I'd really like to comment on the 'baptism for the dead' inquiry, mhansen. It is a very beautiful and moving ceremony that a member can do for their loved ones who have passed. I felt very bonded to my relatives when I went and performed their baptisms. It was a very moving experience for me. I truly felt the Holy Spirit was there and the peace and comfort I felt was almost overwhelming. I didn't want to leave the temple.
As it was explained to me by my very wonderful bishop, our loved ones have a choice. We do the work, but they do not have to accept it. It's not forced upon them. However, it is a gift that we give to them. At least that is how I believe it to be.
My father and grandmother were never given the opportunity to be baptized. It really wasn't available to them and my grandmother was far to shy and insecure to ever go through a church baptism. Her shyness was crippling. However, she is was baptized through me in the temple and it was truly a beautiful. It's a bit to hard to explain, so I'll just call it the "unexplainable, mysterious, presence of God."