adsf1999

That's awesome I have some family around the San Diego area And I got called to the Maryland Baltimore Mission! Super excited!!

Thank you all so much for all your responses, they've been so helpful and quite honestly comforting to hear. I guess I'll give a brief update. We had been casually talking for the past month, but you could tell there was an obvious discomfort because we didn't really know how to handle things. I had been praying constantly trying to figure out how to settle things and kind of just feel a little more at peace with everything especially if I was planning on serving a mission soon, I really just wanted to get these feelings handled before I left. It's funny how the Lord works sometimes. A few days ago I decided to talk to him like some of you had suggested. I had this whole outline in my head like 'its okay and we can still be friends, this shouldn't be as awkward as it is, we can still email each other, etc.' That never happened. We ended up talking about how we had felt about each other during our relationship. Once again we really refrained from getting too emotional during our relationship so this was really different. I think just hearing how much he cared for me was enough to give me a bit of peace as I still young and feel pretty self conscious about things like that. We ended doing what I thought would have been the worst case scenario, but I think now it was for the best. I think as we talked we both knew why we really needed to break up before the mission. When we started dating we didn't plan on breaking up and his parents dated throughout each other's missions so I just hoped it could be the same. I won't mention his reason for needing to end things, but as for me, I think I just became a little too dependent on him making me happy. My mood just revolved around him and that's not healthy for a mission. We decided it was best not to text much before we leave and we also decided not to email. This would have been the end of the world to me a month ago, but honestly I'm relieved. It's funny I guess because my biggest fear was losing my best friend and cutting him off feels like I'm doing exactly that, but for some reason I feels like the right thing at this time. He's still my best friend, and we are going back to the same school when we get back so this obviously isn't the end (of our friendship at least). I really don't know where it's headed but once again I really appreciate all the responses, they helped me sort out my feelings quite a bit. On a sidenote, my mission call came in a few days ago!!!

Recently my boyfriend of about a year and I decided to end our relationship as we were both planning on serving a mission. We dated throughout senior year of high school and were extremely cautious getting into a relationship and made sure that we were never in a situation that would affect our ability to go. We still got very emotionally close to the point that made the break up really difficult for me. I had been getting promptings about calling it off maybe two or three days before the actual break up, but he was the one to bring up separating. It caught me off guard a bit but after a lot of praying I knew I was time. Although we both agree that we need to take out the romance from our relationship, it's been very draining on me. I'm still having a hard time not knowing what's going to happen after this; leading up to the mission, during the mission, and afterwards. He submitted his call yesterday while I plan on submitting it within the next week or two which means we still have a few months of seeing each other. He only lives a few houses down from me, we attend a majority of the same classes, and our friend group consists of the same people. So I guess this is what I'm asking: 1) What's the best way to deal with this type of break up? We still have mutual feelings towards each other but I'm not sure if I should try moving on and try to rid myself of these feelings or if I should accept them and just know that after the mission we might not be interested in each other. 2) How can I remain his friend and still keep my distance before the mission? No matter what he's still my best friend and I don't want to lose him over this. Would texting him still be distracting? I'm guessing one on one talking might not be best but I'm not sure honestly. 3) Can I still email him over the mission? I just want to send him my mission updates and just see how he's doing or would that also be distracting for him? 4) How do I get over this fear that I might really lose him after the mission? 5) Just overall, how do I get over this break up? I'm really struggling as once again we were really close. We were never physical in anyway honestly. Our relationship most just consisted on holding hands and very few kisses. We were both very much not into PDA to the point where people didn't even know we were dating. We never said things like 'i love you' because that's intense for a relationship before a mission but we were very emotionally invested. We both had liked each other for about a year before we dated and finally decided to date for the next year. It's really hard to let go but I know it's for the best but I'd like any advice to help ease the process. If you have or know of a familiar story between missionaries and what eventually happened I really like to know.