Should a disability keep someone from joining the LDS

[AndrewCothran]

I have a serious disability that limits my abilty to travel and attend on a regular basis the nearest ward or branch is thirty miles away .Attendance in order to fufill the requirements before baptisim would be a serious problem. I have discussed this in the past with members with missionaries even with the state mission president who discussed it with the stake president , after all of of beating around the bush from them which lasted over a year still i was back at the begining .. So i dont know who to talk to i dont know any solution to the problem.

[Misshalfway]

This sound strange to me....not the disability part.....just the finding a solution part. The Lord makes it clear that we shouldn't run faster than we have strength. Perhaps I don't know the details, but I would think there was a way. The Lord always makes a way for us to obey. :)

[AndrewCothran]

and honestly it is surprising ...

[FenderFan]

Hi Andrew,

The church is for everybody, regardless of personal circumstance. Have they exhausted all the ideas? I'll admit to feeling as Misshalfway does - the Lord will always help us to find a way.

Sometimes, though, even with the best will in the world, we are unable to attend our meetings regularly. If there is a good reason for this - and I am thinking of a close friend of mine now - it should not stand in your way.

Keep praying for a solution, I'm sure it is there, somewhere. Our Heavenly Father wants all of his children to return home to Him. Not just the ones that are healthy, wealthy and wise...

FF

[AngelonaWing]

Can someone offer you a ride to church? I do know the LORD knows the intent of your heart and will bless you for that. And your disability whatever it is should not keep you from being babtised...... My son has Autism.... he was baptized at age 10....... he bugged the bishop tell the he said yes! So we had the missionaries come and give him the discussions in a way he would understand . they drew simple drawings for him. I am not sure how much he understand but The Lord knew he did.. he was 24 before he was able to recieve the Priesthood. We have since moved from the ward where he was baptised but they wouldn't let him recieve the priesthood there........ In our New ward.. Our Bishop told he thought our son was ready..... He was so excited! He now is a deacon and I am hoping that somedayt they let him progress. I do know the Bishop is watching him.......... I will have to say that all things happen in the LORD"S Due Time.

Keep Praying and I am sure the Lord will provide a way.

[candyprpl]

I also find this incredibly strange! I was very sick and week -- I had been in the hospital for a month -- the missionaries visited me while in the hospital and when I got home was still too sick to attend church. I only attended once before I was baptized. I think it was clear to the missionaries and the Mission President that it was my intent to 'come unto Christ' and follow the teachings as best as I could.

3 Nephi 18:22-23 (Instruction from Christ)

22 And behold, ye shall meet together oft; and ye shall not forbid any man from coming unto you when ye shall meet together, but suffer them that they may come unto you and forbid them not;

23 But ye shall pray for them, and shall not cast them out; and if it so be that they come unto you oft ye shall pray for them unto the Father, in my name.

Yes, we are instructed to attend services and because of this I can't see (but I don't know much about the situation you are in) that a solution can't be accomplished if you are showing enough intent to obey, to the best of your ability.

Your disability should not keep you from joining the Church if that is your intent. I know many with sever disabilities who are more than just welcomed but have contributed much in their service to the church.:)

[BenRaines]

There is no hard and fast rule. It is according to circumstances. If you have a testimony and a desire to be baptized you can.

Ben Raines

[OneEternalSonata]

This seems odd to me, as I have a severe disability myself and was baptized just 3 years ago. All involved were very accommodating. There again, I can't say what the reasoning is for your situation because I'm without the information needed to do so. I sincerely hope you are able to be baptized soon, even though it will be the Lord's time. :)

[Elphaba]

From your post, I don’t get the sense they were completely dismissing your disability, but that they didn’t know how to address it. Is that accurate?

A few years ago I was involved in a project to determine how the Church accommodated people with disabilities. What I discovered was that if the disability was obvious, such as being in a wheel chair, the members went out of their way to make sure the person made it to Church, and was then comfortable during the meetings.

I also discovered that if the disability was a “hidden illness,“ such as mental illness, it was not acknowledged as a real disability, and very few accommodations were made for that member.

Of course, this makes sense, because the public in general do not understand there are hidden disabilities that are just as debilitating, and in my opinion, sometimes even more so, than the ones you can see with your eyes.

However, I do have an example of a sister's debilitating physical disability, and how her bishop was unsympathetic about her limitations. But before I begin, let me state emphatically that, in my survey, her experience was an anomoly. I do not believe all wards are like the one of which she was a member.

She had been born with her left arm missing from the elbow down. Additionally, she had severe carpal tunnel syndrome in her right arm, with essentially no cartilage left in her arm. This was extremely painful to her, as in some places it was bone to bone.

On top of that, she had adopted a little girl from a family member who could not take care of her. The child was half white, half black, and had inherited hair that was extremely difficult to comb, especially given the sister’s disabilities.

When I talked to her, she was always in tears, because her bishop was adamant that she could not get a temple recommend unless she consistently attended Church. At the time, her ward met at the morning session, and it was just impossible for her to get her child and herself ready in time. (Chronic pain is usually much worse in the mornings than the rest of the day.)

She even asked him if she could attend services at the ward that met in the afternoon, and he was insistent she could not.

He also accused her of being a drug addict because of the pain pills she took. In fact, when she told me what she took, I was appalled, as it was not near enough to give her adequate pain relief.

One example of what the ward thought of her was when the Relief Society president asked if there was anything they could do to help her. She told them how difficult it was to mop her floors and that that would really help. The Relief Society came over with a new mop, gave it to her, and left.

However, she also spoke of the time when the Young Women’s group came to her house and cleaned it from top to bottom. Rather than be embarrassed at her home’s condition, she was all about gratitude.

I explained this sister’s experiences with her ward to a bishop who is a friend of mine, and he said he would have done things differently. And I am certain her experience was not the norm, but it can happen.

Her testimony was very strong, and in fact, she was desperate to go through the temple. She was always afraid she could not have her daughter sealed to her if she didn’t go through the temple. I think she has that wrong, but I don’t know for sure.

She has since moved to another state, and the ward is very supportive of her, including her bishop understanding she cannot always make it to meetings. I do not know if she was able to get a temple recommend, but I suspect she was.

My point is, that while hidden disabilities are the most difficult for members to acknowledge, there are cases where a physical disability is dismissed as well.

Do you have anyone who could be an advocate for you, that could explain to your bishop how impossible it would be for you to make every meeting? Sometimes hearing it from someone else, especially a professional, helps them understand your situation better.

Elphaba

[richlittell]

Strange indeed!

Anyone can join the church. Maybe the nature of your disability is of concern. Is it mental? If it's only physical that should not be a problem. Maybe members in your ward are just not familiar with helping people with disabilities or something. But if you feel you have a testimony, insist on Baptism until you get some clear answers. There are circumstances where a physical disability accompanied by a mental one might forego the need for a baptism, but even then, just like little children, ALL are welcome into God's Church (though I think that this is not your situation). If yours is only an attendance problem, I can't understand why you can't get baptized. but it is hard for us to know of the particulars of your situation. I know the Aaronic Priesthood used to take sacrament to a disabled elderly lady every Sunday in my ward. Just keep talking with your Bishop until you clear up any unresolved issues.

Edited September 27, 2008 by richlittell

[Moksha]

In my ward they take the Communion Sacrament around to all the members who are too ill to attend. Perhaps doing this at a branch level may be too unwieldy because of travel distances.