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Hi All, This is my first post on this forum so bear with me. I am the Relief Society president in my YSA ward. I have had the calling for about 7 months now. I accepted the calling with quite a bit of hesitancy - I am not typically the personality that you would think of when it comes to the job. I enjoy dark, irreverent humor and I am often described as an odd duck. I like it that way. However, I had been endowed a couple of months prior and felt I was on a spiritual high, and I thought I could be a great resource to the girls in the ward as I am a good listener and I'm pretty good at being nonjudgmental. I also felt very close to my Bishop that I would be serving with. The day I was sustained, it was announced that there would be a new bishopric. Okay, no big deal - I will support my leadership and I'm sure they'll do wonderfully. We got along alright, especially with the counselors. However, over time Bishop and I started butting heads. In order for me to be sane in this calling, I wanted to be ME. My own best version of RS president. However, he had a different vision - he wanted me to be a very cookie cutter version of myself, doing things in a way he was familiar with. I struggled, but I believe I was called for a reason. I was motivated to do good by my ward and by the Lord. A LOT of things in my life started changing though. I had been dating a guy long-distance that I had met on Mutual (Mormon dating app) before even getting the calling, but it started getting more serious. In addition, I got my first big girl job (which as someone with MAJOR job anxiety was a HUGE deal for me), and life just got busy. I started enjoying church less and less, because Ward Council would always end on a very sour note. I became FAR less engaged in the ward than I had been, except for a few very close friends. But I continued to trek on in the calling. I did what needed to be done. I reached out to those I felt prompted to. But. For the past good while, I have felt COMPLETELY disengaged from this calling. I want so badly to salvage my testimony, but I feel so overwhelmed by the responsibilities of it all. In addition, I have been struggling with issues that I struggled with when I was inactive. To much lesser degrees, but still. It's a vicious cycle - I felt a disconnect from the gospel despite this wonderful calling, so I'd make choices that pushed me farther away, then I'd feel even farther away, etc etc. In addition, because of my past inactivity, my family (who I live with) always assumes that if I make one little mistake or do something they disapprove of, I must be committing horrible sins, because I have in the past... But I have repented of those sins. It hurts to see the lack of trust. For example, when I visited my boyfriend, they assumed that we were breaking the law of chastity and being irresponsible. Simply not the case. Anyway, this is so rambling, I apologize. I'll get to the point. At this time in my life, I am struggling with my calling and I honestly believe it is harming my relationship with the gospel. I also know I am not making the best choices, but it's nothing that would call for me to be released. It still is hard to deal with with all the added pressure however. I just feel as if I'm being forced into a little box and it makes me want to punch my way out and run away! But I don't want to leave. I want to remain active and good and faithful. But in my position, it is so hard. Also, the fact that I've had several quite negative run-ins with my bishop, as well as hearing him talk about others in their failures/faults, does not make me comfortable expressing all of this to him. At. All. Basically I'm a hot mess. The only person I've expressed all this to is my boyfriend. But he's probably sick of hearing it and I'd love to hear what you guys have to say. Thanks.
I know this was posted earlier I believe, but I think my situation is a little different. Hopefully if it's a repeat you can just bypass this post. Well, I have struggled with depression since childhood and have gotten help on and off along the way. Lately, my depression has gotten significantly worse, and it's causing me to miss my church meetings! I am a nursery assistant in my ward, and this will be the third time I haven't shown up in three months. I also have extremely bad anxiety when I feel I am trapped in a building with no real way to "escape". I have been on my knees all morning praying and listening to hymns but still don't feel 100%. What am I doing wrong? I feel awful about not attending church and my mother makes me feel even worse since she truly doesn't understand. On a side note: I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder last July but never felt it was correct...maybe I am wrong. Currently I am not on any medications. Just looking for some advice and guidance and love at this time. Thank you all and god bless!
I was released from one calling on Sunday and asked to take on two to replace it. When I got the early Sunday morning phone call to come in for a meeting with the Bishop, I told myself I would not decide until I had time to submit the decision to prayer. That's where I'm at, and I'd like some input from other members. Would you take on two callings if it potentially conflicted with your family's economic livelihood and your personal callings in life? I was released Sunday from the Young Men's presidency after about one year as Scoutmaster and 2nd Counselor. This has been a challenging calling with only 5 - 8 Aaronic Priesthood youth who attend YM during the week, but I've done the best I could, though I grew up a non-member in traditional Scouting and think it's much better. So I was asked first in a meeting with the Bishop to become the Weblos leader. He said I can do it pretty much any night of the week I want. He told me they had another calling in mind for me as well, and that a brother from the Stake would be issuing that call. I told the Bishop I had concerns about being able to fulfill two callings: I've been largely unemployed for the past year. (If my father had not given us a significant gift, we would likely have lost our house. The Bishop knows my tithing total, so he's not completely ignorant of my situation.) I told the Bishop that taking care of my family's needs has got to come first. (We have four sons 8-14.) He said let's wait on the Weblos calling and you talk to the brother from the Stake. The Brother from the Stake asks me if I am willing to "accept a calling to serve the Lord" or something like that. Talk about putting you in a box. Of course I said yes. Then he asked if I would serve as Ward Membership Clerk. "What's it involve?" I ask. "Two to three hours a week updating records, people moving in, people moving out, entering new callings..." he said. "Well, I could do that..." I ventured. (Keeping records is a no-brainer, I thought to myself. I already know most of the software.) "Great, let's get your wife in here..." and I stopped him. "Please understand, I promised myself I would study any calling offered me and submit it to prayer before I accepted." He was definitely shocked. He listened to my reasoning and then brought my wife in. He explained the calling, and I deferred my decision as I said I would. During Sacrament meeting the Weblos leader was called to replace me as 2nd Counselor, and they called a new fellow to fill the empty 1st Counselor position. My wife is Pioneer stock; I'm a convert of 16+ years. She's a bit taken aback that I would even consider saying "no" to a calling. I told her what she already knows: I have received personal revelation from God that He has two great callings for me that have nothing do do with church: the first is a business He has called me to build, and the second is an organization He has called me to lead. Each requires, depending on the week, from 5-10 hours of time per week. My business requires 2-3 evenings a week and at least one Saturday a month. My responsibilities to the organization take me out of town for a weekend once a month, and I will spend two full weeks next summer with that organization. Both of these are demanding and my Bishop knows nothing of them. Before I converted, my first bishop taught me to always study out my decisions and submit them to the Lord for confirmation. Brigham Young taught "the greatest fear I have is that the people of this Church will accept what we say as the will of the Lord without first praying about it and getting the witness within their own hearts that what we say is the word of the Lord." (Harold B. Lee, Stand Ye In Holy Places, pp. 162-3, "The Prophet, Seer, and Revelator," Address delivered to seminary and institute teachers, BYU, July 8, 1964) So I am studying and gathering information about the two callings before I make a decision and submit it to prayer. We have a smaller ward and there are not enough warm, active bodies to go around. I believe I could manage the Weblos calling. I called a former membership clerk and asked him how much time he put in each week. “12-15 hours,” he said. “Visiting new move-ins to verify their address, to get a phone number, track down families who have moved with no forwarding address…” and just simple record-keeping, printing reports, updating records. That time requirement was a bit of a shock. I’m anxious to let the Bishop and the Brother from the Stake know what Heavenly Father has answered. I know He will give me direction. Has anyone else ever said "no" to a calling with a clean conscience? Let me know what you think!
What do you think is magnifying your calling? When I get a calling, I get the information out of the general handbook and see what exactly the calling entails, what I am supposed to do, am responsible for. Then I try to do it. In the ward I am now in it in seems like no one else does this. It seems like people do the minimum or don't really know what their calling really is. It is frustrating to me because all of the callings reflect on each other and create an organized well functioning machine. If some don't know what they are supposed to be doing, they won't be doing it which causes a domino effect which ends up affecting everybody. I know I should be worried about what I am responsible for and make sure and do that. How do I keep from letting what others don't do affect me so much? When you know how good it can be?