International Pen Pals

[theoriginalavatar]

I have a question for all of you (which I will get to in a moment) if I may ask.

I admit that I can be somewhat naïve in matters of this world. I am also entirely too trusting and old-fashioned in many respects.

This has recently proven to be the case with regard to pan pals.

I have a 9-year-old daughter. I have, for some time, felt that it would be a worthwhile endeavor for her to have a pen pal from another country. I want this to be something that lasts for her whole life, if possible, and results in a great and enduring friendship.

Here is the problem that I've encountered while researching the possibilities:

How do I find a legitimate person (preferably female) around the same age as my daughter with whom she can begin correspondence?

Seems simple enough. I searched online, only to come across page after page of horror stories of folks who have encountered people who are something other than they claim to be. In other words, they have found adults claiming to be children in order to be in contact with children. Sick, I know.

My question for you is this: Do any of you have any experience with finding a pen pal for your own children (or for yourself when you were that age)? What has worked for you, and what has not? Do you know any reputable places in which to look? (Sorry, that was more than one question. )

All of this stems from something that I read in the 75th anniversary issue of Western Horseman. It is found in the Letters From Readers section of the magazine. This particular letter was entitled "LIFE-LONG FRIENDS." I want to share it with you, because I think it is deeply moving, and you will better see my desire for her to have a pen pal. It was submitted by Mrs. Margie Jones. I have included it with permission.

In the January/February 1944 issue of Western Horseman, in the Jr. Horseman section, was a picture of Marjolane Witt of Jamestown, North Dakota, and her beautiful pinto, "Shabbona." I wrote to Western Horseman and requested Marjolane's address so I could write her as a pen pal. This has resulted in a 66-year friendship. Our mutual love of horses bound us together.

Many years have passed and we still write. What a joy it has been to know her and to have shared so many great memories, and all because Western Horseman was kind enough to send her address to me. Many thanks! She and I are now 84 years old.

I love this! I know that we are in the age of e-mail, Facebook, and Twitter. I know that the very idea of pen pals seems to be a relic of the nostalgic past, but I would love for my daughter to have the oportunity, no matter how slight, to create a life-long friendship such as the one mentioned above.

I look forward to your suggestions!

(P.S. It's good to be back among you! God bless, my friends.)

[Guest]

We have a Pen Pal program at my son's Montessori school. It's limited to ages 6-12 and it's an international inter-school program. It is designed to supplement the Language Arts class - so everybody is encouraged to hand-write the letters.

There is a program sponsor in each school - the partner school for my son's school is in my hometown in the Philippines and the program sponsor is my teacher when I was in high school. She is now the principal in the elementary school. That's how my son's school got involved in this pen pal program.

This is how we started the process - The principal in the Philippines canvassed a list of names from the school to see who is interested in the program and she asked the children to fill out a short bio-data (age, grade, hobbies, favorite subject, favorite book, movie, music, etc.). She sent it to me via email - one pdf file per kid, and I printed them and posted the names on the board at my son's school. Each name got picked out by one of the kids in the school and they wrote them a letter. All the letters were given to the Montessori teacher and we both read each of the letters to make sure they follow the "rules" (no personal info like home address and phone number - all correspondence goes through the school or the program sponsor, no indecent drawings or pictures, no advertisements or solicitations etc. etc...). Then we mailed all the letters to the Philippines in one package. The principal in the Philippines reviewed the letters and handed them out to the kids. Then they wrote a response letter which also went through the principal for review and we received all the letters which we also ended up reviewing.

We target one letter exchange a month.

It's really awesome. I love the program. You can really see the difference in cultures between the two - the American kids all talk about the video games they played and the Filipino kids all talk about the TV show they watched. There is supposed to be a "theme" for each month (suggested topic to talk about, like January is about MLK and New Year's Resolutions) but we haven't been following that.

Yeah, it is very controlled though - the letters are not private. I like it that way but I can understand how this would not appeal to others.

[Guest]

P.S. I was a member of this international pen pal program when I was 12. This was before personal computers became the "norm". You pay money to join in the program and you get 5 names for X amount of money. I don't know how the program leadership screens their members and I couldn't even remember the name of the program, so yeah, it won't help you now.

But, I have to say - that was a great experience for me. I had pen pals in Great Britain, Egypt, USA, and Greece!

[theoriginalavatar]

It is designed to supplement the Language Arts class - so everybody is encouraged to hand-write the letters.

Thank you, anatess. It sounds really nice. I especially like the part of everything being done by hand. I believe that this is truly becoming a lost art. Gone are the days of long correspondences written on paper with ink. I miss this about the world today.

When I was younger (a lot younger ), I had a pen pal who lived in another state. She was introduced to me by a mutual friend. We wrote every month or so, and this lasted for many years before we lost touch. I used to love the days when I was due to receive a letter. I looked forward to them with relish! It went beyond putting pen to paper. We used to try to outdue each other by seeing who could be the most creative with various mediums.

I want this for my daughter (and eventually for my son).

[Guest]

Thank you, anatess. It sounds really nice. I especially like the part of everything being done by hand. I believe that this is truly becoming a lost art. Gone are the days of long correspondences written on paper with ink. I miss this about the world today.

When I was younger (a lot younger ), I had a pen pal who lived in another state. She was introduced to me by a mutual friend. We wrote every month or so, and this lasted for many years before we lost touch. I used to love the days when I was due to receive a letter. I looked forward to them with relish! It went beyond putting pen to paper. We used to try to outdue each other by seeing who could be the most creative with various mediums.

I want this for my daughter (and eventually for my son).

Definitely! Oh, another observation - the Filipino kids have a lot better handwriting than the American kids. I can understand that though. American schools don't practice handwriting enough. My son's Montessori actually has more handwriting practice than my other son who is in the Public School. There's just not enough time in the day. In the Philippines, school starts at 7:30AM and ends at 4:30PM, 5 days a week, with 1 hour lunch and 2 15-minute breaks. School here is from 8:30-2:30 - and that's not counting teacher planning days, early release days, spring break, etc. etc. Philippines only lets out for 8 weeks in the summer and 2 weeks around Christmas and 2 holidays.

By the way - both my kids are in the program :-). My son in the Public School was able to join in because I'm the program sponsor - w00t!

Edited January 25, 2011 by anatess

[theoriginalavatar]

Definitely! Oh, another observation - the Filipino kids have a lot better handwriting than the American kids. I can understand that though. American schools don't practice handwriting enough.

I am afraid that this is destined to get even worse! Where I live (in Clark County), we have been told by the school board that they are phasing out teaching cursive. My son, by the time he reaches the 3rd grade, may not even learn it.

I think this is horrible. I realize that there are more important things (literacy being one of them), but it is a sad day when this stuff goes by the wayside.

Take the US Constitution, for example. This may seem to be of little import to some, but to me it is deeply meaningful. There are countless versions in print form (on the internet as well as in books) whereby a child can read the words in the Constitution. What if this generation no longer learns to read and write cursive? They will not be able to read the Constitution in its original form. I think that this is terrible.

[beefche]

I would look into asking a mission president in another country (or missionary if you know one) for someone to write. Missionaries would be a good resource because they will know non-LDS as well she could write.

[theoriginalavatar]

I would look into asking a mission president in another country (or missionary if you know one) for someone to write. Missionaries would be a good resource because they will know non-LDS as well she could write.

I had not thought of that. Great idea, thank you.

[Dzein]

Hallo.. my daughter is 9 years old and she wanted penpals her age so i wanted to find out a bit more about it but it does not look so safe.... otherwise its great to be welcomed :) God bless

[pam]

This thread is also almost 3 years old. But welcome.