Lindy Posted August 15, 2006 Report Posted August 15, 2006 Another sssssllllloooooooowwwww news day:Pothole Repaired on Judson Road in South Richmond - headline, Richmond Times-Dispatch, July 26 OHHHH now THAT is a very sad news day....LOL"Extensive collection of Soviet military surplus for sale by newly independent republic. Wide selection of armor, jets, light naval vessels, and fissionable materials at bargain prices. All sales "as is", lingering radiation on some items. Buyer pays delivery expenses.""For sale: a quilted high chair that can be made into a table, pottie chair, rocking horse, refrigerator, spring coat, size 8 and fur collar.""For Sale - Eight puppies from a German Shepperd and an Alaskan Hussy" Quote
Dr T Posted August 15, 2006 Author Report Posted August 15, 2006 Hi Lindy, LOL. Looks like e-bay is diversifying!! Quote
Dr T Posted August 15, 2006 Author Report Posted August 15, 2006 From the Department of "You Don't Say":Motoring Tip: Stop Before Switching Drivers - headline, MSNBC.com Quote
MBASS Posted August 15, 2006 Report Posted August 15, 2006 gotta be careful of the alaskan hussies....they are very dangerous! I hear you look at them and they have puppies! Quote
Dr T Posted August 15, 2006 Author Report Posted August 15, 2006 AAA Says Record Gas Price Predictions May or May Not Come True - headline, Kingsport (Tenn.) Times-News, July 20Good thing AAA narrowed down the options for us... Quote
Dr T Posted August 17, 2006 Author Report Posted August 17, 2006 This just in:"The people that are being killed, the soaring murder rate is in places where there's violence." - Jefferson Parish, La., Sheriff Harry Lee, quoted by WWL-TV (New Orleans), Aug. 16 (I saw someone else quote this today-thought I'd share) Quote
Dr T Posted August 20, 2006 Author Report Posted August 20, 2006 Study Shows Doctors Miss Flu in Children - headline, Associated Press, July 5Wouldn't you know it; kids do not seem to miss it one bit. Quote
Dr T Posted August 20, 2006 Author Report Posted August 20, 2006 Another slow news day in Jackson County, AL:Camper asks for help at campground I wonder if what was heard was, "Please pass me that tent stake." I don't know, maybe it was, "Son, can you go gather more fire wood?" :) Quote
Dr T Posted August 21, 2006 Author Report Posted August 21, 2006 If you all thought self help groups are not effective...Polygamous possums turn to pairing for life from New Scientist International Aug. 19, 2006think again. :) Dr. T Quote
Dr T Posted August 23, 2006 Author Report Posted August 23, 2006 Analyzing Troubling Surge of 'Takeover' Robberies in the San Fernando ValleyQuestion: There have been more than 200 "takeover" robberies of restaurants and other businesses over the last year. Why has this become such a problem? From LA Times 8/23/06 Um.....Maybe because, people don't like being taken over and robbed? Just a guess... Side note: Takeover Robberies="Usually, they involve masked and armed robbers swarming a business. The assailants often make a dramatic gesture, such as holding a gun to someone's head. They take cash and other valuables — not just from the till but also from employees and patrons."Dr. T Quote
Dr T Posted August 23, 2006 Author Report Posted August 23, 2006 Ukraine Leader Promises Not to Siphon Russian Gas from New York Times 8/23The Ukraine’s new prime minister, Viktor F. Yanukovich was heard to say, "My darn hose is too short anyway!!" Dr. T Quote
Dr T Posted August 24, 2006 Author Report Posted August 24, 2006 Killer's Cold Case From the '80s Runs Hot and Cool - L.A. Times 8/24/06That must be one heck of a cold! Fevers and chills since the 1980's... Well, maybe that's what he gets for killing people...Dr. T Quote
Dr T Posted August 24, 2006 Author Report Posted August 24, 2006 Designer Brings More Ritz to the Table LA Times 8/24/06My only question about this is, "Why didn't they have the waiter bring the crackers to the table?" Quote
Dr T Posted August 27, 2006 Author Report Posted August 27, 2006 Virgin Woman Sentenced for Unlawful Sex - headline, Associated PressWait... What? Quote
daenvgiell Posted August 27, 2006 Report Posted August 27, 2006 some of those things are really funnyCAUTION: hard hat does not protect child's head. Quote
Lindy Posted August 27, 2006 Report Posted August 27, 2006 "For sale to kind master. Full grown domesticated tigress, goes daily walk untied, and eats flesh from hand." "Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Salary and Blue Cross." "Low cost, single bedroom one-story riverside home for sale. Low contamination, quiet neighborhood with no children or animal life. Contact regional EPA department." Quote
Dr T Posted August 27, 2006 Author Report Posted August 27, 2006 It is really good to see you contribute Daenvgiell and Lindy. I know that some of them are dumb and some of them really amuse me. :) I'll keep posting them as they come up. If no one enjoys them, I'll take the hint. Thanks Quote
daenvgiell Posted August 28, 2006 Report Posted August 28, 2006 It is really good to see you contribute Daenvgiell and Lindy. I know that some of them are dumb and some of them really amuse me. :) I'll keep posting them as they come up. If no one enjoys them, I'll take the hint. ThanksNo worries, I like reading things that make me laugh. If I find anymore I'll post them up Quote
Dr T Posted August 28, 2006 Author Report Posted August 28, 2006 The small Dutch town of Drachten has installed a children's playground in the middle of one of the roads to force drivers to slow down. http://www.dw-world.de/dw/article/0,2144,2143663,00.htmlWho’s bright idea was it to think that kids would make great speed bumps?!? Yes, I see the importance of slowing down but isn't one of the main reasons to "PREVENT PEOPLE FROM GETTING HURT?" I'm glad I don't live there. Dr. T Quote
Lindy Posted August 28, 2006 Report Posted August 28, 2006 The small Dutch town of Drachten has installed a children's playground in the middle of one of the roads to force drivers to slow down. http://www.dw-world.de/dw/article/0,2144,2143663,00.htmlWho’s bright idea was it to think that kids would make great speed bumps?!? Yes, I see the importance of slowing down but isn't one of the main reasons to "PREVENT PEOPLE FROM GETTING HURT?" I'm glad I don't live there. Dr. TI agree.... it was a decent article...one I just shook my head at though..... A lot of traffic accidents in my area the last couple of weeks..... too many needless deaths. Hard to think of children getting hurt because of some adults brilliant idea gone wrong. Quote
Dr T Posted August 29, 2006 Author Report Posted August 29, 2006 'They Say I Ate My Father. But I Didn't' -L.A. Times 8/28/06The 5 year old said, as she burped and politely said, “excuse me.” "They say I ate my father. But I didn't. I'm not a witch." In all fairness, she is a 5 year-old and may be telling the truth. Or then again, maybe she just doesn’t know that “witch” and “cannibal” are not synonymous. Dr. T Quote
Dr T Posted August 29, 2006 Author Report Posted August 29, 2006 This just in from Beijing, according to the Xinhua news agency: Dog unable to drive Just thought you all needed to know about this newsflash. Dr. T Quote
Guest MrsS Posted August 30, 2006 Report Posted August 30, 2006 Could you please include the links to your news headlines. Thank you. Quote
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