mdfxdb
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Posts posted by mdfxdb
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In my mind our distinction as a church is our claim to authourity. We as a church say we are the "true" church because we claim the authourity to act in Gods name.
In our church history we know that Peter, James, and John restored the priesthood to Joseph Smith. It is through that apostolic authourity that we maintain our correctness.
Other churches may or may not teach correct doctrine, but even if they have correct doctrine they do not have the authourity to act in Gods name.
From a historical perspective the restoration of the Priesthood makes us unique, and true.
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If the answer is from God. Then NO.
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My husband is abusive. Verbally, emotionally, sometimes physically.
I agree, there are no absolutes. The three A's are guidelines only, and need to be applied on an individual basis per individual circumstances. However, in this case the OP cited physical abuse. Seems pretty cut and dry to me.
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Abuse
Audltery
Addiction
You have abuse it's one of the 3 A's that justify divorce. It's a judgement call, but no one should have to live with abuse.....ever.
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just play poker. it's not gambling
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Saw this article posted here by another: A True and Sufficient Love - Ensign Feb. 1979 - ensign
it's excellent.
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What happens when we have an already inflated dollar become useless to other countries because USA currency becomes the non standard? They won't accept it. Its useless. Than we owe china a huge debt. Which we pay or suffer consequences. Its already almost useless. An inflated meaningless dollar, poeople will lose everything in the banks almost.
Why such a worry about if we owe money to China? So we owe them money...who cares. We are going to pay them in dollars and if they wont accept our worthless dollars then so what? What are they going to do about it? Collect?
There will be no government melt down, there will be no militia state. Things can't work that way if we want the fullness of times to come to pass.
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options as I see them:
- do nothing (I like this one)
- Pick a side (make sure our side wins)
The do nothing option is the best because we can then deal with the winners. We've already lost face because our foreign policy stinks. Nobody is going to believe anything we do. Even if we do throw a couple of missles at them, so what? What have we proven? We're just making a forceful statement that they should kill eachother in a civilized manner and not use gas?
The winners of this conflict will have to deal with us at some point. It's too late for action now, but when we are dealing with the winners of the conflict we let them know our terms for behavior, and if they don't comply then we turn the place into a desert. We don't ask permission from the UN, we don't give warnings, we act. Anything short of that and we have nothing, and we are better off not getting involved period.
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Yeah what little money I make I am not going to waste it on a date I won't enjoy with someone I probably don't like
I have no qualms borrowing money from female friends or letting the woman pay for dates if she is better off then I am.
why should I? Because someone tells me I should, I get told a lot of things, but doesn't mean I think they are true or I should listen/believe them
rotflmfao You sound like a fun date. Hope you have fun "hanging out"
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Often times in life we see where our priorities exist.
True, gender roles are changing, and women are becoming more educated and making more money. However, they are women, not men. They think differently, they react differently, they are different down to their very cores.
We can try to pretend that we are equal, but we're not. Granted, we as men might have to forego purchasing the latest "madden 2013" for xbox so we can pay for a date. We do not ask women to make those same sacrifices even if they make good money. Is it fair? Does it matter? Absolutely not.
For the OP I suggest you ask the guy out.
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yep, call me old fashioned, but the guy should pay for the first date regardless of who asks...
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You are twitterpated right now. If he is intersted he will ask you out. Flirt with him, ask him out if you want. If he doesn't pay for the first date, even though you asked him out then you will know what kind of person he is.
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I agree with MRMARKLIN. Addiction is grounds for divorce. Your covenant is with God, as is his. He is not keeping his covenant, thus depriving you and your family of blessings. He is the priesthood holder of the household, he has obligations to you and to his family. Unless he is going to live up to those obligations you have no reason to hang around and wait. There comes a time when you need to pull up the stakes and move on. I do not know if you have reached that point, that is something only you can decide. No one can dictate to another when that time has arrived. If you have made ultimatiums in the past then I suggest you follow through, otherwise they are worthless.
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I believe in repentence and redemption. What of it? How many times should you allow the offending party to repent? How much should someone have to put up with? I don't know the answer. We can only respond to generalities. Some people have a higher pain threshold than others. And even if you are willing to tolerate no end of misbehavior how much should someone's children have to tolerate? They have no control over the situation.
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This is my two cents worth and that is all it really is worth.
For those of you who are willing to accept ongoing infidelity of a spouse, male or female, how do you do it? For those who are sisters who have husbands who cheat and sleep with other women and then come home to you, do you have them tested first? Are you willing to catch whatever they have and perhaps lose your life while you still have children at home who rely on you, heck or ever. A man who sleeps with a woman other than his wife sleeps with all the other men she has slept with and true the other way around too.
I hear that you want to have a Celestial marriage. My idea of working towards a Celestial Marriage is two people working in the same direction towards a common goal. I don't believe that death will change someone. They are not going to become a Celestial partner when they die. The same traits they had in this life will move on to the next. Same nature.
Sorry if it seems a bit harsh but I believe that a lot of people want to gloss over gross sin with the hope of being someone's Celestial partner and I don't believe that is how it works.
Ben Raines
worth more than 2 cents. People don't change. When you stay with a spouse that cheats, or has grevious sins, you are teaching your children that it is ok to tolerate that kind of behavior. Not only are you ruining your life, but you are tainting theirs.
There is talk of "keeping covenants" Covenants require both sides for them to be kept. You will never be an eternal companion with someone who does not keep their covenant.
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She is not your wife. You cannot do anything more than be a friend. The end. You are doing yourself, and her a disservice by not telling her NO right now.
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Why would you even say 2 words to him again? Stop it. Don't reach out to him, and if he reaches out to you don't answer/respond
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He is abusing you. 13 years is enough. Think about what you are teaching your children, think about their perceived role models. Is that what you want?
My advice.....get out.
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Here is the deal. The only person you can change is you. You cannot change him. You need to decide what you want to live with now, and in the eternities. If you feel that he can change, and he has the desire to change then I encourage you to seek professional help. If he is unwilling to admit a problem or unwilling to see a problem from your point of view then you will have a big decision to make. How long are you willing to wait for him to change? How much infidelity/lies are you willing to put up with? Adultery, Addiction, and Abuse are all very legitimate reasons for divorce. Which of those are you willing to put up with?
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I agree that Bishop is not at fault. He suggested counseling. Your husband didn't do that. Why would he have done anything else? Bishops are just guys, they aren't trained for counseling. They do the best they can with their life experience, or lack thereof.
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I'll admit, looking at your timeline my first thought was you did this on your mission?
any advise? yeah: get married.
Seriously, stop thinking about it, the more you think about it, even in a negative way, the more likely you are to do it.
Once every 6 months does not really sound like you can not control this. If you start thinking about doing it, distract yourself.
You are not even close to having a problem. If you are feeling bad then talk to someone, but don't beat yourself up about it. As stated above. Just distract yourself.
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I appreciate your words of counsel... I will continue to pray for guidance and seek my Heavenly Father to help find what He would guide me to do. In the meantime, I find it so hard to get thru the day and constantly wonder where we stand. I am tempted to put a recorder in his car to see if I can learn more... but then i know that is not the right thing to do. I need to be honest to expect him to be honest... but its killing me not knowing if he loves me at all anymore. Thanks again!
He is not exhibiting the behavior of someone who loves his wife. Think about that. Love is shown. The easiest thing in the world to do is say "I love you". The hardest thing is to actually do it.
Don't waste your time trying to follow him, or snoop. He has stated where he is at. Where are you? Are you ok where he is at? Can you live with that for the rest of your life? For eternity?
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Sounds like he's a liar, and at a minimum he is having an emotional affair. His lack of desire to be physically intimate is an indication to me of a physical affair. You can want to be with him all day long, but if he does not want to be with you then you are spinning your wheels.
I suggest you go to him for clarification, and set some ground rules for what your expectations are of him as far as a husband and companion. If he cannot comply then you will have some hard decisions to make. A for Adultry is one of the 3 A's as grounds for divorce.
rotflmfao
3 months married and he's already watching pornography...
in Marriage and Relationship Advice
Posted
You've dated for 8-9 months, been married for 3..... You say none of these actions were present before dating, but I can tell you those behaviors don't just happen by accident. He may have not been as completely forthright with you as he should have been when you were dating.
He needs to confront those problems. I think a conversation with your bishop may be in order. I would hesitate to say he needs addiction recovery programs....from what I have read in the prior posts it is too soon to say if he is an addict or not.
On a deep level he wants to make this better because he confessed it to you, and he got caught with porn on his computer. If he were serious about his "porn" problem he might have made it a little bit more difficult to get caught. This is of course just a guess on my part.