Lee Seo Young

Thank you! I think I havent told in the post why i rejected the two guys. 1st guy - Explained to me later (coz we were texting for a few mos regularly) that if we ever end up together, he would like to get married in a year or so. Explained to me he was feeling kind of missing out something bc at 28, he isn't settling down still. I felt aghast by that. It was too quick, too straigthtforward. we havent even had our first date together! 2nd guy - Asked if he could court me. He's looking for a relationship. I said NO because college was taking a toll on me 2 years ago and maybe I was judgmental about him as well. (My fault, my fault). 2 years later, he asks me out now. Now i dont know why I would reject him. ...

Ask her and explore her feelings. What is driving her back from truly repenting? You mentioned she felt she couldn't repent because she already had a son. How about the other underlying reasons? Ask her too what is holding her back to see a Bishop. Some people prefer not to approach the Bishop because they feel embarrassed or shameful, or thought it is not necessary. From the looks of it, she has a desire to repent and go back to church, but something seems to be holding her back from approaching the Bishop. You may help by exploring her feelings and help from there. We should also consider that despite of the enlightenment and our admonition you may be providing to your sister, she also has the freedom to decide what she has to do. Maybe it won't be now, maybe in the future she will be better determined and prepared to repent. Sometimes, the Lord has His own timing. Your duty for now is to guide your sister in understanding the process of repentance so she can decide for herself. Dispel all the myths she has about repentance. Talk and demonstrate compassion and understanding. You may also inform a Church leader and ask for guidance on how you can better help her. Pray and find out through the Spirit how to be able to reach out to her. Tell her that the bishop holds the priesthood keys to help her to repent fully.

You have such a wonderful story. Thanks for sharing!!!!

Thanks for offering a guy perspective. Made me realize some things. I'll keep this in mind. Thank you!

Thank you so much. I realized a lot of things and maybe in the future, if I get invitations to dates again, I'll keep this in mind. I've thought there was something wrong about what I'm doing and you guys helped me out, thank you!

Had a block hit my head. I knew there was something wrong about being reluctant to first dates and always thought I was doing something contrary that involves the Lord (I cant phrase it well...) , so there it is, I received a confirmation. Thank you so much. Yeah, I need to do some 'practice' in order to prepare myself. And that involves overcoming my fears and anxieties with first dates. Thanks a bunch.

I advise her to speak to the bishop and to seek his guidance. She may have broken the law of chastity and had a son, but she can still repent fully. Repentance is going back to the path the Lord has set for us, and by going back, there are huge adjustments to make. The Lord will take care of her as long as she fully repents. I know He has a plan for her if she really decides to be an active member again. You can tell her her son will no way stop her from repenting. She had a son in effect of her decisions and actions but he is not a liability nor a negative thing in her life. Again, she can best speak with the Bishop about this matter.

Hey, I'm a 21-year-old sister. I was in a relationship with a nonmember when I was 19 and ended up breaking up because of stuff, and now I've been single for two years. I had two guys ask me out: one a RM who is 8-year-older than me and then another one who is also a member (he' 26 now). The latter guy asked me out again 2 years later (which is now) even after I rejected him before. He said he'd wait until I am available. :l I did reject the first guy (even though he liked me a lot) because I feel like I wasn't ready for a steady relationship and he seemed to be looking for a wife already. And I'm only 21, fresh out of college, and just started my new job. They only wanted a date, but I rejected them right away. They say first dates aren't supposed to be preoccupied about bc you're actually getting to know the person first before anything. I'm just afraid it will blow up into something serious and I don't feel ready for the responsibilities. Also, going on dates feels awkward for me. I'm also an introverted person and generally cautious of people and guys, especially after I had my first heartbreak :( Am I missing out on things? I visualize myself rejecting another guy who'll ask me out out of the same fears and feeling of not being prepared for the emotional and 'financial' demands of a possible relationship. I also live in a family where young adults being on a steady relationship at my age (or within the 20-23 year old age range) is being frowned upon because elders would say: You're too young to be committed OR you have to help your family first before dating OR you shouldn't be committed at that age yet OR wait until you're 25 or something. P.S. My family is mostly Mormons, but of course our culture also blends in.