Hello

@NeuroTypical yes I guess opt out may not be the right term however I used it in regards to those that I’ve notice that seem to have great faith and testimony and yet steer away from persuading their endowments. And it seems to be those who have been raised in the church rather than converts. As a convert I have been counting down the days. I can’t wait to be able to cross to that side of the Temple. To be able to receive and also to be able to perform all the ordinances for my relatives.

I’m a convert. My year is up in 3 weeks and I’m counting down until I can receive my endowments. I know some people opt out of endowments. Even some people at our ward who are very active in the church. So I’m curious as why people would opt out? This is not to look down on anyone in anyway. I just want to understand more about the whys and hows of the church.

Thank you. I am so new to all of this. I don’t know all the rules and I expectations.

Also I should note that I am a covert so this was ALL so new and foreign to me. I would cry and stress over this. So I hope this gives you some relief.

I have been in your shoes. My husband was sealed to his first wife and is applying for a sealings clearance. From the research I’ve found the sealing they had is no longer valid as once they broke their covenant to each other it broke the sealing however the man can only ask for a clearance as through the previous sealing this still allows his ex to keep her covenant that she made with Heavenly Father that day. And once we are sealed our sealing is the only valid sealing. She can apply for a cancelation once she is ready to remarry as she will then make a covenant with her new husband and Heavenly father at her next sealing. So don’t worry. You will be the only one with your spouse.

I’m a convert. My husband and I have been married over a year and are planning to get sealed once my year is up from my baptism. My question is mostly for the ladies! I have no one really I can ask. So I don’t plan to buy an actual wedding dress for the sealing and my civil wedding dress is not temple approved. Should I buy a nice white dress to wear to the sealing to take pictures in or is my white temple dress enough?

Thanks. I have ministering sisters. They’ve visited once. But it was awkward to say the least. I think it’s hard when they are all his ex’s former sisters and still her friends. It’s almost feels like they feel like it’s a betrayal to her if they are friends with me. Things got a bit easier after she changed wards but nothing really got better. Even men that talk to my husband will completely ignore me. But I do have a good relationship with the missionaries and keep a week day set for weekly dinners. They also help me attending sacrament and Sunday school.

I am a convert and my husband has always been a member. We have been married a year and this is both of our second marriage. We go the same ward him and his first wife attended during their marriage and shortly after their divorce before she moved to different boundaries. I have found that most of the women, even the men, in the ward do not address me or reach out to me. I smile. And try to say hi. But can feel that I’m an outcast. I’ve made it a point to attend sacrament and Sunday school because I can go with my husband. I feel safe. But have yet to branch out to RS. I would have no one to sit with or interact with. I suffer from some anxiety so that doesn’t help. My husband voiced his concern that he wants me to go to RS to not just be a member of the church but to be part of the church. But how do I do that when I feel unwanted? Please help.

No that’s not why they divorced. Too many issues to mention but nothing to that sort of effect however his ex has made it clear that she believes we were together before their divorce. We weren’t but you can’t reason with her. She blames me for their divorce even though they were separated for more than a year before we even met. So naturally we worry that she will convey this to the bishop and presidency out of spite and delay the cancelation.

Thank you @MarginOfError this was really helpful. It can be worrisome if you don’t know the process and the ex is spiteful regarding our marriage. My husband And I have went through all processes to repent for all past transgressions. He is a priesthood holder and has a standing temple recommend. We attend our meeting regularly and have weekly meeting with the missionaries (even now after my baptism as we love our elders and feel they still have so much to teach us!). Our main concern is that his ex would be spiteful simply because she doesn’t like me (that’s another topic for another day) and feels she is owned something because they were sealed together. We strive to live our life now to be worthy to be sealed together and to live as though we’ve already made that covenant.

From what I’ve read they interview her and have her submit a letter regarding her feeling about the clearance. And it is a fact that is taken to determine if the clearance is granted.

Thank you everyone. It’s a little overwhelming. And disheartening at times. I so badly want to be sealed. And it worries me that his ex could cause some conflict that wouldn’t let us get to that step. And it’s hard knowing that I have to wait. But eternity is worth waiting for.

The decision to ask for the clearance/cancelation has already been decided. No need for discussion there We were just told it was best to wait until I was a member but wasn’t sure if it was easier to way until I had my official recommend. Or did that come into play at all? He’s meeting with the bishop on Sunday. But we just were trying to get more information prior so we knew what to except.

So I am officially a convert... and am planning to be sealed to my husband. I know we have to wait a year from my baptism to be sealed BUT can he go ahead and ask for his clearance/cancelation now from his ex or is there an requirements beforehand? Do I have to have my temple recommend? I have a temporary one but of course not my official since I have to wait a year.

Any good BOM verse of the daily apps or devotional?

Thanks! I just got a feeling after hanging out with her that her and him would really click. I’d hate to miss an opportunity to introduce them if only as a casual hey y’all should be friends.

Would the last day she’s here be ok? I just hate to do it via social media. But she lives so far from me but close to him.

We have a sister missionary at our ward that I believe would be perfect for my bro in law. I know I can’t do anything now because she needs to focus on her mission but at what point could I say something?? Or is this just crossing too many lines.

@Blossom76 have you tried non denominational? It sounds like you’re a free spirit and you may flourish more at a church that helps you decide your own doctrines based on your own interpretation of the Bible. It’s not traditional but hey it works for some. A clear faith in Jesus is the foundation. Everything else were all just going on faith ?

@Blossom76 thank you for your concern and your sympathy. I think we can all agree that there are different beliefs sets. And that’s ok. It’s ok that you don’t agree with the practices of the LDS church and you don’t have to. Being new to the church I don’t know or understand all the practices either. And I do agree it is important for anyone to have a strong understanding of what they do and don’t believe. I wish you luck in whatever avenue you choice to go. And know that no matter what Jesus loves you. ❤️ Ps. Trying to convince someone that their beliefs aren’t true based on your non-beliefs is just a waste of your time. (I mean that with love and grace). Arguing over religion only brings hardened hearts and causes judgement. Neither of those are what Jesus wants.

@GruntI used the term because it’s what everyone else was using. I was just clarifying that I didn’t feel forced into so called polygamy. But by allowing one man to be sealed to multiple women it can be said that is a form of polygamy.

I think It’s important for discussion sake that I clarify that I knew going into my marriage that this would be a possibility. I knew my husband was sealed to another woman. I knew that there was a change before we even civilly married that I may never be sealed to my husband or if I did she could still be sealed to him as well. I didn’t feel forced into polygamy, I walked right in with my eye open because I knew without a shadow of a doubt that my husband was who I wanted to be with whether for time only or for eternity no matter what that entailed. However that doesn’t me that it doesn’t bother me. Like I said I’m human. I feel my husband is mine. And I want his love for me only. But if I have to share him it wouldn’t be with his ex because she doesn’t deserve to get to love him because she already had her chance and chose not to.

@harrypark I’m assuming your wife is LDS? If yes, then just be aware that by marrying you civilly she is giving up her ideal of a temple wedding given that she is marrying a non-lds member. So if that is the case, a church wedding seems to be a compromise. also it’d be beneficial to both of you if despite your non religious preference you did some research into her beliefs.

Also if you aren’t willing to compromises on this because your different belief systems then you two will have a long road ahead. This will just be one of many things that religious differences will become to play a role in. Especially if you have children.

I say happy wife happy life ? but in all seriousness if you don’t have any religious preference it stands that there should be no reasons why you wouldn’t get married in a church. It’s just a building if it has no religious meaning, correct? If it means that much to your wife and you love her then you should want to give her the wedding she dreams of. After all girls spend most of their childhood and adolescence dreaming about their wedding.