How do you control your thoughts?

[Moksha]

A rather down to earth way of coping during the trying times that Mormonmusic asked about, is to say a prayer and then practice a progressive relaxation exercise to release tensions, worry and despair.

[Guest Godless]

I'm not sure if you're using the word in its correct context; by and large, rationalization has negative connotations attached to it. I think you may mean "putting things into context," not rationalizing.

Elphaba beat me to it, but I'll chime in anyway. I'm talking about rationalization of thoughts and emotions, not actions. Additionally, I'm not referring to rationalization as a method of justification, but rather introspection and analysis.

There's nothing wrong with using logic and reason to dissect and evaluate our emotions. This is especially true when you consider the fact that most strong emotional reactions (love and anger, for example) are often lacking of any rational foundation. There's nothing necessarily wrong with these emotions, but it's important to step back and analyze the feeling we're experiencing every now and then. If we don't, then they can overpower us and lead to poor decisions.

[Gwen]

something i've been thinking on a few days but wasn't sure how to say it. still not sure i will do a very good job. i figure there will be plenty who disagree with me... but...

it depends on the thoughts you are trying to control. sometimes i find the best way to control a thought is to give it it's due. if you are trying to fight off thoughts of porn or something i guess you don't want to indulge it. for me i get caught in cycles of depression. something will be a trigger to make me feel angry or desperate and it spirals from there. the more i "try" to not think about them and "be happy" the worse it gets. music is a good tool but i can't use a favorite "uplifting" song like everyone suggests. they feel fake, they add to my feelings. i find listening to some good depressing songs to help me take my mind off my specific situation. when i can stop thinking about the details of what hurt me then i can move to music that is more positive. i don't think i'm alone in this way of doing things when i read hymns like "master, the tempest is raging" the first two verses aren't all happy. they are doubt, fear, hurt, pain. it's the last verse that has "hope" in it. sometimes i will use those types of songs to try and change my thoughts. sometimes i sing the first verses over and over and over, never getting to the last. eventually i do but it's not easy. i can't get around, over, or passed the feelings till i give them their proper consideration. we have feelings/thoughts for a reason. sometimes we need to embrace that and understand where they come from before we can rework them.

[rameumptom]

Gwen,

For non-sinful issues, like depression, that can be very useful. One behaviorist I've spoken to regarding such issues (I work with several depressed people in prison) tells me that it helps to tell one or two people about the problem/feelings. However, for many people, they want to keep telling dozens more people, and instead of working through it, as you do, they end up making it an endless focus and cycle of depressive emotions.

Using a sad song, or discussing it, in order to achieve a better stasis is good. Dwelling on depressive issues so that one remains in a depressive state is not healthy. So there is a balance that must be achieved by seeing what is needed by the individual to get to the end-point of happiness. For you, it means allowing some of the emotion to work its way through first. But you don't get stuck repeating the first verse of "Master the Tempest is Raging". You make sure you get to the last verse of hope.

[Matthew0059]

I cannot why what everyone has said works, but it does. I echo and endorse almost every piece of advice I've read. I've dealt with serious clinical depression my whole life, and controlling my thoughts is one of the hardest aspects of it to overcome. Ultimately, it takes time and experimentation to figure out which techniques work best for you and how to effectively use them.

Brigham Young taught that the mind is like a stage: only one thing can be on at a time, but something is always playing. The trick is watching what you're thinking, and diligence.

The following techniques work very well for me:

-Pray for help- This is the most vital aspect of any endeavor. Pray for the Lord to guide you on your journey, stay worthy of the Holy Ghost (as well as you can), and strive diligently to improve yourself.

-Study only "the best books" and entertainment- Our spiritual bodies need food- we find that food in the form of study and entertainment. Just like we'll grow obese and unhealthy by eating junkfood, we will grow spiritually dull and weak by ingesting intellectual junk food. Stay away from anything that drives away the Spirit, and be highly selective in the shows you watch, books you read, etc. Most importantly, study the scriptures a bit every day and ponder on the doctrines you read about and learn. This mental exercise helps turn that spiritual food into spiritual energy, which you can in turn call upon in times of struggle or temptation. If you don't live the doctrine- including praying for charity, performing willing service, etc.- the good spiritual food you ingest will avail you nothing. It takes time for you to really notice the effects, but it will be worth the effort.

-Occupy your mind with good things- Stay busy and mentally active for most of the day, only resting when you really need it. If you are busy with worthwhile things, it will be harder for you to think of evil things. When you're in transit or otherwise not mentally occupied, ponder on the doctrine of the Christ and/or sing or hum a hymn. You don't always have to do this, of course, but you'll get the greatest stimulation and protection from pondering the doctrine. Anything good, however, will work.

-Command evil thoughts to leave- When we fall and let evil thoughts into our minds, they are as little imps running around on a stage doing obscene things. If we try by ourselves to drive them out, we could end up chasing them endlessly with little or no results. I've found the most effective way is to simply let the Lord do it. In your head (or out loud if you're having a particularly hard time) command the evil thought to leave in the name of Jesus Christ, as if it were an evil spirit. When it is gone, immediately fill the vacuum left by its absence with something good (if you don't, the thought will come back)- again, pondering the doctrine of Christ is the most effective guard against the evil thought.

That's the most effective techniques I've found. With practice and in time, you'll find that you'll have greater control over your thoughts, your usual state of mind will be elevated to greater spiritual heights, and you'll learn and realize things you never did before. Good luck!

P.S.- If you are having any problems with an addiction of anykind, seek help from your bishop, and maybe even a therapist. One of the greatest hurdles to overcome in kicking an addiction is overcoming the mental side of it.