lizzy16 Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 A young women age 15 in my wards cousin died. Her cousin was 16. They were best friends. The death was sudden and unexpected. The cousin and her family isn't a member. How can I help my friend with this shock? She died friday. Today was super saturday. My stake went bowling. She came and cried and hugged people and didn't seem as upset as I thought she would be. Then again she could be home freaking out. I really want to help her. Advice? What should I avoid? I've told her that I'm here for her and love her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jayanna Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 I think you've already done it. Don't bring it up unless she does. If she does bring it up, let her know that her cousin is someone she will see again in the future. She can perform her baptism in the temple someday. Give her something to look forward to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwen Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 (edited) there was an article in a recent new era about how to help someone that has lost a loved one. edit: it's called "when i became invisible" feb issue. some advise i've heard is don't ignore the person because you don't know what to say and don't be afraid to talk about the person (if a positive memory or something comes up) that is gone. i think it tends to hurt ppl when they feel like everyone wants to forget they existed. remembering can be hard but it's less painful than forgetting. Edited March 20, 2011 by Gwen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Backroads Posted March 20, 2011 Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 I would actually ask if she DOES want to talk about it. Often, people in mourning do, but don't know how to ask for it. Then they feel bad because everyone else is "avoiding" the subject. She's in a fragile state right now, so it will be up to you to ask blatant emotional questions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lizzy16 Posted March 20, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 20, 2011 there was an article in a recent new era about how to help someone that has lost a loved one. edit: it's called "when i became invisible" feb issue.some advise i've heard is don't ignore the person because you don't know what to say and don't be afraid to talk about the person (if a positive memory or something comes up) that is gone. i think it tends to hurt ppl when they feel like everyone wants to forget they existed. remembering can be hard but it's less painful than forgetting.I remember reading that article. It was a really good one. thanks :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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