I don't know what to do. We have a temple marriage, going on 10 yrs. We have two young kids. It's just for the past several months especially I feel like I don't love my spouse anymore. I don't hate them; it's like being good friends with your roommate. I feel happier when it's just me and the kids. When they're around I feel indifferent, resentment, or irritated. I feel guilty about feeling this way.
I've tried spending time with them without the kids, I've expressed frustration at working and still doing both the all the child-rearing, housework, and yardwork, while he only works and sleeps. It's been that way for the entire relationship. I do all the house while he will occasionally help (and feels proud for cleaning once a month), I do all the yardwork because he "has allergies" (I do too), I take care of the vehicles, bills, doctors, school. The only thing he does with the kids is watch a show or do a video game. We've talked about this before, and nothing ever changes or the change is temporary.
Adding in the mix: I have depression and anxiety and he has ADD.
Recently, he has done laundry and dishes for a week, and then expected everything to change and for me to want to be with him, got upset when I didn't want to. I haven't told him that I can't say "I love you" back because I don't feel honest saying it. I don't want to hurt him. I don't want to hurt the kids.
I feel obligated to stay for my kid's sake, for my husband's feelings, for the church culture. I would be extremely embarrassed to mention this to the bishop. I don't really know him or feel comfortable around him. Part of me feels empty and not wanting to work on the marriage. What would you do?