slamjet

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  1. A MOTHER’S JOB DESCRIPTION (author unknown) A few months ago, when I was picking up the children at school, another mother I knew well rushed up to me. Emily was fuming with indignation. “Do you know what you and I are?” she demanded. Before I could answer - and I didn’t really have one handy - she blurted out the reason for her question. It seemed she had just returned from renewing her driver’s license at the County Clerk’s office. Asked by the woman recorder to state her “occupation,” Emily had hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself. “What I mean is,” explained the recorder, “Do you have a job, or are you just a ……?” “Of course I have a job,” snapped Emily. “I’m a mother.” “We don’t list “mother” as an occupation… “housewife” covers it,” said the recorder emphatically. I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself in the same situation, this time at our own Town Hall. The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high-sounding title, like “Official Interrogator” or “Town Registrar.” “And what is your occupation?” she probed. What made me say it, I do not know. The words simply popped out. “I’m….a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations.” The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in mid-air, and looked up as though she had not heard right. I repeated the title slowly, emphasizing the most significant words. Then I stared with wonder as my pompous pronouncement was written in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire. “Might I ask,” said the clerk with new interest, “just what you do in your field?” Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, “I have a continuing program of research (what mother doesn’t) in the laboratory and in the field (normally I would have said indoors and out). I’m working for my Masters (the whole darned family) and already have four credits (all daughters). Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities (any mother care to disagree?) and I often work 14 hours a day (24 is more like it). But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are in satisfaction rather than just money.” There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk’s voice as she completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door. As I drove into our driveway buoyed up by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab assistants—age 13, 7, and 3. And upstairs, I could hear our new experimental model (six months) in the child-development program, testing out a new vocal pattern. I felt triumphant. I had scored a beat on bureaucracy. And I had gone down on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than “just another……” ------------------ I was a stay-at-home dad for six years. I have a bit of experience in this arena. If she stay's at home, she will have NO time for anything else, nor would she want to do anything else. Staying at home is so overwhelming. But the rewards are enormous for doing the world a whole lot more good than trying to earn more of a paycheck and your kids will remember mom being at home for the rest of their lives into eternity. It will make a huge difference to them, it will be a HUGE blessing to your family. It is a HUGE blessing to be at home with them while having a husband who is a provider. It's just not that common these days. She should stay with the children and not worry the other stuff. Heavenly father loves mothers (sometimes I think more than dads) and has very special blessings set aside for them. Just don't forget to support her. She never leaves the office. She will need your attention, your listening ear, your compassion, and your help. Your family will be better off for it.
  2. I'm seriously thinking of starting a blog kind of thing (I already have the domain name) about what I had to go through to get to where I'm at. I've found that there are so few internet sited talking about a Mormon with huge experiences with sexual addictions. Someone (a famous author) told me that I have a story that a lot of people would want to hear. So I thought I'd start up a web site, but I've become a bit shy about being so out there with my story. Would you do it? Any thoughts?
  3. When there was a rumor going around that my old man was going to be the next bishop in our ward, I asked him about it and then he pointed to a member of our ward (welfare member, to the core. We found out he was also a member of other churches to get hand outs). He then said that he is one reason why he would NEVER be Bishop. The current Bishop at that time had to bring him into his office and tell him (command him actually) to take a shower. My old man (and me for that matter) would not have been nice about it. So Bishop he never became, but he was a branch president, high counsel, lots of bishop counselors and clerks and now Patriarch. Go figure.
  4. Bottom Line: How strong is your desire to come back into the fold? As a woman, you will stand in judgment in front of the Bishopric. Even at that, if you have set aside your "wilder, earthly, carnal" ways, then there is a good chance a court would not have to be called at all. The only way I could see that a definite court would be called would be if you began to be sexually "free" while you were still married. I'm an ex'd member. But I had to stand and answer for my acts in front of the Stake Presidency and the High Counsel. My experience with them-all is first, the court is a forgotten subject with the High Counsel. Second, with my Stake President and Bishop, my desire to get back into the church and HUGE struggle with a whole host of personal demons along with the progress I've been making (blessings be to God for his intimate involvement in my life), I've been blessed with a healthy respect from them. Now you may stub your toe. The month before, as I found out, my Stake President was going to call the council together to bring me back into the fold, I messed up royally! The look of disappointment all around was heartbreaking. But they did not toss me aside. I'm struggling right now, but I'm grateful for the healthy respect and support from my leaders. This respect can only come if you have an honest, open dialog with your leaders. Start with your Bishop and let him guide you along. And don't forget he's human. He's going to say something that will tick you off. But keep the bigger message in mind. Log-winded answer, but I hope you get what I'm driving at.
  5. If you were baptized AND confirmed later in live (9 years and older) your records stay active. If you were baptized and NOT confirmed, your records are removed and have no records, if records were made at all. If you were blessed as a child and not baptized at 8 years, your records are removed at age 9 and you have no records.
  6. Ex'd member working my way back. Been to hell and back and working on getting my warped self back into one piece. I apologize in advance for forthrightness bordering on rude. Lack of tact, my #1 character weakness.