Hikchick

Aside from the others who have mentioned that meds work, drink a pop with lots of caffeine. Something like Mt. Dew, Coke, Dr. Pepper... the caffeine dilates your blood vessels in the brain and allows them to accept a better blood flow. That is how Excedrin can call themselves the migraine medicine, they use caffeine as an ingredient to help get rid of your headache. Best of luck, I know how debilitating they can be.

Great to see you 2, Doc! Oh brother! Mr. Winking Eyeball sure likes to see himself type - and such big words too. M. LOL I did get a good kick out of that one! LOL

I can't say that there is anything that stands out by leaps and bounds in front of anything else. However, I have to say that feeling the Spirit is quite addicting! :)

I don't mean to be rude here, but that's like saying you don't mind eating a little bit of dog poop in with your brownie. If it's bad, it's bad. Will it be allowed in Heavenly Father's home? Nope. Why? It's not clean. And "No unclean thing" is allowed in His presence.

Thanks guys! I appreciate the insight here. It makes it easier to understand. Having been raised in the church I had never heard anyone ask for this in a public prayer before. Maybe that's why I felt uneasy, because it was something outside of the box (for me, anyway). I have no problem asking for forgiveness or repentance. I just always thought it was my own personal job to do it and for some reason felt wierd when someone asked for me. What I am seeing now, is that he is doing it because he recognizes the need for us all, and not because he is pointing a finger at anyone. Thanks again!

I've just read the last few posts before my last one. To be honest I've never felt threatened by any other woman no matter how close they have become as friends or anything else. There is no jealousy with the time he has spent with Tammy, either. Like I've said before, it's just a feeling of pure fear that I get. If I felt threatened by the way she looks, dresses, acts, etc., I would just ask my husband to avoid her. However, she has never done anything to make me doubt she is anything other than a good woman. I have the same feelings about my husband. I don't doubt that he has made his covenants to me and me to him. The only reason that I say I fear something arising is that I know as humans we are not perfect and to stick your head in the sand is only pretending that the problem isn't there and will go away on it's own. Rosie, Our communication is AWESOME! We've worked really hard in the last 10 years to know that no matter what we can talk to each other about ANYTHING! I only have thought of what might happen because of this fear. I know my husband isn't looking or wanting. Also, it's not herself that has had mental health issues.... it is her daughter. I'm not worried about that if either one of them were to be affected. I am bipolar myself and understand mental illness. I have a great doctor and am doing great on the meds that I have. Again, I really don't feel insecure about or around her... why? Simply because I know my husband loves me and has taken his vows with me. I just always come back with the feeling of danger and fear. BTW, I trust him fully as far as whom he spends his time with and where he works, etc.

I haven't read the last few posts, but I thought I'd add that there have been other women that are "a perfect woman" before. I have never felt these feelings with anyone other than Tammy, no matter who or what the others have been like. Also, there have been women who have come on to my husband and he has always chosen the right path and gotten himself out of the situation asap. I don't know what it is about Tammy that gives me this feeling.

While I do have insecurities in some areas, it's not that I feel threatened by her. I am quite comfortable with my relationship with my husband. We've been together now for 10 1/2 years. He never dated another woman after we met (Even though the opportunity was there.) He simply stated that he never had the desire to pursue a relationship with another woman. (There is an exeption of one gal, though she never wanted to date him, so there was no follow through.) The only thing that I can put my thumb on about this is that it's like setting out chocolate cake in front of someone who's been dieting and knows they shouldn't eat it. The temptation is strong. No matter how many times you try to refuse the cake, the fact that a perfect desert is still sitting in front of you is quite tempting. I know my husband has no desire to be with anyone else. I know that his heart is with me as is mine with him. I am not insecure in this area of our lives. My fear, I guess, is that of what could happen just because of temptation. I know he won't go seeking anything, but that doesn't mean it's not out there to be seen or had. I guess knowing that there are no guarantees is what makes me super nervous. He knows that to me a kiss is just as bad as intercourse. Cheating is cheating, and I won't stick around afterwards. It would be over. The reason that I say this is because I don't think I could forgive him for that and it probably wouldn't be fair to him to have to live a life sentence no matter how many times he would ask for forgiveness. I don't believe that would be fair to us or our children.

*Hikchick starts singing* "There is beauty all around, when there's love at home! There is joy in every sound when there's love at home! Peace and plenty here abide, Smiling sweet on every side... Time doth softly sweetly glide when there's love at home! Love at Home... Love at home. Time doth softly sweetly glide, when there's love at home!" :)

I can't even tell you how closely your story hit home! Before I married my husband we were told that it would be difficult for me to get pregant. Using the miracles of today's medicine we were able to get pregnant, only to lose the baby a few months in. Miraculously we were able to get pregnant again. About 2 1/2 months into my pregnancy I was put on bed rest. My body was fighting the pregancy like it was the plague. It kept on wanting to deliver early. When I was 20 weeks along they finally started me on meds to fight the labor. At 26 weeks I dilated to a 6 and was life flighted to University of Utah Hospital. I stayed there for 2 months while they fighted to keep my son from being born. I never hesitated to believe that he would be born at full term because a preisthood blessing said that he would be born at full term. After my 2 months in the hospital I was allowed to return home with a medical transport. Finally at 38 weeks, my son Aaron was born. Because I had already been dilated to a 6 (once it raises it won't lower) my delivery was quite rushed. They gave me a shot for pain and shortly after he was delivered. The shot that they had given me pretty much knocked me out. I tried so hard to stay awake, but couldn't. Approximately an hour later I remember my husband holding my hand and gently telling me that Aaron wasn't completely whole and needed to be transported to Primary Children's Hospital (right next to U of U Hospital) via life flight. So once more we found ourselves in a hospital with more complications. They have never been able to fully diagnose his problems. Here is where I learned my lesson. While they were running every test ever known to mankind to try and figure out what was wrong, I was busy telling the Nurse Practitioner (he was in charge of ordering all the tests and whatnot) that one of the problems he was looking for would not exist in my child. How did I know this? His preisthood blessing said it wouldn't be there. I fought tooth and nail for this test not to be performed because it was quite invasive. I remember sitting on a chair in the x-ray room with my wonderful and angelic Mother on one side and my husband with a reassuring hand on my back on my other side. I remember wearing the heavy apron that helps to eliminate exposure to x-rays and feeling like it was dragging me down as I watched 2 people tie my son to a board and then hold him down while he screamed and fought to be released while the doctor inserted a tube into his stomach to inject a radioactive dye. I remember wanting to just pick him up and run for home. The next few minutes were heartwrenching for me. I heard the doctor say, "Yup, he has it!" Meaning he had the exact problem that his blessing said he wouldn't have. I pounded my fists into my lap, sobbing uncontrolably and saying, "Why!?! WHY!?!!" I am not proud of my next thought, but it has been where my testimony both floundered and then grew. The very thought that entered my head was, "I can't believe that everything I've ever believed in my whole life has been a lie!" I was sure that because this test had revealed a problem that the preisthood blessing was false and then so would be the power that it came from. Within seconds, the doctor retracted her statement and said, "Nevermind, he doesn't have it. I misread it. He doesn't have an H-fistula!" That very moment I knew I had sinned greatly in doubting my Heavenly Father. I knew there would need to be repentance. Aaron has been given many blessings from the time of conception to his wonderfully rowdy and adorable days of now. One that was given when he was an infant was that some day he would be whole. I thought that day would take 15 or 20 years. He is 5 1/2 and will be whole within a few months when his feeding tube is removed. I remember all the therapists that he saw. The hard work that he had to put forth to try and give him every opportunity to be healthy. It hurts when you see the struggles that your children have to endure. I had a hard time with my Bishop when he would ask how Aaron was. I would tell him and then would feel that he didn't understand the gravity of what we were living through. We too, have used the Bishop's storehouse. I felt quite often that he didn't want to say yes when we would ask for help. I felt withdrawn from him and the church when I was on bedrest for 56 weeks in less than 2 years for my son's pregnancy and my daughter's pregnancy (she was a gift from God! Even though the doctor's said no more babies for at least 3 years!) Heavenly Father knew she was needed earlier than that! LOL I remember being on bed rest for about 3 months (with my daughter)before our Relief Society President inquired as to why we hadn't been to church? Were we choosing to be inactive? NO! I remember my blessing with my daughter's pregnancy. It specifically stated that I was to obey my doctors and my blessings. The moment I chose to ignore or stretch the boundary, she would be born. At 35 weeks I was given permission for low mobility. That night my husband's family invited us to dinner. I went knowing I might be stretching the privlege. She was born the next morning. Throughout the time that I was on bed rest for both pregnancies, the time that I had to spend at home with a child that wasn't ready to be around so many people and diseases and even regular illnesses, and then through another full pregnancy we were considered to be "inactive". I had butted heads with the Bishop before. It wasn't fun, I didn't relish knowing that I would be seeing him every time I went to church. (Sorry about being so long winded.) Here's where I can say that I relate to you. If you for one moment let the feelings of frustration come between you and the leadership in your ward, you are handing the reins over to Satan. He will have control over your frustration and discouragement. PLEASE!!! DO NOT GIVE HIM YOUR POWER! I know that humility is the answer here. You can wish all you want that your Bishop will understand. That is what feels like the ultimate solution here. (I know I'm being blunt, but I don't mean to hurt you.) The lesson that might need to be learned is to humble yourself. No matter how much we feel wronged, if we want to be able to forgive we need to have humility. I know I don't have much myself. I'll always be under construction! Just know that you are loved, even by people who only know you from a message board. Know that God trusted you so much He gave you a life that needed a strong, and willing mother to watch after her. She will need to see you with a testimony before she can have one herself. I have a picture of my son in the NICU that looks much like yours. There is a great saying.... "I didn't say it would be easy. I only said it would be worth it!" Don't give up on yourself, her, your family, and even on us. We need you!

My husband and I are into the outdoors (hunting, fishing, camping, riding horses, etc.). It is always a time for our family to be together and bond. We are pretty passionate about shooting our bows all together. It is quite enjoyable to see our two kids (a 5 year old and a 4 year old) as they excersize their brains and hands and eyes to be able to launch the arrow into the target. My husband's main form of income has been doing construction with his brother and father. When there hasn't been work he has worked part time in a bow shop. While working there he has been able to meet a woman (who I'll call Tammy). She is about 15-20 years our senior, however, she is drop dead gorgeous! She was born and raised in Dubai (on the Persian Gulf). She met and married her husband there. From what I have been able to gather she is a Christian woman. This is where it gets hairy... She has a daughter (I think she's 19) who was sent to a boarding school for troubled youth in a town about 2 hours from us. After completing her required education she decided to stay in our home town. She has some mental problems that has kept her mother by her side for the last few years. However, her husband is still in Dubai running their businesses. (Money is not an object for them.) So she stays here in Idaho with her daughter and her husband lives in Dubai. They only see each other about 3 or 4 times a year. As a fellow shooter she asked my husband for some advice on shooting and invited him out to her house to shoot. He asked if he could bring us along and she readily agreed to have us join them. I have never known her to act in an inappropriate manner, nor has my husband. But as we talked she mentioned things that she liked to do. Her exact words are words that my husband has said many times. In his opinion, his favorite type of woman is one who will get down and dirty playing in the outdoors and then can turn around and get all gussied up for a night on the town. FYI, I don't mind getting down and dirty, but I HATE wearing dresses. (It's all about the updraft you know! ) I have been around Tammy on more than one occasion and every time I come back with the most horrible feeling ever. An absolute ball of fear in my stomach. I only feel this way when I've been around her or if she goes into the shop while my husband is there. I don't feel that she is evil or has bad intentions, I just feel like she's alone (and probably quite lonely) and it would be extremely easy to fall into a pit of temptation. When an invitation is issued to my husband she always includes me and the kids with it. My gut feeling says run as fast as you can! And yet I don't want to make her feel snubbed, we even have talked about how to introduce her and her family to the church. My husband and I have discussed this matter quite a bit and he has told me that he has no desire to become involved in any inappropriate manner with anyone. We also talked about King David and how as a prophet he fell to temptation. When I asked him to elaborate he basically said that no matter how many good intentions he or she had, they are both human and are fallible. I understand this, but hate it at the same time. Should I turn tail and run or should we still spend time with her and her family (when they are available)? Should we befriend her? Or should I listen to that big ball of fear that says to get out of the way NOW! I don't feel that this is paranoia. Actually, I'm not quite sure what to feel or think, this is the first time that I've had to deal with this issue. Sorry this is all so long. Any suggestions would be helpful. Thanks!

My husband's parents were converted to the church a few years before he was born. (We are both in our early thirties.) Ever since I had met his family I noticed a few things that seemed odd to me. This one is the one that bothers me quite a bit. I've always thought that asking for forgiveness and repentance is a personal thing, yet when my husband's father ever says a prayer (with family or in church) he asks for "forgiveness for all our many sins". Am I wrong here? I know he doesn't mean any harm, but for some reason it bothers me quite a bit. Opinions are welcome, thanks!

I don't know if you've ever heard of this saying... but here goes. "If you can't sleep, don't count sheep. Talk to the Shepard." I don't mean to sound harsh or cold, but I think if you asked Him to help you get more sleep (rather than asking us if He can help you) you'd have better results. I sit here at 4:05 in the morning... I have the same issues, however, I am able to rely on some meds to help. Also, don't hesitate to ask for a blessing for some guidance. I know all of our prayers aren't always answered the way that we want them to be, but I do envy your time to learn so much! LOL You're already that much ahead of the rest of us! :) Good luck and God bless.

I think if you were to look in his eyes you would see him for what he is. Pure evil with a side of selfishness and hatred! I'm sure he would try to come around with honey toned speach and very tempting offers to be friends. What most people would think as harmless would be shocking when the snake bites. However, we all knew he was a snake before picking him up!

But if we forgive someone, does it mean that they have our trust again? So if we forget then we are vulnerable... I must admit that this one has me in a quandry! :S