Heavenly Mother

[vegasbay]

To make this short and to the point, my mother is severely bipolar and obsessive-compulsive. She also suffered severe verbal, physical, and sexual abuse as a child. Because of that, she obviously has many issues that are still not resolved, and may never be resolved in this lifetime. I am 21 years old and the youngest of four children. I am trying to come to terms with my earthly family and trying to love and accept my mother for who she is: my biological egg donor, a mother in every sense, but a real mom in very few. It is safe to say that our mother-daughter relationship is nearly nonexistent.

Recently, the doctrine of our Heavenly Mother came to mind and this brought me great comfort - although my earthly mother is severely mentally disabled and incapable of being a true parent, I have two exalted, perfected parents who know every hair on my head and love me with a depth incomprehensible to my earthly mind.

We know from revelation that She exists as Heavenly Father's eternal companion, but there is so little else. At this time in my life, when I am going through major changes from child to adult, it is very difficult to have a mother who can't be my mom. While keeping the discussion reverent and relevant to the topic and Honoring her in every way that we do our Eternal Father, I would like to know your opinions/experiences/thoughts about our Heavenly Mother.

[MissKitty]

Though not answering the question you asked, I wanted to say this.

Your mother though perhaps not perfect and perhaps her ability te parent is marred by her past is still your mother. I am certain that she loves you, with a love that is more perfect than any other love that this world can possess, that love is the love of a parent to a child. Perhaps your mother finds it difficult to show this love to you perhaps even she finds it hard to comprehend that she has these feelings for you but one day your mother, a long with all of us, will return to Heavenly Father and will be complete and will be perfect.

I want to say to you treasure your mother, the lady who carried you for nine months of her life. I would say look at your mother for the lady she is now. Focus on the positivs and all the things she can and has done. A lot of joy can be found in looking for perfection in the seemingly imperfect.

With all due respect, I feel, when we look at others and judge them and say they are inperfect we must also look at ourselves. After all no one is "perfect".

I feel perfection is being the very best one can be. Perhaps your mother, though limited in her ability, is striving to do her very best though this may not be comparable to say an average able mothers ability.

I'll will also add that yes i do believe there is a Heavenly mother and I am sure she is wonderful too :)

[Hemidakota]

To make this short and to the point, my mother is severely bipolar and obsessive-compulsive. She also suffered severe verbal, physical, and sexual abuse as a child. Because of that, she obviously has many issues that are still not resolved, and may never be resolved in this lifetime. I am 21 years old and the youngest of four children. I am trying to come to terms with my earthly family and trying to love and accept my mother for who she is: my biological egg donor, a mother in every sense, but a real mom in very few. It is safe to say that our mother-daughter relationship is nearly nonexistent.

Recently, the doctrine of our Heavenly Mother came to mind and this brought me great comfort - although my earthly mother is severely mentally disabled and incapable of being a true parent, I have two exalted, perfected parents who know every hair on my head and love me with a depth incomprehensible to my earthly mind.

We know from revelation that She exists as Heavenly Father's eternal companion, but there is so little else. At this time in my life, when I am going through major changes from child to adult, it is very difficult to have a mother who can't be my mom. While keeping the discussion reverent and relevant to the topic and Honoring her in every way that we do our Eternal Father, I would like to know your opinions/experiences/thoughts about our Heavenly Mother.

She does exist...I suspect do to your mothers past abuse, it will be corrected in the next stage of her life. Just keep loving her for being your earthly mother.

[Just_A_Guy]

I'm neither a therapist nor a theologian, but it strikes me that we really know (as opposed to inferring) so little about Heavenly Mother that your particular needs aren't going to be filled so much by an academic study of Her as they would be by building relationships with stable, mature women in the here-and-now.

(Your mileage may vary, though. :))

[vegasbay]

Though not answering the question you asked, I wanted to say this.

Your mother though perhaps not perfect and perhaps her ability te parent is marred by her past is still your mother. I am certain that she loves you, with a love that is more perfect than any other love that this world can possess, that love is the love of a parent to a child. Perhaps your mother finds it difficult to show this love to you perhaps even she finds it hard to comprehend that she has these feelings for you but one day your mother, a long with all of us, will return to Heavenly Father and will be complete and will be perfect.

I want to say to you treasure your mother, the lady who carried you for nine months of her life. I would say look at your mother for the lady she is now. Focus on the positivs and all the things she can and has done. A lot of joy can be found in looking for perfection in the seemingly imperfect.

With all due respect, I feel, when we look at others and judge them and say they are inperfect we must also look at ourselves. After all no one is "perfect".

I feel perfection is being the very best one can be. Perhaps your mother, though limited in her ability, is striving to do her very best though this may not be comparable to say an average able mothers ability.

I'll will also add that yes i do believe there is a Heavenly mother and I am sure she is wonderful too :)

Perhaps I didn't make myself clear enough in my original post. What you advised me to do is exactly what I am trying to do. I know my mother loves me as only a parent can. I know that she cared for me and raised me as best as she could. I know that I am not any more perfect than my mother, but there is a part of every human being that longs for, and indeed needs the complete love and nurturing of both parents. If that need is not filled, it leaves a longing, aching hole in the very core of the soul that cannot be filled by anything else. I equate it to losing a limb. The human body is designed to function with two legs - a person can lose a leg and still live a very function, productive, and meaningful life. But in order to get to that point, there is a process that takes that person from the first stages of severe disability, relying on the help of others and assistive devices, up to the point of prosthesis, where a person can function quite independently, but it is still obvious that the leg is still missing. Finally, a person becomes so adept at their new lifestyle that it is not obvious to anyone that there is something missing unless the disabled person reveals it to them. It is much the same way with children who lose a parent, whether through death, divorce, or disability.

I've learned to function independently and I'm working on leading a meaningful and productive life. I am trying very hard to include my mother in that life. Let me say that I love my mom more than I think that even I know, but the fact remains that she is incapable of functioning as a complete mother. I accept that as one of the challenges Father in Heaven has given me in this life. I draw comfort from the knowledge that I have a Mother in Heaven, and some day I will know her and I will know my earthly mother in her perfect form.

In the meantime, I am left to fill the hole left in my heart. Although it may not be obvious to anyone else, it is still very real and very painful to me.

[MissKitty]

I feel strong empathy with what you are saying, witch is why I wanted to reply earlier. Though probably not as disabled my father is seriously affected by dyslexia. It affects his judgement and awareness. He finds it hard to make desicions and can be tactless at times.

I some times look back on my childhood with some resentment. Why couldn't I have been the little girl who was a princess in her daddys eyes? Why couldn't he treasure me and protect me like "fathers" do?

Why did he have to lash out at me when I was a teenager and not give me the father daughter heart to heart that I craved when I was running around screaming? Why couldn't he catch me when I fell off those monkey bars in the park when I was a little girl? Why at sixtreen when I left with the social worker to go into a foster home did he just wave and say "bye then"

(major point I didn't leave because of my dad, my dad wasn't a violent father but he did smack me a few times when I got upset, however the memory is still sore in my head hence i mention it)

The thing is dad sees it all differently to how I see things. He isn't as aware as I am. Perhaps his world is more black and white to him. Good and bad. I'm not so sure, I want to go to an evening class at college on understanding dyslexia to try and understand how dad views the world.

Only recently, a few years after leaving home, I feel I am starting to get to know my dad. We are actually quite a like me and dad! We both love classical music in particular shostakovich and when he comes over to my flat we listen. We discuss the scriptures and our beliefs and I have found out that dad is a very spiritual man.

One day when he came round he started to cry and he asked me "Have I been a good father to you? I some times think I havn't been there enough". I replied "That times had been hard for our family but life is very good now" and I told him how I love him and loved spending time with him.

For all the mistakes he's made I do love him and it does make me sad to think I must have hurt him also as at night he will ask mum, "Does Kathleen love me?"

I think I must have just been too caught up in the dillusion that dad wasn't normal and found it hard to accept him but dad is my dad.. and for all his short comings he has such a clear knowledge and love of our savior and the gospel and and such a deep love for me.

[TheAngelPalmoni]

Heavenly Parents, I love thinking about it. I wonder if having a bunch of little spirit children running around is really how it is or if there is no such thing as a child spirit. Well can't wait to find out... I wonder how they feel everything.

web.me.com/angelpalmoni

Angel Palmoni

[Traveler]

To make this short and to the point, my mother is severely bipolar and obsessive-compulsive. She also suffered severe verbal, physical, and sexual abuse as a child. Because of that, she obviously has many issues that are still not resolved, and may never be resolved in this lifetime. I am 21 years old and the youngest of four children. I am trying to come to terms with my earthly family and trying to love and accept my mother for who she is: my biological egg donor, a mother in every sense, but a real mom in very few. It is safe to say that our mother-daughter relationship is nearly nonexistent.

Recently, the doctrine of our Heavenly Mother came to mind and this brought me great comfort - although my earthly mother is severely mentally disabled and incapable of being a true parent, I have two exalted, perfected parents who know every hair on my head and love me with a depth incomprehensible to my earthly mind.

We know from revelation that She exists as Heavenly Father's eternal companion, but there is so little else. At this time in my life, when I am going through major changes from child to adult, it is very difficult to have a mother who can't be my mom. While keeping the discussion reverent and relevant to the topic and Honoring her in every way that we do our Eternal Father, I would like to know your opinions/experiences/thoughts about our Heavenly Mother.

No one has an earthly parent that did not fall short somewhere - likewise we all fall short as parents with our children. Because of the sacrifice and atonement of Christ we can move past the short comings and on toward repentance with a different view of our selves and others (including our parents).

As far as knowing our heavenly parents there is very little to know - even of our Father. There are no scriptures specific to him that I know of - just types and shadows in Christ and others that live Christ like. It would appear that the best source of knowing our heavenly parents is in being the best parent we can to our children (which includes loving, with all our hearts, our children's other parent).

The Traveler

[HEthePrimate]

vegasbay,

My late wife was abused and neglected as a child. As a result, she had a difficult time even calling God "Heavenly Father," because that would seem to associate him with her earthly father. I think the combination of Heavenly Mother and a Savior who lived on this earth helped her deal with her feelings and come to know a loving God.

Peace,

HEP