Aramendil Posted June 30, 2009 Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 ...how may I know that Heavenly Father is telling me that she's the right one to marry? Tell me your experiences; I know it varies from person to person, but I'd just like to know what you think, if any of you are willing to tell, even if it's just general. Many regards, Aramendil Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Misshalfway Posted June 30, 2009 Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 I think you ought to decide first if she is one YOU want to be married to. I really think God wants us to make our choice and bring it to him. Then I think he helps fill in the blanks. I don't think he will pick for you. I don't think God will arrange a marriage for you. I thought I wanted to marry one person. God helped me see that it wouldn't be a good match for me. In fact, I saw a vision in my mind of myself divorced with two kids. So...I ended it. With my husband, I can relate to you three or four different ways God helped me see that he supported my choice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazed-and-confused Posted June 30, 2009 Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 Couldn't agree more, miss halfway.......great input...........if you're not sure......REALLY not sure.....maybe it's marriage that you're unsure about, even more than if she is the right one? Even a really good marriage takes work, commitment, and growing on both parts.......you sure you're ready? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aramendil Posted June 30, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 You know...now that you mention what you did MissHalfway, I had a dream once...the girl in mind that I was dating at the time (and have been dating since) showed quite disdainful feelings and almost outright hatred toward me. You see...I have certain conditions...mental ones and she has often told me that she doesn't want to deal with that, sooooooo, perhaps she's not that one? I was feeling a lot of anxiety about it earlier today, but after praying about it and reading your supportive replies, I think I'm going to take action accordinly. Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aramendil Posted June 30, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 I think you ought to decide first if she is one YOU want to be married to. I really think God wants us to make our choice and bring it to him. Then I think he helps fill in the blanks. I don't think he will pick for you. I don't think God will arrange a marriage for you.I thought I wanted to marry one person. God helped me see that it wouldn't be a good match for me. In fact, I saw a vision in my mind of myself divorced with two kids. So...I ended it.With my husband, I can relate to you three or four different ways God helped me see that he supported my choice.Do tell, I can use all the learning I can get. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmy- Posted June 30, 2009 Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 Use your brain. Do you love her? Does she love you? Can you support her? Do you want to be with her forever? If yes.. I doubt God wants you to pass that up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Misshalfway Posted June 30, 2009 Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 I had one relationship with a young man who I loved a great deal. He loved me too. It looked like everything would be great between us. He would have had a great career. He would have supported me in my endeavers. Why wouldn't I want to be married to him forever? One day the two of us were sitting in the Celestial room together and the Spirit told me to break up with him. It was out of the blue. It was a commandment. My boyfriend also got a spiritual commandment. He was told to do obediently whatever it was that I said to him. We were both heartbroken. We broke up 11 times before the two of us had the courage to follow what the Lord had said. I think we can and should use our brains and our hearts and our intuition to make a decision like this. But involving God in the process can help us see more to our answers than just a yes or a no. God can help us see around corners we can't on our own. Use your faculties.....but rely on the Spirit too. And with regards to your dream.....I can't know whether that was a revelation dream or not. Could be your fears playing out. If you do have some struggles, this may be an indication that you need to discuss them openly and directly with this girl. Ask the Lord to help you discern wisdom during your conversation. If she says things to placate you, that could be a red flag that she isn't ready for that challenge. If she has shown resentment in the past, perhaps you could kindly talk about that and see if maybe she is scared or having doubts. It may also show you that your sweetheart is stronger than you thought. I really think we gotta get in there and work out these issues and negotiate to see if the relationship can handle that scrutiny now. If it can't now, then it certainly won't when real life hits. And you will have more information to take to the Lord in your prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heavenguard Posted June 30, 2009 Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 Use your brain. Do you love her? Does she love you? Can you support her? Do you want to be with her forever?But not only that, does she love you the way you need her to? Can she support you in your life?My recent ex-boyfriend wasn't able to be there for me, and he knew it, so he broke it off with me. It was hurtful at first, but I realized quickly soon after that sooner or later, it would have failed anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted June 30, 2009 Report Share Posted June 30, 2009 Use your brain. Do you love her? Does she love you? Can you support her? Do you want to be with her forever? If yes.. I doubt God wants you to pass that up.As has been pointed out there is a little more to it than that, but you make a very valid point. Don't expect God to point out [magical stars and rainbows] The One! [/magical stars and rainbows]. Not a bad idea to ask him to help you see things clearly though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Islander Posted July 6, 2009 Report Share Posted July 6, 2009 You know...now that you mention what you did MissHalfway, I had a dream once...the girl in mind that I was dating at the time (and have been dating since) showed quite disdainful feelings and almost outright hatred toward me. You see...I have certain conditions...mental ones and she has often told me that she doesn't want to deal with that, sooooooo, perhaps she's not that one? I was feeling a lot of anxiety about it earlier today, but after praying about it and reading your supportive replies, I think I'm going to take action accordinly. Thanks.Many of the mistakes we make in life are really the result of choices we made, many times, while aware of the potential consequences. She ALREADY told you that she wants not part of dealing with your "mental condition" and you still question whther she is the one. Mental conditions/illnesses do not go away, do not disappear and do not get cured. They can, in time and with medication, be managed but your WILL have struggle and deal with it for the rest of your life. But she already told you she DOES NOT want to deal with it.Yo need to give up your fantasies and grasp the reality of the situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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