals. Like I said at the beginning, Preach My Gospel states that we each should come up with a system that works for us, and just because this system works for me does not necessarily mean that it works for everyone. I hope that helps?

I think the funny thing that people overlook is that, since we are commanded to live the law of chastity as defined by the prophet, we are accountable for our sins in those areas. In other words, if we are true members of the church, we believe what the prophet says under revelation to be the word of God. If that be the case, we obey it as such. The word of God then states that sexual relationships outside of marriage are prohibited, and that marriage is defined as the lawful and preferably eternal union of one man and one woman. I don't think God is going to be very merciful when someone steps up to the plate at judgement day and says, "but the animals do it!" I think humans exist on a slightly higher plane than animals, because isn't that what God says in the opening passages of the Bible?