I have no desire to end my marriage. I have no desire to hold this against her either. I have been following most of the advice from above since this started. I have seen my bishop many times and am half way through the Book of Mormon by now. Not to mention the stack of self help books on my desk. There is a lot of good advice and I am very thankful.
She moved out two weeks ago so it's hard to bring her much service or do family prayer. We where doing family prayer when she was here but she said it was awkward and find ways not to be around for it. As far as I know thee wasn't any sexual sins. To my knowledge it is emotional and everything that comes with it.
The hardest part is now I have the physical proof and she can't lie about it she still doesn't want to take the steps to mend it. It so hard now to keep putting myself out there. The constant lying and she demonizes me to anyone that will listen to her story. My counselor told me that our chances are slime to none. So has she. She lives 45 minutes away now and has all the papers ready. I called the other man the first time I found out and told him to get lost in the most professional way possible. I guess I have lost hope after beating my head against the wall for so long thing it was all about me and reaching three weeks ago and find out it was a a real affair. Thanks again for the advice. I'm doing all of this on my phone so it makes it hard to type and read back to clarify.