Elgama

I'm just intrigued this was started by the one man who almost makes me regret being married lol

Lake District is beautiful, scenery in the UK is less dramatic than in the US though, I haven't been in 10 years but we used to go a lot when I lived in North of England

I am a Mum 24/7 even tonight when I was out for a few hours, I was concerned about something and had to check. I took off 8 hours from the week to allow for when Mum or my husband takes 1 or other of my tribe. I don't get sick days, I don't get holiday, I don't even get a lunch hour. When I go to bed its on the proviso I may not get to stay their all night I am still on duty. Even when my husband takes over he doesn't do my job the way I would do it, etc

Marriage is a two way street, I personally find forgiveness, friendship, are part of that love, My husband doesn't meet all my needs, sure I don't meet all of his, but we get along and strive to improve

believe me intrigued Housework has never been my priority in life I have much more to me than keeping the house looking nice, I'm quite happy to leave the house messy:) Actually part of what me being a SAHM does is give everyone more time, my husband has more time to relax because I can give him that, dinner is already done when he comes home etc which contributes to a more ordered evening. But its not the amount of work, its what is achieved by just being there, and given my children so far have 160 odd hours a week work from me over 5 years, quite frankly a year or two less fraught will be welcome

yeah always amazes me that people who go on about our life and restrictions, do in a style that tells us what we should be doing.

see my husband shares the housework, as well as the childcare outside of his work hours. Children are my job, but he wants them to know who their Dad is as well. My Dad never shirked his childcare or housework responsibilities either. If a woman wants or needs to work during that time fine, but I find your attitude undervalues your wife's role and what is best for any children, for some women working during this time is best because they need to do it to keep busy and feel better about themselves... But then if she is fine with someone who does not think being a Mother is a big deal and who does not think that actually just having a presence at home is valuable to their children during school time not to mention the difference it makes in his life then thats fine you'll work out, personally I think she would be a fool.

no not at all I am in the UK so we do have a civil ceremony first before the sealing. As a result when your non member family are with you, its the civil ceremony they are celebrating, not the sealing. Whereas if they support you in a temple wedding, its actually your wedding for eternity they are celebrating with you. Because of where we live in relation to the temple we were sealed the next day, as a result non member friends and family send cards for the 13th and expect any celebration then. I completely see the wisdom in only having a sealing if you can do that legally. The sealing ceremony is beautiful, simple and short. As a result its very easy for it to be overshadowed, I was unprepared for the sealing ceremony, I had never been to one, or I would have done the civil ceremony differently

I am currently inactive due to an abusive situation with my daughter and the primary president. I have had many blessings, one of which stated to step away, it says I will know beyond doubt when it is safe for her to return, and that this time will allow things to move forward. I oddly think my daughter was born for this situation, and will be the instrument in Heavenly Father's plan here. What we will be doing now we have the car back and summer is here is making the trip to another ward once or twice a month. I actually find it very hard to be inactive, I love the Lord and want to be at church. Its much harder not to go, than go and deal with consequences, but had we continued my daughter could have been lost for eternity, when someone came and tried to harrass us back to church a few weeks ago, she had a series of nightmares

Carli I think that is precisely why they discourage us having a civil ceremony, I have a strong testimony, value my husband etc but its very easy for the civil ceremony to overshadow the temple one

See now we have more questions than answers just for that one scripture lol I hate that the more I learn the less I know why I don't like testing my academic side:)

they need to read more Enid Blyton lol

I am sorry if I mis inferred but your post had a bitter tone to it, . I actually think your parents left themselves out, the chose not to come with you, they chose to see the ring exchanging as empty. Would a ring exchanging have been empty to you? They could have chosen instead to take part as fully as they could in your temple marriage, they could have come with you and had a spiritual time in the grounds, maybe even a picnic. I am not saying they are bad people, but they also made decisions that lead to their own tears and regret, I cannot envisage not supporting my children to my upmost if the tables are reversed, My husband's Father couldn't come to our wedding he was too ill to travel, of course he was disappointed but we had his blessing, support and love, it was too far for his Sister and neice. Your parents actively chose not to be present in the temple grounds. They are not bad people but part of this is down to their own decision when they decided to not fully support their child in a decision they had made.

yeah well my kids are homeschooled and so are an increasing number of children. And actually that is my number one reason for remaining a SAHM for my kids. If a child is going through a rough time at school, I am not compelled to leave them there, PMum's at home have more time to produce food for their family allowing them to eat healthier, more time to produce better FHE, when my kids are sick if they were at school fetching them home would be no effort, appointments are no concern. If my husband is sick he gets looked after better, basically if your family is your job you can be engaged in making your family better and more cohesive etc.

I have a contented happy marriage, we are good together make compromises and work together to bring our family up along the lines laid out in church handbooks I don't need to understand anyone elses model as long as my marriage is working with the three most important members of it, God, myself and my husband. It was ment as a joky expression only semi serious, if my husband had spoken the way you did on this board I would never have married him in the first place, it would make me feel like a slave and unloved:) I would find it disrespectful that my husband found housework beneath him and showed lack of appreciation for just how difficult child chasing is. But then he would be dismayed if I wanted money more than him at home, for me a happy household is about the people in it not the finances, once we have food in our belly, clothes on our body and roof over our head. Its great that it works for you, but personally I cannot understand a marriage where money and housework takes priority over each other and time together,

WWhich Law? as far as I am aware most of the world requires an education to be given to your children. Education does not = school, Some countries like Germanyits not the same my Mum was home, knowing if I was in trouble at school she was there was amazing. When I was bullied at school quite badly one day, I was able to step over the wall and walk home, knowing my Mum would be there to do something about the situation, if she had been at work miles away in town I couldn't have done that. Fact is my husband and I work together the children are OUR JOB, and the very best for them is Mum at home until they leave.

first who says kids have to go to school? And secondly I personally think its more important for a teenaged child to have a Mum at home than a preschooler, just knowing a parent is there can make a huge difference to a child. And if you are putting your effort into being a Mother surely that time can be used better for your children? and increasing your own knowledge and learning etc

nope:) but there is a difference we wouldn't be married in the eyes of the law if we entered the temple only thus violating the law of chastity. And actually having done it with a civil ceremony and a sealing ceremony straight after I understand better why its shouldn't happen. My Civil Ceremony was around 45 minutes it had harp music, reading of a commitment poem by my husband etc and it was truly beautiful and spiritual attended by family and friends. Having a quiet 15 minute ceremony the next day at the Preston Temple with only my Mother in Law, the offciator, and 2 temple appointed witnesses, more effort is required to think of that as my wedding, my first thought is often the glorious gorgeous day, It took practice to celebrate our wedding anniversary on the 14th rather than the 13th when everyone else sends us cards on the 13th etc. Keeping the temple sealing ceremony as your priority and focus when you have it straight after the civil ceremony takes a lot of effort. All your focus before is in preparing for the civil ceremony etc And even if it ment having a function that including my non member family and friends after the sealing ceremony, I personally wish I could have been sealed without the civil ceremony.

Like I tell my husband he works 40 hours a week, he gets 6 weeks holiday a year, and sick days, not to mention by law a lunch hour and a break every 3 hours. Raising small children is a 168 hour a week job, no holidays (well thats not true I just demanded a week off lol), no lunch hour, I get to eat usually punctuated with Mum can I have, I have to be really, really sick to get sick days etc, and when I do let him take over for a weekend or a week, I end up with a gigantic amount of housework because he never truly takes over lol

ok I am not good at intellectual if I don't have to be lol Do you have a body? Are You Alive or Dead? and do Satan and the Saviour contend over you?

lol especially as this one could cause a marital, just invite them in, show them love, because ultimately in your heart you know they are wrong, doesn't matter what they threaten you with:) personally I show anyone who knocks on the door the same courtesy I would want them to show our missionaries when they knock on their door, but I do also offer them a Book of Mormon:)

I don't understand why you don;t value your family eternally? You were unsure that your desire to be together forever would be present merely a year from your wedding day, and you now regret doing it the way you did. I appreciate the pain it caused your parents, maybe you could renew your vows and have wedding anniversary do. But your post indicates resentment for the sealing ceremony and really if being sealed to your own family for eternity is not the number 1 priority not sure what I am trying to say, but your post is full of bitterness and unforgiveness both on your part and your parents which is not condusive to the spirit In 2 years time I fully intend to have a ring exchanging and party for our 10 year anniversary as my Mum's stiff neckedness ment she wasn't at our wedding intially.

I have to say if my husband wrote this he's be out the door, my husband recognises that raising children is my job and its blooming hardwork, we had them together, and whilst I do the main part of the housework I have never ever had him moan when I struggled or blame it for not interacting with the kids, he can always kick a ball around in the garden with them, he picks up a mop and helps out. Having said that I am capable of managing on what my husband earns, personally would rather see him more than have him out earning more than we need, I actually miss him and so do the kids, my sons asked 4 times today when would Dad be home. Sure more would be nice but its not critical to our marriage.

generally find freedom of speech in the UK is pretty good, I seem to remember it was the US ambassador who complained about freedom of speech exercised by British Muslims on a TV show after 9/11. I'm willing to bet there is more to the story, Telegraph is a broadsheet but is also very Conservative

I know women for who having children and homemaking are an important part of who they are, and why shouldn't it be? I think of the story of Mary and Martha, Martha was only condemned for her way of serving when she said Mary's way of serving was wrong. We have needs of all kinds of women in the church, and for some raising righteous children with a smile on their face is there way of doing it. I'm not so bad at raising the kids but struggle with the smiling clean house bit:)