I'm Giving Up

[RainofGold]

Hoosierguy,

I am glad to hear that you are feeling better. Even though I don't know you I was thinking about how you might be feeling the whole day. And when I came home tonight and checked your post was excited to see that the storm has passed and all is well.

I know that we grow stronger from our weakness when we seek the Lords help. I hope you know that you have a friend in me and that I will be praying for you. Our Heavenly Father loves you and cares for you, so much that he sent His Son to die for you and me so that we can returned to Him someday.

Rainofgold

[Leap]

"Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty." Mother Teresa.

True. And something more horrible - not being needed. In a pit, deep in a jungle, were no one comes to offer a rope or even looks down the pit. A man and a testimony.

Hoosier Guy, interesting that you would quote Mother Teresa. She is one of my heroes. She was also very qualified to make the statement you quoted. I don't know if you've heard that after she died they found documents and others confirmed that for many years she did not feel even God's approval of her service. They said that she had felt it so often up to a certain point, and then it was taken from her. (Could possibly be because she prayed to feel Christ's Atonement with Him, but only God knows) After a long time, she prayed to feel His approval, and she got a wonderful peaceful feeling for several weeks. Then it was gone again for decades. She struggled and struggled through her time on this earth. She felt so lonely and abandoned by God, but she kept pressing forward. She kept serving, and never revealed to the world her pain or doubt. I'm sure she will someday realize that what C.S. Lewis said is true that, "Some people feel guilty about their anxieties and regard them as a defect of faith but they are afflictions, not sins. Like all afflictions, they are, if we can so take them, our share in the passion of Christ."

[HoosierGuy]

All is ok! All is great! I testified today! I will say it again – I TESTIFIED TODAY! This was my first time. I did it! For my Lord and my Father! This has been eating me up inside. I’m good for six months or so! lol

Sorry for the negative posts.

All is not good. All is great!

Full speed ahead!

My arsenal has been restocked. I'm a big battleship heading out sea, full speed ahead! I'm not navigating by the stars - Jesus is my navigator!

Bring it on!!!!

I will say it again - I testified today!

[pam]

Hoosier Guy, interesting that you would quote Mother Teresa. She is one of my heroes. She was also very qualified to make the statement you quoted. I don't know if you've heard that after she died they found documents and others confirmed that for many years she did not feel even God's approval of her service. They said that she had felt it so often up to a certain point, and then it was taken from her. (Could possibly be because she prayed to feel Christ's Atonement with Him, but only God knows) After a long time, she prayed to feel His approval, and she got a wonderful peaceful feeling for several weeks. Then it was gone again for decades. She struggled and struggled through her time on this earth. She felt so lonely and abandoned by God, but she kept pressing forward. She kept serving, and never revealed to the world her pain or doubt. I'm sure she will someday realize that what C.S. Lewis said is true that, "Some people feel guilty about their anxieties and regard them as a defect of faith but they are afflictions, not sins. Like all afflictions, they are, if we can so take them, our share in the passion of Christ."

She is one of my heroes as well. Truly amazing lady.

[richlittell]

...

My arsenal has been restocked. I'm a big battleship heading out sea, full speed ahead! I'm not navigating by the stars - Jesus is my navigator!

Bring it on!!!!

Go get 'em tiger! growwl.

[eternalpromise516]

awesome! knock 'em dead

[HoosierGuy]

In a pit, deep in a jungle, were no one comes to offer a rope or even looks down the pit. A man and a testimony.

This man and his testimony climbed out of the pit today and is trekking thru the jungle back to civilization! :)

Then again, the jungle has a lot of wonderful things in it made by Heavenly Father. I just might stay in the jungle for a while and do some missionary work on the jungle natives!

[pam]

Watch out for the cannibals though. lol If they start approaching you with knife and fork..RUN!!!!

[HoosierGuy]

Hoosier:

What these verses are saying is -- relying on other people to give you comfort or peace or guidance will result in our being disappointed in some fashion!!

You got that right.

[HoosierGuy]

HoosierGuys two biggest questions -

1. Is HoosierGuy going to get the Melchizedek Priesthood in 2009?

2. Is HoosierGuy ever going to join so many others and be offered a moderator position on lds.net?

3. Sometimes HoosierGuy is on chat and on the boards and sees lots of moderators and wonders - why have I not been offered a mod position?

Ok, that is three questions or two and a half questions and one statement. But you get the point I'm trying to make.

[Hemidakota]

I can't take this anymore. I'm giving up. No, I'm not leaving the Church or stop going to services. I'm giving up on something else.

If I disappeared off the face of the earth I doubt anybody would notice. So, why not disappear? It would probably make some people happy anyway!

President Monson said - ... As we survey the challenges of life, that which is easy is rarely right. In fact, the course that we should properly follow appears at times impossible, impenetrable, hopeless.”

Impossible? Yep. Impenetrable? Oh yes. Hopeless? Seems so. But at least I'm not lonely. Oh wait, I am!

I think the Circus will go on without me. I doubt if any of the performers would miss me. I doubt if the audience would miss me. Maybe the paymaster would miss me. Then again, he would probably say - "I'm glad he's gone. He was nothing but a whiner anyway. Not worth his check."

Maybe the lions would miss me - they always look at me as a possible future meal. Then again - out of sight out of mind; and that is so true.

And it is true for me, unfortunately - out of sight, out of mind. And the world keeps going on.

Yep. I'm not in a good mood. I feel horrible. More horrible than you know. And the above is the best I can say right now. But if anybody wants to knock me upside the head with a sledgehammer, feel free to do it. Out of sight, out of mind.

Sorry for the negative post.

We have our moments in life and may not be well received by the world or members in the church.

[eternalpromise516]

i think if you keep on the path you've just got back onto, then yes you will

[HoosierGuy]

DARKNESS

I'm swimming all alone in a pool of darkness

and I feel like darkness is slowly pulling me under

I yell for help but no one is there to hear it

I begin to see the water at eye level

and I kick and flail

fighting to stay above the darkness

But the darkness won't let go of its hold on me

and I slowly begin to give in

to the feeling that lies below the water line

the waters starts to fill my lungs

the lungs that once held so much life

yet now they allow the murky water to replace that

I know that this path doesn't lead to happiness

But why doesn't someone grab my hand

pull me from darkness's grasp?

because no one knows I stand at the boundary

the boundary between light and dark

so I give in to the thing that holds me

All of the strength and all of the courage

that I once held in my heart

can't save me from the water

So I slowly slip below the world of conscientiousness

undetected by the occupants of that world

I don't want to fight anymore

I've given into darkness

The pool of darkness I'm swimming in is as large as the Pacific Ocean. Imagine, me, in the middle of the Pacific, not in the shipping lanes. Down I go. Can you hear my scream for help? No, impossible, being far out in the Pacific. Impossible. And my last words – “Father, help me. Jesus help me. I have no one else.” Father, help me. Jesus help me. I have no one else.